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his lips were just inches from mine.

“Shit,” he said softly, shaking his head. “I can’t stay away from you.”

I didn’t say anything, afraid that if I said the wrong thing, I’d remind him of what we were doing, remind him that we’d said we couldn’t do this anymore, and he’d get up and leave. And I so desperately wanted him to stay.

I hated him and loved him all at the same time. I wanted him to hold me and had the urge to push him away. It was confusing and thrilling and it made no sense and perfect sense.

His hand cupped my chin. “Do you know how crazy you drive me, walking around in outfits like that?”

“I didn’t pick it out.”

“You are so fucking sexy.”

The pad of his thumb slid over my lower lip, and then slowly, his lips came toward mine. My breath hitched, catching in my chest, my pulse pounding and my heart speeding up.

I wanted him to kiss me more than I’d wanted anything in my life.

“Avery,” he whispered. “God, what are you doing to me?”

He lowered his head toward mine and kissed me gently on the lips. His lips were warm and soft, and when he pulled away, I opened my eyes. The two of us stared at each other in the dark for a moment.

It was the first time he’d kissed me on the lips, and while the other stuff we’d done had been sexual and exciting and had gotten me so horny and turned on I could hardly take it, this was more serious, more romantic, more intimate.

Cole shook his head slightly and then turned away from me, like he was going to leave. Disappointment flooded my body, but a second later, he turned back around, took my face in his hands and kissed me again.

This time, his tongue parted my lips and moved against mine, making it clear who was in control. He kissed me and kissed me and kissed me, harder and deeper, pulling me close until I was pushed up tight against his body. I could feel his cock, hard through his pants, and I tried to keep myself from grinding into him, tried to keep him from knowing how badly I wanted him.

His hands slid up under the back of my tank top, causing a shiver to slide up my back.

“You are so beautiful,” he said. “Do you know how fucking beautiful you are?”

I shook my head no.

“Let me show you,” he rasped, and then his mouth was back on mine, his stubble rubbing against my cheeks and chin as our mouths fell into a sensuous rhythm. It was the best kiss I’d ever had in my life. He knew what he was doing, knew just where to move his tongue, knew just how to hold me close. He tasted like peppermint and he smelled like soap and expensive cologne, and it was a heady combination that made me dizzy. My pussy was wet, and I was afraid if he touched me I was going to come already.

He pulled back and rolled his body on top of mine, and I let my hands wander over his bare chest, lingering on his shoulders, his pecs, his biceps. He was so built that he made me feel tiny, and his hands grabbed my tits as he kissed me, pulling my tank top off and tossing it onto the floor. Then he grabbed my pajama pants and pulled them off, too, until I was lying there in just my panties.

“Fuck,” he said as he gazed down at my nipples. He took one into his mouth, sucking it gently, sending heat through my body. His eyes locked on mine as he sucked, adding to the intensity of having my nipple in my stepbrother’s mouth.

He stopped for minute, just gazing at me as he pushed himself between my legs, forcing my legs apart so that his dick was right against my pussy. He started grinding against me, and I moaned and bit my lip, arching my back. Even though we were separated by his sweatpants my panties, he was getting me dripping wet.

“Does that feel good, baby?” he whispered. “Does my dick feel good against your pussy?”

“Yes,” I moaned. “Fuck, Cole, that feels so good.”

“You want me inside of you, don’t you, baby?”

“Yes,” I moaned, imagining the tip of his hard cock sliding into me, imagining him on top of me, pumping me harder and faster, his balls slapping against my ass until we both came.

But instead of doing that, he stopped.

“Please,” I breathed. “Cole, please don’t stop.”

“Don’t stop what?” he demanded, his eyes bright. He pulled off his pants and boxers, tossing them onto the floor, and I caught a glimpse of his cock, thick and rock hard.

“Don’t stop grinding your cock against me.”

He grinned at me devilishly, then grabbed my hand, like he’d done last night, and slid it over his stomach. I could feel every muscle of his six-pack, every distinct ridge of his gorgeous body as he guided my hand down until I was touching his shaft.

I began to stroke him up and down while he kissed me. After a few minutes, he began kissing down my neck, over my stomach until he was between my legs.

He grabbed the sides of my panties, his thumbs sliding under the waistband before sliding them off and over my ankles. He pushed my legs back apart and then his mouth was on me, nibbling on my thighs, his breath warm against my skin.

