The Vicomte De Bragelonne by Alexandre Dumas (each kindness read aloud TXT) π
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- Author: Alexandre Dumas
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"Yes, as you might have done; but he did even better than that, M. Colbert."
"And what did he do?"
"He politely counted me down the sum-total, saying, that for the king, his coffers were always full."
"The sum-total! M. Fouquet has given you twenty thousand livres instead of five thousand?"
"Yes, monsieur."
"And what for?"
"In order to spare me three visits to the money-chest of the superintendent, so that I have the twenty thousand livres in my pocket in good new coin. You see, then, that I am able to go away without standing in need of you, having come here only for form's sake." And D'Artagnan slapped his hand upon his pocket, with a laugh which disclosed to Colbert thirty-two magnificent teeth, as white as teeth of twenty-five years old, and which seemed to say in their language: "Serve up to us thirty-two little Colberts, and we will chew them willingly." The serpent is as brave as the lion, the hawk as courageous as the eagle, that cannot be contested. It can only be said of animals that are decidedly cowardly, and are so called, that they will be brave only when they have to defend themselves. Colbert was not frightened at the thirty-two teeth of D'Artagnan. He recovered, and suddenly,--"Monsieur," said he, "monsieur le surintendant has done what he had no right to do."
"What do you mean by that?" replied D'Artagnan.
"I mean that your note--will you let me see your note, if you please?"
"Very willingly; here it is."
Colbert seized the paper with an eagerness which the musketeer did not remark without uneasiness, and particularly without a certain degree of regret at having trusted him with it. "Well, monsieur, the royal order says thus:--'At sight, I command that there be paid to M. d'Artagnan the sum of five thousand livres, forming a quarter of the pension I have made him.'"
"So, in fact, it is written," said D'Artagnan, affecting calmness.
"Very well; the king only owed you five thousand livres; why has more been given to you?"
"Because there was more; and M. Fouquet was willing to give me more; that does not concern anybody."
"It is natural," said Colbert with a proud ease, "that you should be ignorant of the usages of state-finance; but, monsieur, when you have a thousand livres to pay, what do you do?"
"I never have a thousand livres to pay," replied D'Artagnan.
"Once more," said Colbert, irritated--"once more, if you had any sum to pay, would you not pay what you ought?"
"That only proves one thing," said D'Artagnan; "and that is, that you have your own particular customs in finance, and M. Fouquet has his own."
"Mine, monsieur, are the correct ones."
"I do not say that they are not."
"And you have accepted what was not due to you."
D'Artagnan's eyes flashed. "What is not due to me yet, you meant to say, M. Colbert; for if I have received what was not due to me at all, I should have committed a theft."
Colbert made no reply to this subtlety. "You then owe fifteen thousand livres to the public chest," said he, carried away by his jealous ardor.
"Then you must give me credit for them," replied D'Artagnan, with his imperceptible irony.
"Not at all, monsieur."
"Well! what will you do, then? You will not take my rouleaux from me, will you?"
"You must return them to my chest."
"I! Oh! Monsieur Colbert, don't reckon upon that."
"The king wants his money, monsieur."
"And I, monsieur, I want the king's money."
"That may be so; but you must return this."
"Not a sou. I have always understood that in matters of comptabilite, as you call it, a good cashier never gives back or takes back."
"Then, monsieur, we shall see what the king will say about it. I will show him this note, which proves that M. Fouquet not only pays what he does not owe, but that he does not even take care of vouchers for the sums that he has paid."
"Ah! now I understand why you have taken that paper, M. Colbert!"
Colbert did not perceive all that there was of a threatening character in his name pronounced in a certain manner. "You shall see hereafter what use I will make of it," said he, holding up the paper in his fingers.
"Oh!" said D'Artagnan, snatching the paper from him with a rapid movement; "I understand perfectly well, M. Colbert; I have no occasion to wait for that." And he crumpled up the paper he had so cleverly seized.
"Monsieur, monsieur!" cried Colbert, "this is violence!"
"Nonsense! You must not be particular about a soldier's manners!" replied D'Artagnan. "I kiss your hands, my dear M. Colbert." And he went out, laughing in the face of the future minister.
"That man, now," muttered he, "was about to grow quite friendly; it is a great pity I was obliged to cut his company so soon."
For a man who had seen so many much more dangerous ones, the position of D'Artagnan with respect to M. Colbert was only comic. D'Artagnan, therefore, did not deny himself the satisfaction of laughing at the expense of monsieur l'intendant, from the Rue des Petits-Champs to the Rue des Lombards. It was a great while since D'Artagnan had laughed so long together. He was still laughing when Planchet appeared, laughing likewise, at the door of his house; for Planchet, since the return of his patron, since the entrance of the English guineas, passed the greater part of his life in doing what D'Artagnan had only done from the Rue Neuve des Petits-Champs to the Rue des Lombards.
"You are home, then, my dear master?" said Planchet.
