Wicked Whoopie Pies by Addison Moore (english novels to improve english TXT) 📕

as I give a slight shake of the head to Charlie. For the most part, I like to keep all talk about ghosts to a minimum. “Charlie, this is Keelie’s twin sister, Naomi. They’re both blondes by nature, but Naomi likes to rock her locks on the dark side, much like my sister Meg.” I leave out the tidbit of Naomi bullying me relentlessly back in high school. Technically, it was Naomi and Lily who did the bullying, but now that I routinely deposit money into Lily’s bank account by way of a paycheck, Lily has been a lot nicer to me. Naomi? Not so much.

“Nice to meet you.” Charlie doesn’t bother with a smile. “I guess that means we’re cousins.”

“Eh.” Naomi shrugs. “Don’t expect much because of it. I found out Lottie was my cousin a couple years back, and I don’t care for her any more than I did back when she was just a nuisance.”

I cluck my tongue. “Naomi is the manager at the Evergreen Manor. It’s much bigger than the B&B.”

“Yup.” Carlotta bobs her head up and down. “And it was more popular until Miranda’s dusty castle filled up with a bunch of spooky kooky ghosts. Now she runs those Haunted Honey Hollow Tours and makes a killing off of ’em, too.”

“That’s true,” I chime in. “And when she’s through, she sends the tourists my way for what she likes to call The Last Thing They Ate Tour.”

Charlie gives an amused blink. “I see profiteering off the dead isn’t frowned upon in Honey Hollow.”

“Oh, it is.” Naomi is quick to set her straight. “It’s just that the Lemons are prone to adulating crass things such as having multiple partners, having babies with questionable paternities—and the real humdinger? Landing one of their infamous desserts at the scene of a homicide just to pump up sales.”

“Come on, Naomi.” I avert my eyes. “You know I’m the only Lemon that does those things,” I say those last few words in air quotes.

“See there?” Carlotta slaps her hand over the counter as she looks to my sister. “Didn’t I tell ya she hates to share the spotlight?”

“I guess you did.” Charlie squints in my direction. “Don’t worry, sis. I’m not here to steal anything that belongs to you. I’m just here to take what’s rightfully mine.”

Naomi swoops in close and her mouth rounds out. “Ooh, I like you. How about we take these sweet treats to a private table and I can tell you all about Honey Hollow?”

“Sure thing.” Charlie gets up from her seat, still hand-feeding Binky a cookie as if it were the most natural thing in the world to have a cookie dissolve in your hand. “But we’ll have to make it quick. It’s my first day at work, and I was supposed to be at Mangias a half hour ago.” The two of them take off for the Honey Pot and I’m left choking in their wake.

“She’s going to get fired,” I tell Carlotta in a rage.

“Oh, who cares? The quicker she figures out that she’s not wanted, the faster she’ll leave town.”

“How can you say that?”

“She’s a thief and a liar, Lot Lot. Just take my word for it. No use in finding out for yourself. If you’re smart, you won’t let her within three feet of anyone you care about.”

I glance over to the table where Charlie and Naomi are gabbing away like old friends and watch as Suze and Lily head over to join them as well.

“I’m pretty sure all of those women can take care of themselves,” I mutter. “Although, she sort of did steal Binky. I’d better steal her back. Every second counts in a homicide investigation.”

“Pfft. Stinky Binky is already Team Cha Cha, Lot. Now that we know where her loyalty lies, we’ll know not to rely on her.” She narrows her eyes over me. “What’s going on with your hair, Lot Lot? Are you trying to give the Carlottas of Honey Hollow a bad name? It looks as if you’ve got more than a few skunks taking up residence in there.”

“I lost my brush. It must have fallen out of my bag at church yesterday. I had to use Everett’s comb, and it wasn’t nearly as prepared to deal with this bird’s nest.”

“Even the deceased had nice hair. Come on, Lot. I’m not buying your lost brush routine. Fess up. I heard you and Sexy trying to get a good rhythm going with that headboard, but every time you hit your stride, Little Yippy got going, too. Why don’t you lock the little squirt in that fancy baby jail you outfitted her cell with?”

I make a face. “Please stop calling her Little Yippy.” It’s not the first time and I doubt it’ll be the last. “And I can’t have her all the way down the hall in the nursery. I need her next to me. How else am I supposed to check to see if she’s breathing at ten-minute intervals?”

“Ah gee, aren’t you on a first-name basis with the Grim Reaper by now? Just tell ’em Little Yippy is off-limits and to boot scoot elsewhere.”

“Like your bedroom?” I tease.

She takes a moment to glare at me. “Back to your booty issues. Have Foxy take her for the night. Or I’m sure he’d be glad to sleep in Little Yippy’s pen. And that way you and Sexy can get your groove on.”

“I’m not having Noah babysit so my booty can groove. It feels wrong. I’ll just have to wait until Lyla Nell allows for it.”

“So Little Yippy is in charge of your sex life now, too? I bet a field trip to the Honey Hollow Fire Department is looking a little more tempting every day.”

“So is a one-way ticket to Arizona.”

“All right, all right.” She waves me off. “Let’s get focused. Who’s our first suspect?”

I’m about to open my mouth when a familiar woman with a caramel-colored bun breezes on in.

“Hold onto that thought,” I say as I walk in