a pirates field trip by ray rebmann (bill gates book recommendations txt) 📕
Excerpt from the book:
a class field trip to the museum to see a pirate's exhibit becomes a real journey to Treasure Island
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- Author: ray rebmann
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scream but held back, not wishing to show the
others he was afraid.
As the flares faded, the skeleton took on a fleshy appearance and changed into a full
blooded pirate.
“Cool, man.” Dewey shouted, thinking this was part of the exhibit and the pirate was an
employee in costume.
Figuring they were being included in some planned routine, the boys turned around to see
what tricks the curator would perform as her part of the stunt but just like that, she had been tied
by ropes around the arms and legs.
“We’ve got her now laddies. Is it the plank for her or shall we just indulge in a little
Field Trip Pirates--66
keelhaulin’”
What’s with this planks and keelhaulin’ stuff? Huey wondered.
The boys still didn’t know what keelhauling was but coming from this guy it sure
sounded like something nasty. And as long as it was going to happen to somebody else, it might
be fun. They suddenly felt like they were real pirates.
This field trip is okay, each thought as they grinned at one another. This pirate
guy’s all right for a grown-up.
The boys watched as the pirate paraded across the deck toward them, showing off
his brass coat buttons and belt buckle, the belt itself bulging with pistols that looked more like
antique water squirters than real guns but that sword, a “cutlass” he called it, was sure real
enough and sharp too.
“Three smart lads, smart as paint. I could see it right off from the affidavy your school
sent ahead announcing you was comin’” the pirate said sweetly.
He told the boys he’d hand picked them for his crew because they had showed
Themselves to be true “gentlemen of fortune”
His evidence? He read from some papers he pulled out of that frilly shirt of his.
Huey had never obeyed an authority figure unless threatened with punishment. All three
boys had records that reeked of laziness, selfishness, greediness, and complete ignorance. And
they were cowardly bullies who were brave only in the safety of numbers.
The three musketeers beamed proudly as the pirate read off their particular qualities.
“And as soon as we get this here scow turned about and headed out to that ocean.” The
pirate said, pointing at a three dimensional hologram of the sea that served as back ground along
Field Trip Pirates --67
the far wall of the exhibit.
“We’ll head to the island and find the treasure.”
It seemed like the whole exhibit filled with flashes of lightning and in the distance deep
within the hologram, crashing thunder. Waves breaking on a distant beach!
The pirate hollered about jibs and mainsails and halyards and booms but the boys didn’t
understand a word of it. Louis was nearly knocked overboard when the ship “turned about” and a
sail spun flying toward his head, just missing.
“Shipmates! The island’s just the place for lads like yerselves.” The pirate roared. “You
can swim all day, climb trees like the monkeys and eat coconuts, hunt like lions and cook slabs
of fresh killed meat on a roaring fire each and every day and night for the rest of your
natural lives.”
The man had a way about him that thrilled the three musketeers. Each boy saw something
familiar in the face and swagger of the pirate.
Dewey saw his favorite rock star. The one with the long straggly black hair and the dark
eye make-up, his cheeks bright red as though smeared with the blood of his victims. Dewey
bobbed his head to some imaginary rhythm as the pirate pranced across a stage inside Dewey’s
little brain, bouncing to the pulse of a heavy bass guitar and tribal drum beat.
Singing about keelhauling everything. School, home, family, the kid down the block who
beat Dewey up last summer. Anything and anybody that bothered Dewey, this guy could do in
with a song.
Louis wasn’t sure who he saw. Maybe one of the big tough kids who hung out in the
parking lot of the 7-11. Kids he admired but secretly feared. To get over his fear, he tried to
Field Trip Pirates--68
act like them.
Smoking cigarettes. Shoplifting at the drug store. Keying the entire side of the car he
thinks belonged to the old grouch up the street who snitched to his mom about how he broke
someone’s window one day he was caught throwing rocks .
Louis was just having fun and besides, it was an accident. Maybe it wasn’t him.
Maybe it was Huey. Yeah, it was Huey…He’d been throwing rocks too.
Instead of the way grown-ups always blamed him no matter what he did, it would
be a life of not being blamed for everything that goes wrong,
That’s what Louis heard
Huey couldn’t figure out why he was so impressed with the pirate. All he saw was his
dad.
But it was a new improved dad. Flashier. More stylish and sinister in whatever he was
doing.Huey had always been especially impressed with the way his dad could weasel his way out
of any problem. Do whatever it took. Lie, cheat, steal. Run away.
