Samantha at Saratoga by Marietta Holley (online e book reader TXT) đź“•
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- Author: Marietta Holley
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But at that very minute I heard a noise outside the door, and I heard that beloved voice a sayin’ in low axents the words I had so often heard him speak, words I had oft rebuked him for, but now, so weak will human love make one, now, I welcome them gladly—they sounded exquisitely sweet to me. The words wuz, “Dumb ’em!”
And I joyfully opened the door. But oh! what a sight met my eye. There stood Josiah Allen, arrayed in a blanket he had took from our bed (that accounted for my cold feelin’ in my dream). The blanket wuz white, with a gay border of red and yellow. He had fixed it onto him in a sort of a dressy way, and strapped it round the waist with my shawl strap. And he had took a bright yeller silk handkerchief of hisen, and had wrapped it round his head so’s it hung down some like a cap, and he wuz a tryin’ to fasten it round his forward with one of my stockin’ supporters. He couldn’t buckle it, and that is what called forth his exclamations. At his feet, partly upon the stairs, wuz the bolster from our bed (that accounted for the log that had gin way). And he had spread a little red shawl of mine over the top on’t, and as I opened the door he wuz jest ready to embark on the bolster, he waz jest a steppin’ onto it. But as he see me he paused, and I sez in low axents, “What are you a goin’ to do, Josiah Allen?”
“I’m a goin’ to Toboggen,” sez he.
Sez I, “Do you stop at once, and come back into your room.”
“No, no!” sez he firmly, and preparin’ to embark on the bolster, “I am a goin’ to Toboggen. And you come and go to. It is so fashionable,” sez he, “such a genteel diversion.”
Sez I, “Do you stop it at once, and come back to your room. Why,” sez I, “the hull house will be routed up, and be up here in a minute.”
“Wall,” sez he, “they’ll see fun if they do and fashion. I am a goin’, Samantha!” and be stepped forward.
Sez I, “They’ll see sunthin’ else that begins with a f, but it haint fun or fashion.’ And agin I sez, “Do you come back, Josiah Allen. You’ll break your neck and rout up the house, and be called a fool.”
“Oh no, Samantha! I must Toboggen. I must go down the slide once.” And he fixed the bolster more firmly on the top stair.
“Wall,” sez I, feelin’ that I wuz drove to my last ambush by him, sez I, “probably five dollars won’t make the expenses good, besides your doctor’s bill, and my mornin’. And I shall put on the deepest of crape, Josiah Allen,” sez I.
I see he wavered and I pressed the charge home. Sez I, “That bolster is thin cloth, Josiah Allen, and you’ll probably have to pay now for draggin’ it all over the floor. If anybody should see you with it there, that bolster would be charged in your bill. And how would it look to the neighbors to have a bolster charged in your bill? And I should treasure it, Josiah Allen, as bein’ the last bill you made before you broke your neck !”
“Oh, wall,” sez he, “I s’pose I can put the bolster back.” But he wuz snappish, and he kep’ snappish all day.
He wuzn’t quelled. Though he had gin in for the time bein’ I see he wuzn’t quelled down. He acted dissatisfied and highheaded, and I felt worried in my mind, not knowin’ what his next move would be.
Oh! the tribulations it makes a woman to take care of a man. But then it pays. After all, in the deepest of my tribulations I feel, I do the most of the time feel, that it pays. When he is good he is dretful good.
Wall, I went over to see Polly Pixley the next night, and when I got back to my room, there stood Josiah Allen with both of his feet sort a bandaged and tied down onto sumthin’, which I didn’t at first recognize. It waz big and sort a egg shaped, and open worked, and both his feet wuz strapped down tight onto it, and he wuz a pushin’ himself round the room with his umberell.
And I sez, “What is the matter now, Josiah Allen; what are you a doin’ now?”
“Oh I am a walkin’ on snow-shoes, Samantha! But I don’t see,” sez he a stoppin’ to rest, for he seemed tuckered out, “I don’t see how the savages got round as they did and performed such journeys. You put ’em on, Samantha,” sez he, “and see if you can get on any faster in ’em.”
Sez I, coldly, “The savages probable did’nt have both feet on one shoe, Josiah Allen, as you have. I shall put on no snowshoes in the middle of July; but if I did, I should put ’em on accordin’ to a little mite of sense. I should try to use as much sense as a savage any way.”
“Why, how it would look to have one foot on that great big snow-shoe. I always did like a good close fit in my shoes. And you see I have room enough and to spare for both on ’em on this. Why it wouldn’t look dressy at all, Samantha, to put ’em on as you say.”
Sez I very coldly, “I don’t see anything over and above dressy in your looks now, Josiah Allen, with both of your feet tied down onto that one shoe, and you a tryin’ to move off when you can’t. I can’t see anything over and above ornamental in it, Josiah Allen.”
“Oh! you are never willin’ to give in that I look dressy, Samantha. But I s’pose I can put my feet where you say. You are so sot, but they are too big for me—I shall look like a fool.”
I looked at him calmly over my specks, and sez I, “I guess I sha’n’t notice the difference or realize the change. I wonder,” sez I, in middlin’ cold axents, “how you think you are a lookin’ now, Josiah Allen.”
