Desolation by J. B. Everett (read more books .txt) 📕

still there the whole time that I was arguing with Ian. For a few moments, there is a tense silence between us. Then finally, Tristan breaks it.

"Tessa, can I ask you a question?"

I turn to him, my vision blurred from the tears pooling in my eyes.

"Yeah?" I ask miserably.

"Why do you like Ian?"

I look at him for a few moments, processing what he just said. Did he seriously just ask me why I am with Ian?

"I mean don't take this the wrong way, but he's kind of an asshole. He doesn't treat you right and you know it. I don't think that you should be with him" Tristan says.

I am suddenly filled with a swell of anger towards Tristan. Why does he think he has the authority to choose who I should be with?

I immediately stand up and begin to walk away from him.

"Tessa! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you!" he calls out from behind me.

But I don't turn around. Instead, I keep walking away as fast as I can. Tears roll down my cheeks and I wipe them away hastily. Everything is just so complicated. When I think about it, I honestly don't know what draws me to Ian. He is asshole (kind of). He is rude. He is irrational. He overreacts to everything.

He is complicated.

But I am complicated too. And I am the only one who know his other side. The side that comes out of him when just him and I are together. When he smiles. When he jokes around. When he kisses me.

I think more about why I am not with Tristan. I mean why aren't I? He is extremely attractive, kind and caring. But the more that i think about it, I realize that I am afraid to be with him. I am afraid that I cannot be as good of a person as he is. I am not as kind and caring as Tristan. Although I may not show it, there is a selfish and rude person that lives inside of me; a person like Ian. It is scary to think about it but I know that if I were given the opportunity the leave this island and go back home, I would probably go and leave everyone else behind.

That's why I find myself falling back to Ian. Although he might not be a good person, I understand him and he understands me.

And now he hates me.

I continue to walk, with absolutely no clue where I am going. The twigs snap under my feet as I trek through the jungle aimlessly. I look up at the trees and stop when I see two beautiful parrots, perched on a branch. The parrots are side by side with their wings wrapped around each other. One of them is nuzzling the other ones feathers. I think to myself,

They truly love each other.

And suddenly, out of nowhere, I begin to cry.

The parrots look down at me, their beady eyes looking into mine. I keep crying and crying, big fat tears rolling down my cheeks.

Damn, I am an absolute mess.

After a few minutes, I find the strength to pull myself together and keep walking. As I walk, I wipe the tears from my cheeks and try to push the thoughts of Ian out of my mind.

"Tessa?"

I jump and look up to see Dylan, Nikki and Eve, sitting beside the wrecked helicopter. They look up at me and I realize that they must be able to tell that I was just crying.

"What's wrong?" Nikki asks, standing up.

I don't want to tell her in front of everyone. Especially in front of Eve, who is a complete stranger. Chapter Forty

The first thing that I do is scream. And then, I run. Adrenaline pumps through my veins as I charge behind her, my arms outstretched in front of me.

"STOP!" I yell.

When she doesn't turn around, I lunge forward, grabbing and slamming her to the ground.

Hard.

She screams out in agony as I jump on top of her, pressing her arms to the ground. Before she can make a move, I wrench the knife out of her hands and hold it to her throat.

"What the hell are you doing!" she cries, her eyes wide with fear.

"Do you want to explain to me why you were going to kill Ian?" I ask through gritted teeth.

Ian.

I look up to see him standing a few feet away, staring at me with wide eyes.

"What are you talking about?!" Eve exclaims.

I look back down at her, anger burning in my eyes. Why is she trying to cover it up that she was just going to kill him?

"You know exactly what I'm talking about" I say bitterly.

"Tessa, I don't know what you are talking about. I saw one of the doctors, and I was going to attack him until you tackled me to the ground" she explains.

I stare at her for a few moments, utterly bewildered.

"So you're telling me you saw one of the doctors?" I exclaim outrageously.

"Yes!" Eve shouts.

"You didn't see a doctor! It's Ian; you were about to kill him! How did you not recognize him?" I ask.

"It was dark! I thought that he was one of them and I'm sorry!" Eve exclaims desperately.

I scrutinize her. No matter what she says to try to defend herself, I do not trust her. Ian doesn't have a white lab coat on; there is no way that she could of thought that he was one of the doctors.

"Can you please take the knife off of my throat! It hurts" Eve says.

Reluctantly, I pull the knife away from her throat. She sits up and rubs her neck, looking at me.

