The Cloister and the Hearth by Charles Reade (most interesting books to read .TXT) 📕

or even an old woman like me, all was gold to him: and there a sat glowering; oh, you foolish, foolish man! Now you still turned to the speaker, her or him, and that is common sense.”

Denys burst into a hoarse laugh. “You never were more out. Why, this silky, smooth-faced companion is a very Turk—all but his beard. He is what d'ye call 'em oser than ere an archer in the Duke's body-guard. He is more wrapped up in one single Dutch lass called Margaret, than I am in the whole bundle of ye, brown and fair.”

“Man alive, that is just the contrary,” said the hostess. “Yourn is the bane, and hisn the cure. Cling you still to Margaret, my dear. I hope she is an honest girl.”

“Dame, she is an angel.”

“Ay, ay, they are all that till better acquainted. I'd as lieve have her no more than honest, and then she will serve to keep you out of worse company. As for you, soldier, there is trouble in store for you. Your eyes were never made for the good of your soul.”

“Nor of his pouch either,” said Marion, striking in, “and his lips, they will sip the dew, as he calls it, off many a bramble bush.”

“Overmuch clack! Marion overmuch clack.”

“Ods bodikins, mistress; ye didn't hire me to be one o' your three fishes, did ye?” and Marion sulked thirty seconds.

“Is that the way to speak to our mistress?” remonstrated the landlord, who had slipped in.

“Hold your whisht,” said his wife sharply; “it is not your business to check the girl; she is a good servant to you.”

“What, is the cock never to crow, and the hens at it all day?”

“You can crow as loud as you like, my man out o' doors. But the hen means to rule the roost.”

“I know a byword to that tune.” said Gerard.

“Do ye, now? out wi't then.”

“Femme veut en toute saison, Estre dame en sa mason.”

“I never heard it afore; but 'tis as sooth as gospel. Ay, they that set these bywords a rolling had eyes and tongues, and tongues and eyes. Before all the world give me an old saw.”

“And me a young husband,” said Marion. “Now there was a chance for you all, and nobody spoke. Oh! it is too late now, I've changed my mind.”

“All the better for some poor fellow,” suggested Denys.

And now the arrival of the young mistress, or, as she was called, the little mistress, was the signal for them all to draw round the fire, like one happy family, travellers, host, hostess, and even servants in the outer ring, and tell stories till bedtime. And Gerard in his turn told a tremendous one out of his repertory, a MS. collection of “acts of the saints,” and made them all shudder deliciously; but soon after began to nod, exhausted by the effort, I should say. The young mistress saw, and gave Marion a look. She instantly lighted a rush, and laying her hand on Gerard's shoulder, invited him to follow her. She showed him a room where were two nice white beds, and bade him choose.

“Either is paradise,” said he. “I'll take this one. Do you know, I have not lain in a naked bed once since I left my home in Holland.”

“Alack! poor soul!” said she; “well, then, the sooner my flax and your down (he! he!) come together, the better; so—allons!” and she held out her cheek as business-like as if it had been her hand for a fee.

“Allons? what does that mean?”

“It means 'good-night.' Ahem! What, don't they salute the chambermaid in your part?”

“Not all in a moment.”

“What, do they make a business on't?”

“Nay, perverter of words, I mean we make not so free with strange women.

“They must be strange women if they do not think you strange fools, then. Here is a coil. Why, all the old greasy greybeards that lie at our inn do kiss us chambermaids; faugh! and what have we poor wretches to set on t'other side the compt but now and then a nice young——? Alack! time flies, chambermaids can't be spared long in the nursery, so how is't to be?”

“An't please you arrange with my comrade for both. He is mulierose; I am not.”

“Nay, 'tis the curb he will want, not the spur. Well! well! you shall to bed without paying the usual toll; and oh, but 'tis sweet to fall in with a young man who can withstand these ancient ill customs, and gainsay brazen hussies. Shalt have thy reward.”

“Thank you! But what are you doing with my bed?”

“Me? oh, only taking off these sheets, and going to put on the pair the drunken miller slept in last night.”

“Oh, no! no! You cruel, black-hearted thing! There! there!”

“A la bonne heure! What will not perseverance effect? But note now the frowardness of a mad wench! I cared not for't a button. I am dead sick of that sport this five years. But you denied me; so then forthwith I behoved to have it; belike had gone through fire and water for't. Alas, young sir, we women are kittle cattle; poor perverse toads: excuse us: and keep us in our place, savoir, at arm's length; and so good-night!”

At the door she turned and said, with a complete change of tone and manner: “The Virgin guard thy head, and the holy Evangelists watch the bed where lies a poor young wanderer far from home! Amen!”

And the next moment he heard her run tearing down the stairs, and soon a peal of laughter from the salle betrayed her whereabouts.

“Now that is a character,” said Gerard profoundly, and yawned over the discovery.

In a very few minutes he was in a dry bath of cold, clean linen, inexpressibly refreshing to him after so long disuse: then came a delicious glow; and then—Sevenbergen.

In the morning Gerard awoke infinitely refreshed, and was for rising, but found himself a close prisoner. His linen had vanished. Now this was paralysis; for the nightgown is a recent institution. In Gerard's century, and indeed long after, men did not play fast and loose with clean sheets (when they could get them), but crept into them clothed with their innocence, like Adam: out of bed they seem to have taken most after his eldest son.

Gerard bewailed his captivity to Denys; but that instant the door opened, and in sailed Marion with their linen, newly washed and ironed, on her two arms, and set it down on the table.

“Oh you good girl,” cried Gerard.

“Alack, have you found me out at last?”

“Yes,