It didn’t matter who was hurt just so long as he got what he wanted out of it.
That’s why Huey didn’t sweat his father not being around. He knew the old man was
taking care of business.
Besides, mom so busy working, Huey was able to get away with more stuff.
Huey had a simple outlook on life. All adults were the same. All adults are assholes.
Huey’s solution: he was never going to grow up. No job, no family. No responsibilities.
If he couldn’t be a carefree fun loving musketeer, he figured he’d get himself lost.
That’s what Huey heard: Huey, the grown up getting away with stuff.
* * *
Field Trip Pirates--69
The ship starting acting peculiar. It didn’t just rock and roll from side to side the way it
did when the boys first climbed aboard. Now, it broke away from the restraints holding it in
place. The ship began rising and falling as if riding in a squall. Waves broke over the side.
There was thunder overhead and gulls flying around squealing.
Huey went to pull up the hood on his sweatshirt when he realized he wasn’t wearing his
smelly old Dallas Cowboys jersey. Instead, he was wearing a sissy red satin coat with shiny
buttons and big floppy sleeves like the ones those guys wearing the white wigs wore in the
pictures in that fat Social Studies book he looked at one time when the cable was out and there
was nothing else to do.
His sneakers were gone, too, replaced by these heavy clodhopper boots.
And his backwards baseball cap was gone. His head was covered by a red bandana that
smelled like fish or something worse.
He looked over at Louis and Dewey and saw they were dressed the same way, like
midget captain Hooks.
“Dude you look ridiculous.” One said to the other.
“Dude, I banged my head against the cement wall a few times when we were running
through here. I know I cracked the cement but did I crack something in my head too?”
“No me bucks. Your heads are fine and your eyes are seeing what they are meant to see.
For three such as ye were so meant for the life of the sea that you’ve been impressed for me
crew. Make sail.”
When the boys stood dumbfounded, they felt the crack of a whip. It stung each of them.
“Make sail. I said.”
Field Trip Pirates--70
“What are you talking about mister. I’m not impressed. I’m just a kid.” Louis whined,
then showing there was no honor among bad boys he squealed on his mates. “Besides, this was
all Huey’s idea. He’s the one who wanted to do the keelhaulin’.”
“I said, make sail.” The pirate growled and the boys heard a pistol fire.
Louis started bawling. Dewey ran from one end of the ship to the other then back.
“What are we gonna do. What are we gonna do.” He kept crying again and again.
Huey, being slightly smarter than his pals, tried to think. It was too difficult. His brain
was way too much out of practice. He looked into the shadows away from the smoke coming
from the pistol.
Suddenly, lightning flashed and he saw someone fighting with a gang of raging
buccaneers…
“Mr. J!”
* * *
Field Trip Pirates--71
Mr. J reached around in the dark for his pouch. The living manikins had confirmed his
suspicions. He had quietly followed the pair of manikins from the tavern exhibit.
He squeezed behind the wall and slid along until he reached a trap door. He
forced open the door and entered a small room. The room contained several computers and
stereo equipment, concealed wires ran in all directions with some cleverly hidden thick cables
leading under a second trap door that opened onto a long dark corridor.
“Stage lighting. A Virtual reality simulator.” He’d heard of such a thing from his son, the
computer expert but had never really paid much attention thinking that nothing could beat
applying good old fashioned human imagination to tinker with “real” reality. These sophisticated
gadgets seemed out of place in a pirate exhibit.
But then, there are pirates and there are pirates.
The manikins had gone somewhere beyond that dark corridor. He could tell by the
agitated way the rats scurried about, like they were deserting a sinking ship…
He heard noises coming from the end of the corridor. Must be another room, he
thought, as he fumbled about in his pouch, hoping he’d picked the right card. He paused with
several in hand but it was so dark, he couldn’t make out the inscription.
“Here goes.” He finally said, picking one and returning the others to the pouch.
Which card had he grabbed? He felt himself growing stronger and ready for battle.
Maybe it was the ‘Ace’ card?
That one read:
‘Achilles, part man, part Greek mythological god.
Crazed brawling a specialty. Superhuman acts of bravery on request.
Available for television wrestling, parent teacher conferences
and income tax audits.”
Field Trip Pirates--72
Or had he pulled the one he’d wanted. That one read:
Baker Street Irregular
“No mystery too complicated. No clue too insignificant.
Dashing debonair sword fights a specialty.
Nick of time rescues and happy endings in every mystery”
Available for finding missing homework, wayward parents, hounds lost on moors.
