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I went and held her hand.

 

“That information is confidential.” She stated firmly.

 

The doctor started to giggle.

 

“Secret….” I said trying to be serious.

 

“I ate food and I drank juice.” She said softly.

 

“What kind of food and juice?” The doctor asked.

 

“The average kind dipshit.” She said coldly.

 

“Secret!” Leelah scolded.

 

“I just ate regular food. They made me eat it everyday.” 

 

“They?” she asked me. “Daniel and the Devil.” She answered for me.

 

“Devil?” Leelah questioned.

 

“His girlfriend, Miss Divine.” She said coldly.

 

“What kind of juice?” Dr. Pollum asked.

 

“I don’t know, they told me it was vitamin juice. I had to drink it everyday or they would….” she stopped talking.

 

“Or…they would what?” I asked.

 

“Nothing, I just had to drink it everyday before and after school.” She said quickly.

 

“Who burned you?” I asked sternly.

 

The room fell quiet. I looked her in her eyes.

 

“No one did. The curling irons fell on me.” She said quietly.

 

“It fell on you...huh?” I asked.

 

She just looked at me nervously. “…yea…fell on me.” she said flatly.

 

“Ok…” I said softly while starring at her. 

 

The doctor asked me to step out of the room. “We're going to have to contact her parent or guardian. They need to be here.” he told me.

 

“You cant.” I said simply, feeling the heat getting hotter inside of me.

 

“Why not?” he asked.

 

“Because he's the one that did it to her. He harmed her!" I heard myself getting a little loud.

 

“Well Mr. Rodriguez how can you be so sure? We cant just go around pointing the finger.” he explained.

 

“But Dr. I am certain tha--.”

 

“Look, we just cant do that. Now if you really believe this then we can have a few security and a social worker on the stand by when he gets here.”

 

“No...that's not necessary.”  I said.

 

“Are you sure?” He asked.

 

“Yes.” I said uncertainly.

 

“The school has already called home. Were going to try to call this time.” He said walking away from me.

 

I stood there helpless. I went to Secret's room to let Leelah know I was leaving and I'd be right back. Secret was laying down wither eyes closed.

 

“Where are you goin?" She asked.

 

“I have to go do something.” I answered as I grabbed my coat and left.

 

I got into my car and drove away. I needed to clear my head. Then I knew exactly where I wanted to go. All kinds of thoughts and memories went through my mind. I had mixed emotions. I finally arrived to my destination and walked into the building. I went to the door and knocked. A man answered.

 

“Are you Daniel Stone?” I asked.

 

“Yea…" I just looked at him in silence, there was something familiar about him. “Can I help you?”

 

 I could see a woman in the background. Going in and out of different rooms.

 

“Oh, well I um just have something to drop off to you.” I said.

 

“What?”

 

“This.” I said coldly as I punched him hard, clear across his face.

 

His nose was bleeding and I didn’t care. I kept punching and kicking him, I felt like my father had possessed my body. I all of a sudden became him, my punches and kicks were harder than ever. I lost all control. I had thrown him against the wall several times. He even got a few licks in and when I realized what I was doing, I didn’t mean to do it, but I wasn’t sorry. The guy was coughing up blood, I heard a woman screaming at me and pushing me.

 

“Leave him alone! Leave him alone!” she kept squealing.

 

I stopped and just looked at her. Then I grabbed her by her collar and shoved her against the wall.

 

“What was in the juice?” I asked trying not to loose control because she was a female.

 

“What are you talk---.” She said. I started to choke the bitch.

 

“Don’t play dumb, you know exactly what juice I’m talking about.” I said trying hard not to loose my temper.

 

She didn’t say anything, temper lost. I choked her a little harder, and then she decided to speak. I let her go and she dropped to the floor. She started to cough and she couldn’t breathe. I threw a half empty water bottle at her that was sitting on the table. She quickly picked it up and drank a little from it. While she coughed a little bit I asked her again

 

“What was in the juice?”

 

“Lysol…” She coughed. “I used the purple one, I put it in with grape juice. I told her that it was vitamin juice.” She said trying to catch her breath.

 

I just looked at her. I couldn’t believe what I had heard.

 

“You hit women! You’re a coward! ” she yelled. I pinned her up against the wall.

 

“Bitch, don’t you ever say that to me again! You’re not even a person, poisoning little girls?!” I screamed. “You are trash and you don’t deserve to be called human. You’re a little girl yourself!”

 

I was instantly pissed so I had to try really hard to restrain myself from choking this bitch to death. I couldn’t hold it so I took my anger out on Daniel. He tried to get up and I kicked him right back down. I felt tired and started to walk towards the door. Before I walked out I turned to look at them. The lady that Secret calls Devil, was crying in the corner looking at me.

 

“Shut the hell up, what are you crying for? You’re not the one in the hospital, yet…” I said sarcastically. Daniel was still on the floor, coughing and trying to get up. The lady crawled over to him. I ran my fingers through my hair and started to count and take deep breaths.

 

“If…she were my own daughter, you two….would be fucking dead.” I said trying to catch my breath as I turned and limped a little down the hallway. I got into my car and drove off back to the hospital. I was extremely angry. I had to pull over twice to calm down. I know I have my father’s temper, but I had never in my entire life let it get this bad and posses. I surprised myself, my papa was a mad man.