"Geez, you are a psycho" she mutters.

No, you are.

"Can I have my knife back?" she asks, holding out her hand.

"No way" I say firmly, standing up and putting the knife in my pocket.

I look up to see Ian, still staring at us silently. When my eyes meet with his, my cheeks begin to burn and my heart starts to beat faster.

Finally, he breaks the silence and asks,

"What the fuck just happened?"

I swallow hard. How do I explain to him what just happened?

"She tried to kill you" I say quickly, pointing at Eve.

Eve crosses her arms, rolling her eyes.

"I did not. My eyes deceived me and I thought that you were one of the doctors. I'm sorry Ian, you know that I would never hurt you. Tessa is just overreacting" Eve says to Ian.

A wave of rage passes through me. She is lying, and I know it.

"Bullshit!" I yell at her furiously.

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Eve looks at me, a smirk on her lips. And in that moment, I wish that I had slit her throat.

"Look, I don't have time for your fighting. Leave me alone" Ian says.

He then turns around and begins to walk away.

"Wait!" I shout.

But he doesn't turn around. He keeps walking away into the darkness, trudging through the thick underbrush. I hear laughing and turn around to see Eve, smirking at me.

"Looks like you guys are still having problems?" she snickers.

"Fuck you" I spit, then turn around and start walking after Ian.

Damn, I have never met someone who made me this angry ever before. She is a complete stranger, yet she thinks that she can get involved in my problems. And I don't trust her at all. Especially after what she just did.

"Ian!" I call out, searching for him.

I walk aimlessly, trying to follow the sound of his footsteps.

"Ian, please stop!" I call out again.

I suddenly emerge into a clearing and find him, sitting on a rock with his back towards me. He is illuminated in the darkness by a beam of moonlight shining through the thick canopy of the trees.

"Ian..." I whisper.

"What do you want" he snaps, his back still towards me.

"You have to come back" I say.

"And why should I? Aren't you happy that you get Tristan all to yourself now?" he asks, turning around and glaring at me.

"Ian, what the hell are talking about? You're completely overreacting!" I exclaim.

How can I get it through his head that I am not with Tristan?

"You know exactly what I'm talking about; I told you before. You want to be with Tristan. And I get it. He's kind. He's smart. He's caring. He's actually a good person. I don't see why you would ever choose me over him" Ian says bitterly.

I take a step towards him, compose myself, then say,

"Ian, I will say this one last time. I want to be with you, not Tristan"

He stares at me for a few moments, then asks,

"Why?"

"You want to really know why?" I ask.

He nods.

"Because I'm not as kind as him. I'm not as smart as him. I'm not as caring as him. And I am most definitely not as good of a person as he is. I am flawed"

I pause, then add,

"Just like you are"

He stares at me, his eyes locked with mine.

"And if that's not enough, then I don't know what to say" I say.

Ian stands up and begins to walk towards me. With every step that he takes, my heart beats faster and faster. Finally, he stops right in front of me. I swallow hard, looking up into his eyes.

"You don't have to say anything else" he murmurs.

And then, he leans in and presses his lips against mine. He wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me close to his body. In this moment, I forget about everything else going on. All that I know right now is Ian, and all that he knows right now is me.

He lifts one of his hands, running his fingers through my hair as he deepens our kiss. I moan as his fingers run down the back of my neck, sending shivers throughout my entire body. I don't know how long we kiss for, but we finally break apart when I cannot breathe anymore. With our foreheads pressed together, we stay like that for a few blissful moments. When my breath finally returns back to normal I take a step back and look up at him. And for the first time in what seems like a forever, he smiles. But not his typical smirk. It is a true, genuine smile.

I can't help but smile back at him, my cheeks blushing.

"You are so damn cute" he murmurs.

I giggle, my cheeks burning even brighter.

"Hey, I'm really sorry. I'm going to try not to overreact as much anymore" he says.

"That would be nice" I say, laughing.

He grins back at me then wraps his arm around me, pulling me close to his side.

"Let's go back" he says as we begin to walk through the jungle.

A few moments later, he asks,

"So what's the deal with that Eve girl?"

"Don't even get me started. She is a bitch and she is not trustworthy. Something is up with her; she tried to kill you" I say.

"But she said that she thought I was a doctor? That's why she was going to attack me" Ian says.

I look up at him.

"She was lying! How could she think that you were one of the doctors?" I ask.

He shrugs.

We continue to walk in silence, the