The Kenzie Report by Mark Clifton (read after txt) π
Read free book Β«The Kenzie Report by Mark Clifton (read after txt) πΒ» - read online or download for free at americanlibrarybooks.com
- Author: Mark Clifton
Read book online Β«The Kenzie Report by Mark Clifton (read after txt) πΒ». Author - Mark Clifton
Both the Chief and I heard the party walking down the hall and into another wing of the building. I still didn't make a sound. It would never do for the Chief to know he had been observed. After a suitable time, the Chief, also, tiptoed out of the lab, and he was mumbling to himself as I have never seen him mumble before.
everal days later another thing appeared on Kenzie's work bench. This time it was a large rectangular glass aquarium. It was filled with moist earth. Now here was something new in electronics!
We shook our heads. One of the techs, who fancied himself a psychologist, said the boys were suffering from retrogressive dementia. They had gone so far back into childhood, they had to play sand box. The Chief overheard the tech, and spoke up plaintively.
"But I don't see any celluloid spade and bucket," he said. He seemed relieved when we burst out laughing.
His relief didn't last long, however. It changed to more worry when he saw the boys carefully sprinkling bread and meat crumbs over the surface of the sand. Then on top of that they dropped moist bits of cake icing. When Pringle brought down a marigold plant, all covered with aphis, and transplanted it in a corner of the aquarium, the Chief again ran into his office and began to hold his head in his hands.
More days passed. The gadget became a bristling porcupine of test clips. By now the boys had forgotten they were working for the Company and spent practically all their time on the whoozits. The Chief became so fascinated, in a kind of horror-stricken manner, that he did not mention the aquarium to Kenzie at all.
The rest of us also kept away from that side of the lab. Ever since Kenzie had started on the gadget, he had no time for us, or helping us with our problems. If we spoke to him he snapped back at us, until I guess all our noses were out of joint. By the time the aquarium appeared, we were ignoring him and everything he did.
In a few more weeks the aquarium was swarming with ants. It was easy to see their tunnels running up and down the sides of the glass. I will say this for the boys. They set it in a huge pan of water. None of us could legitimately squawk about getting ants mixed up with our anatomy.
The Chief showed he was mixed with disappointment and elation when the boys asked clearance to work nights in the lab. Disappointed since he could no longer stay late and follow the progress; elated because the boys must really be getting hot.
Annual budget time was getting closer, and we could see the wheels going around in his mind. It would be a nice thing if he could deliver the multiwhoozits gadget just before the big fight for appropriations.
As far as we knew, the only interest the General Manager had shown was the time he asked the Chief in the hall how that multiwhoozits was coming along. Even in that question, it was evident Old Rock Jaw was asking out of a rare politeness onlyβthere being no big shots around to impress.
It was doubtful if the G.M. heard the Chief's vague answer, because the old boy was mumbling to himself about rising costs and having to cut down expenses. He waddled on down the hall. He was still mumbling as he went, but both the Chief and I heard one sentence clearly.
"And certain salaries and bonuses will have to be cut."
The Chief turned pale.
So he granted Kenzie's request with alacrityβand hoped he would finish the gadget in time.
For two more weeks the Chief waited patiently, or maybe impatiently. He knew the boys were working every night, because the security police complained about their pinochle game being interrupted to let Kenzie and Pringle in and out.
Both the boys began to get a feverish look in their faces. Their cheeks grew hollow. Their eyes were bloodshot. Their regular work suffered even more. The Chief thought he was being considerate when he lifted some of their work and shoved it over to the rest of us.
We were already sore at the boys and we didn't take it too kindly. Just the same, we didn't let our squawk get beyond the walls of the lab. No use letting that nosy Personnel Department get an excuse to start holding hands, patting on the back, and radiating aid and comfort to all.
Thenβa certain Monday came.
he Chief came in, a little late as usual. Some of the newer guys pretended to be busy, but we were all watching to see what he would do. There is a back door to the Chief's office which he seldom uses and which he always keeps locked. But it opens into the lab wing right at my table. It wasn't my fault, in fiddling around a little with the lock, it came unstuck and the door opened a little so I could hear what went on.
When the Chief came in, both the boys were busy dismantling the gadget. Discouragement and hopelessness were written all over their faces, in the dejected slope of their shoulders, in the lackadaisical movements of their arms. Piece by piece, through the glass partition of his office wall, the Chief watched the gadget being taken apart. Each piece was carefully taken back and placed in stock for re-use.
That alone was enough to create great alarm for their sanity. Imagine a technician putting a piece back to be used over!
Finally the Chief could bear it no longer. He called them into his office. He carefully shut the door, but he didn't notice the back door swung open a little farther. I found it necessary to work close to the crack, and if I turned around, I could get a good view of the entire office.
The Chief waved the boys into chairs across from his desk. He sat down and placed his fingertips together. Even then, I could see his hands were shaking. He leaned forward and asked with careful sympathy in his voice.
"Didn't it work?"
"Yeah," Kenzie answered in a bored voice. "It worked." I was surprised at Kenzie's voice. Usually he talked with the concise enunciation of a professor. Now he sounded like maybe just a good lab tech.
"Then why are you dismantling it?" the Chief asked with a worried frown.
"It wouldn't be good for people to know about it," Pringle burst out.
"I don't understand," the Chief faltered. Then desperately, "Look, fellows. I've given you a lotta leeway. You've sluffed your work something terrible. That's all right to an extent. I've covered for you."
"Thanks, Chief," Kenzie said drily.