"No, my friend," replied the musketeer; "I am off, and that quickly. I will sup with you, go to bed, sleep five hours, and at break of day leap into my saddle. Has my horse had an extra feed?"
"Eh! my dear master," replied Planchet, "you know very well that your horse is the jewel of the family; that my lads are caressing it all day, and cramming it with sugar, nuts, and biscuits. You ask me if he has had an extra feed of oats; you should ask if he has not had enough to burst him."
"Very well, Planchet, that is all right. Now, then, I pass to what concerns me--my supper?"
"Ready. A smoking roast joint, white wine, crayfish, and fresh-gathered cherries. All ready, my master."
"You are a capital fellow, Planchet; come on, then, let us sup, and I will go to bed."
During supper D'Artagnan observed that Planchet kept rubbing his forehead, as if to facilitate the issue of some idea closely pent within his brain. He looked with an air of kindness at this worthy companion of former adventures and misadventures, and, clinking glass against glass, "Come, Planchet," said he, "let us see what it is that gives you so much trouble to bring forth. Mordioux! Speak freely, and quickly."
"Well, this is it," replied Planchet: "you appear to me to be going on some expedition or another."
"I don't say that I am not."
"Then you have some new idea?"
"That is possible, too, Planchet."
"Then there will be fresh capital to be ventured? I will lay down fifty thousand livres upon the idea you are about to carry out." And so saying, Planchet rubbed his hands one against the other with a rapidity evincing great delight.
"Planchet," said D'Artagnan, "there is but one misfortune in it."
"And what is that?"
"That the idea is not mine. I can risk nothing upon it."
These words drew a deep sigh from the heart of Planchet. That Avarice is an ardent counselor; she carries away her man, as Satan did Jesus, to the mountain, and when once she has shown to an unfortunate all the kingdoms of the earth, she is able to repose herself, knowing full well that she has left her companion, Envy, to gnaw at his heart. Planchet had tasted of riches easily acquired, and was never afterwards likely to stop in his desires; but, as he had a good heart in spite of his covetousness, as he adored D'Artagnan, he could not refrain from making him a thousand recommendations, each more affectionate than the others. He would not have been sorry, nevertheless, to have caught a little hint of the secret his master concealed so well; tricks, turns, counsels, and traps were all useless, D'Artagnan let nothing confidential escape him. The evening passed thus. After supper the portmanteau occupied D'Artagnan, he took a turn to the stable, patted his horse, and examined his shoes and legs; then, having counted over his money, he went to bed, sleeping as if only twenty, because he had neither inquietude nor remorse; he closed his eyes five minutes after he had blown out his lamp. Many events might, however, have kept him awake. Thought boiled in his brain, conjectures abounded, and D'Artagnan was a great drawer of horoscopes; but, with that imperturbable phlegm which does more than genius for the fortune and happiness of men of action, he put off reflection till the next day, for fear, he said, not to be fresh when he wanted to be so.
The day came. The Rue des Lombards had its share of the caresses of Aurora with the rosy fingers, and D'Artagnan arose like Aurora. He did not awaken anybody, he placed his portmanteau under his arm, descended the stairs without making one of them creak, and without disturbing one of the sonorous snorings in every story from the garret to the cellar, then, having saddled his horse, shut the stable and house doors, he set off, at a foot-pace, on his expedition to Bretagne. He had done quite right not to trouble himself with all the political and diplomatic affairs which solicited his attention; for, in the morning, in freshness and mild twilight, his ideas developed themselves in purity and abundance. In the first place, he passed before the house of Fouquet, and threw in a large gaping box the fortunate order which, the evening before, he had had so much trouble to recover from the hooked fingers of the intendant. Placed in an envelope, and addressed to Fouquet, it had not even been divined by Planchet, who in divination was equal to Calchas or the Pythian Apollo. D'Artagnan thus sent back the order to Fouquet, without compromising himself, and without having thenceforward any reproaches to make himself. When he had effected this proper restitution, "Now," he said to himself, "let us inhale much maternal air, much freedom from cares, much health, let us allow the horse Zephyr, whose flanks puff as if he had to respire an atmosphere, to breathe, and let us be very ingenious in our little calculations. It is time," said D'Artagnan, "to form a plan of the campaign, and, according to the method of M. Turenne, who has a large head full of all sorts of good counsels, before the plan of the campaign it is advisable to draw a striking portrait of the generals to whom we are opposed. In the first place, M. Fouquet presents himself. What is M. Fouquet? M. Fouquet," replied D'Artagnan to himself, "is a handsome man, very much beloved by the women, a generous man very much beloved by the poets; a man of wit, much execrated by pretenders. Well, now I am neither woman, poet, nor pretender: I neither love not hate monsieur le surintendant. I find myself, therefore, in the same position in which M. Turenne found himself when opposed to the Prince de Conde at Jargeau, Gien and the Faubourg Saint-Antoine. He did not execrate monsieur le prince, it is
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