I cried out as he reached my center and his tongue swirled over my clit.

“You taste so good, baby,” Cole said, his finger sliding inside of me for a second before his mouth kissed me slow and deep right on my pussy.

chapter three

He dropped my hands like I was on fire and moved away from me, sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

He sat there for a second, then dropped his head into his hands.

I reached out and touched his back. “Cole?”

He stood up and grabbed his clothes, started putting them on.

“Cole?” I said. “I’m sorry, I just… is everything okay?”

“No, everything’s not okay,” he said. “I hurt you.”

“No, it was just… you were just holding me a little too tight, that’s all. It felt good. I wanted you to keep going.” My voice was soft, and I could hear the desperation in my tone. I hated that I wanted him so bad, hated that he had this power over me.

He was pulling his shirt on angrily, pushing his arms through the holes. He stood up and started walking toward the door, and I felt tears starting in my eyes.

He was just leaving me here, in this bed, naked, after he’d taken what he wanted.

“Good,” I called after him. “Good, Cole, just leave. That’s what you do best anyway.”

He came storming back into the room, eyes blazing. “What did you say?”

“I said you’re good at leaving. So go ahead and do it.” I pulled the covers back up over my body. I wanted to get dressed, but I wasn’t going to get up and grab my clothes – it would have given him a full view of me, and there was no way I was going to allow that. He’d seen the last of me naked.

“Stop saying that, Avery,” he warned. “Stop saying I left you.”

“I’ll say whatever I damn well please. You left, and that’s it.” I made sure to keep my tone neutral, the way I’d done every time someone brought up his name, like he meant nothing to me, like I didn’t care he’d left. After a while, I’d started believing it myself. But ever since I’d seen him, it was like the curtain was being lifted and revealing the truth, little by little. And the truth was, I did care. Cole had hurt me more than anyone, ever.

My stepfather was a viper – but I’d never trusted him. Cole had been different. Cole was never supposed to have hurt me. So when he did, the pain had been almost unbearable. Which is why I’d done my best to bury it deep inside.

“Stop fucking saying that,” Cole demanded. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, Avery.”

“I’ll stop saying it when you explain. Oh, that’s right, you can’t.” I didn’t care if I sounded like a brat. I was pissed.

“You want to know why I left, Avery? You really want to know?”

“Yes!”

He walked all the way into the room and stopped at the food of the bed. His eyes locked onto mine, the soft light of the city shining through the windows behind him, illuminating his face and making him look even more gorgeous than he already was. He was so beautiful, so perfect that I almost couldn’t take looking at him.

Tears burned in my eyes again, and I tried my best to blink them away. I wanted to turn back time, turn it back to when we were lying in my bed, the two of us, our arms around each other, our lips pressed together.

“I saw you,” Cole said softly.

“What?”

He sat down on the end of the bed, shook his head and placed his hands together, his elbows resting on his knees. “That night, the night I left. You were… you were coming out of the bathroom after your shower. You were wearing my grey Giants t-shirt and you…you were so beautiful, Avery. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I waited for you to come downstairs, but when you didn’t, I went up to find you.”

I stayed silent, my pulse racing, waiting for him to go on.

“When I got back upstairs, my dad was there. He was standing outside your door. And I knew, I just knew he was there to do something to you, Avery. I grabbed him, pulled him down the stairs and dragged him into the backyard.”

“No.” I shook my head, remembering. “No, that night, the night you left…no one was home. You were out with Jessica McNeal and Gordon and my mom were out drinking.”

“That’s true,” Cole said. “But we all got home around the same time, probably around the time you were finishing up your shower. I almost beat the shit out of him that night, Avery. I punched him three times, and I couldn’t stop. He told me to leave, that if I left, he wouldn’t touch you. He promised me, and I believed him.”

“So you left because you thought it was going to protect me?”

“I wanted to take you with me, I wanted to take you away with me. But then I realized the worst part of the whole thing.”

“What?” I asked softly.

“I was just like him.” He turned and looked at me, and I could see the pain in his eyes, burning deep and bright. “I wanted you, Avery. I wanted to touch you and kiss you. I wanted to be with you.”

I reached out and touched his arm. “I wanted to be with you, too, Cole.”

He

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