The Happiness Project by M K (top ebook reader .txt) 📕

If you are still here with me, then I applaude you. You want to hear more about my life? Or you just want to see the ending? I don't know how this will end or when. My life is continuing and changing everyday, so how can I predict that? Also, if you have not noticed my story is very random. My thoughts are constantly changing and the order in which life happens is sporadic. I am trying to infuse the aspect that, nothing is a set pattern. NOTHING. Everything is different, random, unpredictable and strange sometimes. I want to keep you on your toes and I hope you will enjoy the aspect, that you will always read something new. 

The happiness project is a kind of journal for me. Have you noticed yet? I can feel that my honesty is helping me, slowly but surely. Who wants to read someone’s journal and know all of their secrets anyway? Nosy people? Mean people? Interested people or caring people? Is it all of the above or none? I would want to read someone journal just to figure out a mystery. You can’t be considered to be nosy though, if I am openly showing you this.

Today, My mind is a mess. Does this worry you? It worries me. I don’t worry too hard, because tomorrow I will feel as if the world in wrapped in my hands. I need some actual adventure in my life. I need to take a risk and when I mean take a risk, I don’t mean bungee jumping or smoking cigarettes. I do smoke cigarettes by the way, that is why I love the cover. Did you notice the beauty of the rainbow tinted smoke? By the way, there is nothing beautiful about smoking. It is fun at first, until you go without one for eight hours and turn on the world and everything you love as you have a withdrawal from the precious drug known as Nicotine. Smoking restricts the blood vessels, giving the smoker a sensation that they are calm. I am always nervous, so I believe that I am somehow helping myself. Ironic how wrong I am, right? I know what your going to say, it causes cancer. Apparently, so does that air, the microwave, the food we eat everyday and possible everything in the universe. I realize that I may be harming myself at the moment, but I promise I won’t smoke forever. I know, everyone says that. But, I am actually very serious. Smoking is a past time, a risky and smelly one, but a fun one none the less. I like to think that I look more seductive too. Have you ever seen a movie, where a beautiful girl is sitting in the rain, inhaling deeply from a cigarette and blowing out the smoke? The smoke rises into the air and spins and twirls away towards the bright stars and moon. It is often depicted as a good thing, but I am not encouraging any of you to do it. But, who isn’t a little curious about something they have never done before? I was and I started smoking. Like they say, curiosity killed the cat and that saying shouldn’t be taken lightly. That is my pep talk for the day! By the way, there are so many ways for our lives to end each day and to me, cigarette smoke is that last thing I am thinking about. If I'm having fun and not hurting anyone else, why does it matter? 

Have you ever had a boyfriend or girlfriend? If you have had one, did you ever believe that they were the love of your life and you would be together forever? This actually happens VERY commonly. It is easy to get swept away into the moment and to believe that a person can do no harm to you and will be your perfect soulmate. People can do harm, because no one is perfect. But, if a person loves you they will never cause you harm that can leave a mental or physical scar. My friend though that she had found her soul mate. They had been eachothers first love and they met in middle school. They decided to get married when they were 18. So far, you are probably guessing that I am going to tell you a long drawn out story. You are also guessing that I am going to tell you to refrain from getting married at a young age. I am not here to tell you either of those, I am here to warn you that nothing is as it seems. You can not truly know a person, until you learn to communicate and trust eachother. If you can't communicate, then you can't work out problems or even to express anything effectively, espeically feelings that matter. If you can't be open and honest, you might as well quite now because your going downhill fast. 

Back to my main pont I go. My friend got married at 18, because she thought that marriage would fix all of her problems. They felt as if it would bring them closer together. While she felt that it brought them closer together, he felt as if he was now suffocated by his vow. Her husband was a teenager and he wanted to be one. He wasn't ready to be a husband. He wanted to go "play," with his friends. They couldn't communicate or trust eachother, so slowly...everything fell a part. Something terrible happened to my friends family and it broke us all apart. Her brother, got hit by a car and was badly wounded. He was rushed to the hospital in another city and many time in the first few weeks, the doctors were sure that he would die. In these times of peril, people should stay together and to support eachother. If you have ever been faced with the reality that someone you love dearly will die, you know how essential it is to have a friend, lover, spouse or family member with you to get through the ordeal. My friend needed her husband at that time and one night a month after her brothers accident, she called me at four in the morning, sobbing hysterically. I was sure that something had happened to her brother, but instead she had told me that her husband had left her an hour earlier. He had told her that he wasn't happy, he didn't love her and that he couldn't handle the stress of the whole situaton. Just like that, he left and went to his Moms house. Wow, a stand up guy...dont' you think? 

She had believed that he had been the love of her life. He had vowed to love her always, but instead he left when she needed him most. So, I am warning you to THINK before rushing into anything. You need to make SURE that  you know who you are marrying. You can have NO doubts about the people you want to be involved with, because by the time you figure out that it is too late, you could all ready by hurt beyond repair.

I was at school a few days ago and a classmate of mine told me that she was engaged. I congradulated her and asked how long they had been dating. She told me that they were engaged and had been dating, for 3 MONTHS. Can someone tell me how you can love someone in 3 months, unless it is your child? I am not an expert in all things, but I know that it takes longer than 3 months to dedicate your whole life to a person. Think about it, very hard. To me, marriage is a vow that you will die for your spouse, protect them, love them, do ANYTHING for them, as long as it does not harm you. Love takes time and 3 months isn't enough to be sure. 

Publication Date: 04-09-2013

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Dedication:
To the hero's who fight on and the villains who forgot they were hero's. We define who we will be tomorrow and I want to be the hero who believes that all is possible and not the Villain who believes that all is lost. Hold true to yourself and don't forget. The first step is remembering, but Don't forget yourself in the process.