"But Old Rockβerβthe General Manager," the Chief complained, "knows I've been working on something. Now what with budgets coming on, and all, I gotta have something to show!"
"You've been working on somethingβ" Pringle exclaimed.
"I mean my department has," the Chief covered himself hastily. "I'm responsible for what goes on in my department, you know. I gotta have some kind of an explanation." He was almost wailing now. "What with budgets coming on, and all."
"Make up your own explanation," Kenzie answered disinterestedly. "It's a cinch you can't give out with the real one."
The Chief began to wheedle. "You two boys know the explanation. Why can't you tell me? This is your Chief who's talking, boys. The one who has always stood by you and covered for you. Remember? You just gotta tell me, boys." I saw Pringle and Kenzie look at one another.
"I guess he's right, Ken," Pringle said. "That is, if he promises never to tell anybody."
"Yeah. I guess so." Kenzie nodded his head in agreement. "We owe him that much for just letting us alone."
The Chief let out a big sigh of relief.
"It's about ants," Kenzie began.
"Now, now, Kenzie boy," the Chief interrupted hurriedly. "Let's stay on the subject, shall we? Let's not get off on that tangent again, Kenzie boy. Shall we?"
"Nuts," Kenzie said.
"But this is about ants, Chief," Pringle answered. Then shrewdly, "But first you gotta promise, Chief."
"All right, I promise," the Chief acceded testily.
"It's about ants," Kenzie repeated stubbornly. The Chief winced, but he held his peace.
"They're intelligent," Kenzie said profoundly, and stopped.
"I know," the Chief prompted. "I know, Kenzie boy. You've been saying that all along."
"I communicated with them," Kenzie said flatly.
"You what?" The Chief's eyes bugged out. I guess mine did too.
"Sure," Kenzie answered. "After a fashion, that is. In their anthers they've got a chitin cell diaphragm. Modified cellular structure. They communicate with a sort of microwave. Roughly you might say it generates and radiates like our brain wave. Roughly, very roughly. This chitin diaphragm picks up the microwave like our ears pick up sound. Roughly, that is."
"But that's wonderful," the Chief glowed. It didn't take much imagination to see him in the General Manager's office explaining how his multiwhoozits gadget worked. Maybe nothing immediately commercial about it, but when the publicity office got hold of itβman, it would mean plenty of free publicity for the Company. And how Old Rock Jaw loved free publicity!
"We tuned in on them," Kenzie was saying. "By putting different kinds of food around, and by making different kinds of disturbances, we worked out a crude sort of vocabulary."
"You didβ" the Chief exclaimed.
"Nothing fancy, you understand," Kenzie belittled his achievement. "But enough so when we broadcast a sugar wave, they came running to the surface to see where it was. When we broadcast a water wave, they rushed to the ant nursery and started carrying eggs to high ground."
"Glory beβ" the Chief breathed. In his eyes there was the vision of world renowned scientists patting him on the back. Maybe even more important, Old Rock Jaw was actually smiling, and telling him he could have unlimited funds in his budget.
"Sure," Kenzie said bitterly. "Sure that was all very fine. Big shots, we were going to be, Pringle and me. First time in history man had talked with an insect. Maybe even get our pictures in the paper, same as if we'd murdered somebody. Fame!"
"Yeah," Pringle chimed in. "First step in learning how to communicate with an alien mind. Nuts!"
"I don't get it," the Chief stammered. "What's wrong with that?"
"Well, we went on perfecting the vocabulary," Kenzie said. "You know. Fining it down. Had the little beggars practically standing on their heads at times with our wave." He grinned at the memory and seemed to shake off some of his lethargy.
"You shoulda been here the night Pringle had them marching in formation." His face fell again.
"We kept on improving the gadget," he said with hangdog attitude. "We still hadn't made direct communication, you understand. Nothing like 'How do you do, Mrs. Ant? This is Kenzie MacKenzie, human, talking.'" Then he sneered at his memory.
"With our microwave we could make them do things. But hell, you can make them run out of the ground by pouring water down their hole. That's not communication! We couldn't seem to contact them directβmake them know we were communicating."
"But you stillβ" the Chief said. He had visions of every home using a gadget to broadcast "keep away" signals to ant pests.
"Our gadget was still crude at that point," Kenzie interrupted. "We fined it down, more and more. That's when we began to pick up the star static."
"Star static?" the Chief faltered.
"He wouldn't know about that," Pringle said, and I could detect contempt in his voice, even if the Chief didn't.
"Sure he would," Kenzie corrected. "Everybody knows about the fifty or so stars that send out continuous radio signals, and how we've been trying for years to unscramble them."
"Why certainly," the Chief said, so positively I knew he hadn't heard of it before.
"Anyway," Kenzie said. "The more we worked out the vocabulary code, the more the star signals began to fit right into it. So we decided to break up the thing, and forget all about ants. Honest Chief, you'll never hear me mention the word again."
"Termites either," Pringle chimed in.
"But I still don't understand," the Chief complained. "It still all sounds marvelous. I just don't understand."
"Draw him a picture," Pringle said disgustedly.
"Okay," Kenzie acceded. "How many years would you say ants have been on earth, Chief?"
"Oh, I don't know," the Chief answered. "Quite a few, I'd say."
"Yeah," Kenzie said drily. "Quite a few. At least a million. Unchanged. A perfect life form with a perfect civilization. So perfect, nature hasn't seen any need to change them for a million years."
"So what?" the Chief asked. "They're nothing. We come along and make them do nip ups."
"Yeah," Kenzie was bitter again. "We humans
Comments (0)