“Oh! keep a naggin’ at me!” sez he. But I see he wuz a gittin’ kinder sick of the idee.
“What you mean by puttin’ ’em on at all is more than I can say,” sez I, “a tryin to walk on snowshoes right in dog-days.”
“I put ’em on,” Samantha, sez he, a beginnin’ to unstrap ’em, “I put ’em on because I wanted to feel like a savage.”
“Wall,” sez I, “I have seen you at times durin’ the last 20 years, when I thought you realized how they felt without snow-shoes on, either.”
(These little interchanges of confidence will take place in every-day life.) But at that very minute Ardelia Tutt rapped at the door, and Josiah hustled them snow-shoes into the closet, and that wuz the last trial I had with him about ’em. He had borrowed ’em.
Wall, Ardelia wuz dretful pensive, and soft actin’ that night, she seemed real tickled to see us, and to get where we wuz. She haint over and above suited with the boardin’ place where she is, I think. I don’t believe they have very good food, though she won’t complain, bein’ as they are relations on her own side. And then she is sech a good little creeter anyway. But I had my suspicions. She didn’t seem very happy. She said she had been down to the park that afternoon, she and the young chap that has been a payin’ her so much attention lately, Bial Flamburg. She said they had sot down there by the deer park most all the afternoon a watchin’ the deer. She spoke dretful well of the deer. And they are likely deer for anything I know. But she seemed sort a pensive and low spirited. Mebby she is a beginnin’ to find Bial Flamburg out. Mebby she is a beginnin’ to not like his ways. He drinks and smokes, that I know, and I’ve mistrusted worse things on him. Before Ardelia went away, she slipped the followin’ lines into my hand, which I read after she had left. They wuz rather melancholy and ran as follows:
“STANZAS WROTH ON A DEER IN CENTRAL PARK.
“BY ARDELIA TUTT.
“Oh deer, sweet deer that softly steppeth out
From out thy rustick cot beneath the hill;
We would not meet thee with a wild, wild shout,
But with the low voice, low and sweet, and still
As anything.
“And in thine ear would whisper thoughts that swell
Our bosom nigh beyond our corset’s bound;
As lo! we see thee step along the dell
And with thy horns, and eyes look all around
And up, and down.
“We think of all thy virtue, and thy ways,
Thy simple ways of eating hay and grass;
We would not cause thy cheek to blush with praise,
Yet we have marked thee, marked thee as thou pass
We could but fain.
“And lo! our admiration thou dost win
Thou in the haunts of fashion keep afar,
Thou dost not lo! imbibe vile beer or gin,
Or smoke with pipe, or with a bad cigar,
Or cigarette.
“Thou dost not flirt nor cast sheep eyes on her
Who is bound unto another by a vow—
Thou dost not murmur love words in her ear,
While husband’s prowl about, to make a row
Or shoot with gun.
“Thou dost not drive in tandem, or on high—
In stately loneliness, in Tally Ho go round,
Thou dost not on a horse back nobly canter by,
Or drive in dog carts up and down the land,
By day or night.
“For ice cream, or for custard pie thou hankerest not,
Yearn not for caramels, nor apple sass,
Thou dost not eat pop corn, or peanuts down the grot,
Ah! no, sweet deer, thou meekly eatest grass
In peace.
“A lesson man might learn of thee full well,
To eat with sweet content tough steak, or thin;
Cold toast, or hot imbibe, think of that dell—
That patient deer, and eat in peace, nor sin
With profane word.
“If waiters do not come with food, think on that deer,
If food be bad and cold, think on that dell,
Strike not for vengeance with a deadly spear,
Learn of that angel deer and murmur, all is well,
While eating grass.”
LAKE GEORGE AND MOUNT McGREGOR.
It wuz on a nice pleasant day that Ardelia Tuit, Josiah Allen, and me, met by previous agreement quite early in the mornin’, A. M., and sot out for Lake George. It is so nigh, that you can step onto the cars, and go out and see George any time of day.
It seemed to me jest as if George wuz glad we had come, for there wuz a broad happy smile all over his face, and a sort of a dimplin’ look, as if he wanted to laugh right out. All the beckonin’ shores and islands, with their beautiful houses on ’em, and the distant forests, and the trees a bendin’ over George, all seemed to sort a smile out a welcome to us. We had a most beautiful day, and got back quite late in the afternoon, P. M.
And the next day, a day heavenly calm and fair, Josiah Allen and me sot sail for Mount McGregor—that mountain top that is lifted up higher in the hearts of Americans than any other peak on the continent—fur higher. For it is the place where the memory of a Hero lays over all the peaceful landscape like a inspiration and a benediction, and will rest there forever.
The railroad winds round and round the mountain sometimes not seemin’ly goin’ up at all, but gradually a movin’ in’ on towards the top, jest as this brave Hero did in his career. If some of the time he didn’t seem to move on, or if some of the time he seemed to go back for a little, yet there wuz a deathless fire inside on him, a power, a strength that kep’ him a goin’ up, up, up, and drawin’ the nation up with him onto the safe level ground of Victory.
We got
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