 

Who knows what kind of things I’m capable of, but all because of this little girl? Why do I care so much about her? Why am I so protective of her? I ask myself these questions everyday since i met her. For some strange reason, she’s always on my mind. Am I pedophile? I asked myself once. Hell no, that’s sick! Then why do I find myself thinking of her? I would respond.

 

Then out of no where, as I was in a slight traffic jam, I looked up and saw a billboard for some jewelry that said “There’s a girl in your life, and you love her! Get her gift today!” And then I realized: I do love her, I love her a lot. My heart began to soften, and I returned to “Miguel”. I started to go through the memories of Secret and I. How she’d call me a stalker daily. Her laugh, her smile, her beautiful eyes, and her personality. It all made me smile.

 

Then I knew what I wanted and needed to do, make her mine. I don’t have children, and I would be more than happy to take care of her. But I want to ask her first, to see if she would like the same... I don’t want to force anything on her and make her feel uncomfortable. When I got back to the hospital, I scurried to go into Secret’s room. All of a sudden, her doctor stopped me and said we needed to talk.

 

“What happened to you?” he asked me. I didn't respond, I was too excited to tell him my news.

 

“Wait, may I go first? I would like to adopt her, I don’t want to see her in a foster home. And i don't care how long it would take.” I said trying to catch my breath.

 

“Oh, well um, that may be a problem…” he said pausing. I looked at him with a disappointed and confused face.

 

“Why?”

 

“Well, her…mother is here…” he said.

 

“Mother?” I repeated softly. I thought she didn't have one.

 

“Yes, she arrived a few minutes after you left. She insists on taking Secret home after we release her.” he said sympathetically. â€śWell, didn't you know she had one? You are her teacher right?”

 

“Yes but I never knew her. Secret told me she didn't have one.” I answered.

 

“Well, would you like to meet her?”

 

“…Sure.” I said a little disappointed.

 

We walked quietly to Secret’s room. When we walked in, a woman was sitting on Secret’s bed and stroking her hair as she was sleeping. She was humming a song, it sounded like Hush little baby. My mother used to sing me that when I was small.

 

“Hush little baby, don’t say a word…mama’s gonna buy you a mockingbird…” she softly sang out loud. Secret was asleep, but you could tell she was listening.

 

“Ms. Reevis…I would like you to meet Mr. Rodriguez, Secret’s teacher.” Dr. Pollum introduced.

 

She turned with a smile to look at me. But she froze completely and her smile faded. I returned the glare as she looked familiar.

 

“He was an excellent caregiver to your daughter.” He said. She didn't respond to him.

 

“…T…Tamar?” I asked softly.

 

“Miguel?” she asked.

 

“Oh, you two already know each other.” Dr. Pollum smiled.

 

“Look at you…y…you look beautiful.” I complimented.

 

“...Thank you.” She replied with a straight face.

 

“Oh yes, very.” Dr. Pollum added.

 

We both looked at him. “…I’ll um…leave you two alone. Oh  and Mr. Rodriguez, Ms. Marie went to get some food.”

 

“Alright.” I nodded.

 

“So…you’re a teacher?” she asked smiling. “I am too….well I’m a daycare's assistant.” She said with a smile.

 

“That’s very nice.” I said softly. “So, this is your daughter?” I asked.

 

“Yes…” she answered and looked down. It was quiet for a minute. Leelah walked in with some Popeyes. She handed Tamar a Strawberry soda.

 

“Here you go honey.” She said as she passed her the drink.

 

“Thank you.” Tamar said. I kept glaring at her before she finally turned her back to me.

 

“Is she your only one?” I asked her. There was silence.

 

“Tamar…” I said sternly. She turned slightly but did not look at me.

 

“Tamar, don’t ignore me.” I warned.

 

“What?” She said confused.

 

“You heard me the first time. Is she your only child?” I asked again.

 

Leelah just looked at us both confused. Secret started to move a little, as a sign of waking up. I gently grabbed Tamar by the arm and pulled her into the hallway and away from the door.

 

“What are you doing!? Stop it!” she said frantically as she yanked her arm away and backed up a little.

 

“Is she the only kid you have?” I asked sternly. She just looked at me, like she was scared to speak.

 

“Is she the only one?!” I yelled. Her eyes became slightly watery.

 

She moved her mouth a little but no words came out. I started walking towards her slowly and she slowly backed away until she hit a wall and couldn’t move away anymore.

 

“Why so nervous?” I asked.

 

I placed one hand on the wall near her head and the other on my hip as I made complete eye contact, she hates it.

 

“I…I’m not nervous…” she replied.

 

“Really? So, is she… the only… one?” I asked extremely frustrated.

 

“Yes! Yes, She is the only one, would you like to know anything else?!” she asked sarcastically.

 

I looked down and then back at her. “…Is…Is she mine?” I asked quietly.

 

“Yes…” she answered quietly after a few seconds. I slowly backed away from her, not releasing my eye contact until I turned and sat down on the bench.  So did she but on the other end and we were quiet for a while.

 

Secret:

 

I just woke up and I feel like shit. And who is this touching me? Oh… that’s Ms. Marie.

 

“Hi Secret, how ya feeling?” She asked.

 

“Good.” I answered.

 

It was quiet for a minute. I had a dream with someone singing to me. But the person didn't have a face. But I felt comfortable and I loved her voice. I never have normal dreams.

 

“Can I call

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