Somehow, the two cards had gotten stuck together. Once he finished with this field trip,
he’d have to
others he was afraid.
As the flares faded, the skeleton took on a fleshy appearance and changed into a full
blooded pirate.
“Cool, man.” Dewey shouted, thinking this was part of the exhibit and the pirate was an
employee in costume.
Figuring they were being included in some planned routine, the boys turned around to see
what tricks the curator would perform as her part of the stunt but just like that, she had been tied
by ropes around the arms and legs.
“We’ve got her now laddies. Is it the plank for her or shall we just indulge in a little
Field Trip Pirates--66
keelhaulin’”
What’s with this planks and keelhaulin’ stuff? Huey wondered.
The boys still didn’t know what keelhauling was but coming from this guy it sure
sounded like something nasty. And as long as it was going to happen to somebody else, it might
be fun. They suddenly felt like they were real pirates.
This field trip is okay, each thought as they grinned at one another. This pirate
guy’s all right for a grown-up.
The boys watched as the pirate paraded across the deck toward them, showing off
his brass coat buttons and belt buckle, the belt itself bulging with pistols that looked more like
antique water squirters than real guns but that sword, a “cutlass” he called it, was sure real
enough and sharp too.
“Three smart lads, smart as paint. I could see it right off from the affidavy your school
sent ahead announcing you was comin’” the pirate said sweetly.
He told the boys he’d hand picked them for his crew because they had showed
Themselves to be true “gentlemen of fortune”
His evidence? He read from some papers he pulled out of that frilly shirt of his.
Huey had never obeyed an authority figure unless threatened with punishment. All three
boys had records that reeked of laziness, selfishness, greediness, and complete ignorance. And
they were cowardly bullies who were brave only in the safety of numbers.
The three musketeers beamed proudly as the pirate read off their particular qualities.
“And as soon as we get this here scow turned about and headed out to that ocean.” The
pirate said, pointing at a three dimensional hologram of the sea that served as back ground along
Field Trip Pirates --67
the far wall of the exhibit.
“We’ll head to the island and find the treasure.”
It seemed like the whole exhibit filled with flashes of lightning and in the distance deep
within the hologram, crashing thunder. Waves breaking on a distant beach!
The pirate hollered about jibs and mainsails and halyards and booms but the boys didn’t
understand a word of it. Louis was nearly knocked overboard when the ship “turned about” and a
sail spun flying toward his head, just missing.
“Shipmates! The island’s just the place for lads like yerselves.” The pirate roared. “You
can swim all day, climb trees like the monkeys and eat coconuts, hunt like lions and cook slabs
of fresh killed meat on a roaring fire each and every day and night for the rest of your
natural lives.”
The man had a way about him that thrilled the three musketeers. Each boy saw something
familiar in the face and swagger of the pirate.
Dewey saw his favorite rock star. The one with the long straggly black hair and the dark
eye make-up, his cheeks bright red as though smeared with the blood of his victims. Dewey
bobbed his head to some imaginary rhythm as the pirate pranced across a stage inside Dewey’s
little brain, bouncing to the pulse of a heavy bass guitar and tribal drum beat.
Singing about keelhauling everything. School, home, family, the kid down the block who
beat Dewey up last summer. Anything and anybody that bothered Dewey, this guy could do in
with a song.
Louis wasn’t sure who he saw. Maybe one of the big tough kids who hung out in the
parking lot of the 7-11. Kids he admired but secretly feared. To get over his fear, he tried to
Field Trip Pirates--68
act like them.
Smoking cigarettes. Shoplifting at the drug store. Keying the entire side of the car he
thinks belonged to the old grouch up the street who snitched to his mom about how he broke
someone’s window one day he was caught throwing rocks .
Louis was just having fun and besides, it was an accident. Maybe it wasn’t him.
Maybe it was Huey. Yeah, it was Huey…He’d been throwing rocks too.
Instead of the way grown-ups always blamed him no matter what he did, it would
be a life of not being blamed for everything that goes wrong,
That’s what Louis heard
Huey couldn’t figure out why he was so impressed with the pirate. All he saw was his
dad.
But it was a new improved dad. Flashier. More stylish and sinister in whatever he was
doing.Huey had always been especially impressed with the way his dad could weasel his way out
of any problem. Do whatever it took. Lie, cheat, steal. Run away.
It didn’t matter who was hurt just so long as he got what he wanted out of it.
That’s why Huey didn’t sweat his father not being around. He knew the old man was
taking care of business.
Besides, mom so busy working, Huey was able to get away with more stuff.
Huey had a simple outlook on life. All adults were the same. All adults are assholes.
Huey’s solution: he was never going to grow up. No job, no family. No responsibilities.
If he couldn’t be a carefree fun loving musketeer, he figured he’d get himself lost.
That’s what Huey heard: Huey, the grown up getting away with stuff.
* * *
Field Trip Pirates--69
The ship starting acting peculiar. It didn’t just rock and roll from side to side the way it
did when the boys first climbed aboard. Now, it broke away from the restraints holding it in
place. The ship began rising and falling as if riding in a squall. Waves broke over the side.
There was thunder overhead and gulls flying around squealing.
Huey went to pull up the hood on his sweatshirt when he realized he wasn’t wearing his
smelly old Dallas Cowboys jersey. Instead, he was wearing a sissy red satin coat with shiny
buttons and big floppy sleeves like the ones those guys wearing the white wigs wore in the
pictures in that fat Social Studies book he looked at one time when the cable was out and there
was nothing else to do.
His sneakers were gone, too, replaced by these heavy clodhopper boots.
And his backwards baseball cap was gone. His head was covered by a red bandana that
smelled like fish or something worse.
He looked over at Louis and Dewey and saw they were dressed the same way, like
midget captain Hooks.
“Dude you look ridiculous.” One said to the other.
“Dude, I banged my head against the cement wall a few times when we were running
through here. I know I cracked the cement but did I crack something in my head too?”
“No me bucks. Your heads are fine and your eyes are seeing what they are meant to see.
For three such as ye were so meant for the life of the sea that you’ve been impressed for me
crew. Make sail.”
When the boys stood dumbfounded, they felt the crack of a whip. It stung each of them.
“Make sail. I said.”
Field Trip Pirates--70
“What are you talking about mister. I’m not impressed. I’m just a kid.” Louis whined,
then showing there was no honor among bad boys he squealed on his mates. “Besides, this was
all Huey’s idea. He’s the one who wanted to do the keelhaulin’.”
“I said, make sail.” The pirate growled and the boys heard a pistol fire.
Louis started bawling. Dewey ran from one end of the ship to the other then back.
“What are we gonna do. What are we gonna do.” He kept crying again and again.
Huey, being slightly smarter than his pals, tried to think. It was too difficult. His brain
was way too much out of practice. He looked into the shadows away from the smoke coming
from the pistol.
Suddenly, lightning flashed and he saw someone fighting with a gang of raging
buccaneers…
“Mr. J!”
* * *
Field Trip Pirates--71
Mr. J reached around in the dark for his pouch. The living manikins had confirmed his
suspicions. He had quietly followed the pair of manikins from the tavern exhibit.
He squeezed behind the wall and slid along until he reached a trap door. He
forced open the door and entered a small room. The room contained several computers and
stereo equipment, concealed wires ran in all directions with some cleverly hidden thick cables
leading under a second trap door that opened onto a long dark corridor.
“Stage lighting. A Virtual reality simulator.” He’d heard of such a thing from his son, the
computer expert but had never really paid much attention thinking that nothing could beat
applying good old fashioned human imagination to tinker with “real” reality. These sophisticated
gadgets seemed out of place in a pirate exhibit.
But then, there are pirates and there are pirates.
The manikins had gone somewhere beyond that dark corridor. He could tell by the
agitated way the rats scurried about, like they were deserting a sinking ship…
He heard noises coming from the end of the corridor. Must be another room, he
thought, as he fumbled about in his pouch, hoping he’d picked the right card. He paused with
several in hand but it was so dark, he couldn’t make out the inscription.
“Here goes.” He finally said, picking one and returning the others to the pouch.
Which card had he grabbed? He felt himself growing stronger and ready for battle.
Maybe it was the ‘Ace’ card?
That one read:
‘Achilles, part man, part Greek mythological god.
Crazed brawling a specialty. Superhuman acts of bravery on request.
Available for television wrestling, parent teacher conferences
and income tax audits.”
Field Trip Pirates--72
Or had he pulled the one he’d wanted. That one read:
Baker Street Irregular
“No mystery too complicated. No clue too insignificant.
Dashing debonair sword fights a specialty.
Nick of time rescues and happy endings in every mystery”
Available for finding missing homework, wayward parents, hounds lost on moors.
Somehow, the two cards had gotten stuck together. Once he finished with this field trip,
he’d have to
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