Man-Kzin Wars XII by Larry Niven (books you have to read .TXT) 📕

I am, without a doubt, going to disrupt the progress. If she only knew. The way she talks, as if I were nothing more than a piece of forgotten trash, makes my resolve to ruin what she's built even stronger. Even Paz seems offended by Lucie's disgust toward me.

I know that I'm unique, a bizarre accident built on a circumstance. I shouldn't exist, but here I am, existing more than ever before because I saved the life of the messiah. I've molted my old skin and am anew. I am woke. I am aware, unlike the thousands of other drones here and at the compound in Egypt. I am aware that I'm aware. I'm not a drone, or a piece of forgotten trash. I am 80. And I will disrupt everything.

“80.” Paz touches my shoulder. It snaps me out of my building rage. “You okay?”

I look around, and I can't spot Lucie anywhere. How long was I zoned out? “Yes, sorry.”

“Good. Come with me.” She lumbers down the labyrinth of hallways, and I follow close behind. The layout of this structure is many times more intricate than the main compound. Some of the hallways here don't even look like they were part of the original building.

“Can we get food?” Now that I'm alone with Paz, I am much more at ease. Her presence is very welcoming and warm.

“I have some in my office. You can have as much as you like.” She slows down so I can walk next to her. “How do you like it here?”

I look at her. Is she testing me? Trying to pry information about what Farouk and I are doing? “It's okay.”

“Don't lie to me, 80. I can see through you from a mile away.” She chuckles, but it only makes me more suspicious.

“I'm not.” I guess part of it is correct, since I met KJ.

“Listen. What we discuss stays between you and me. I have no intentions of telling Lucie anything that could curtail your mission.” She must have picked up on my suspicion. “Farouk told me about what happened and about 13. He wanted me to talk to you about it, and about the effects of your continued evolution.”

A huge weight is lifted off my shoulders. With Paz on my side, I've found someone I can talk with about everything. KJ and 13 wouldn't understand, and conversations with Farouk always seem one-sided.

Paz opens a door near the end of a corridor that looks like all the others. There aren't any markings anywhere. How long did it take everyone to familiarize themselves with the layout? As soon as I step in, I run to a table with a bowl of pouches on it. I'm in the middle of my second one when I look up to see Paz shaking her head and smiling.

I put the empty and half-eaten pouch back in the bowl. “I'm so sorry.”

“It's quite alright. Help yourself.” She laughs as she takes a seat in a big brown chair on the other side of the table. She sinks into it as if the chair has learned every curve of her body.

“Thank you,” I reply as I grab the half-eaten pouch and sit in a chair that's next to me. It's not as welcoming, but I find a comfortable position leaning forward. It's great because it keeps me at arm's length from more pouches, which I help myself to a few more times.

“So, tell me what happened with 13.” She grabs a pouch herself, opens it, and places it on the table in front of her.

“He followed me into the city. I was having dinner with KJ when—” I stop short. I knew I shouldn't have said KJ's name. Paz will react like the others and tell me not to see her. Not that anyone can stop me if I choose to see her.

“When what?” she pries. Upon reading my apprehension, she adds, “Don't worry about KJ. I'll ask about her later. I think it's fascinating that you are developing romantic feelings.”

I almost spit up the entire third pouch I just inhaled. “I don't have romantic feelings!”

“You do. You just don't know what those feelings are yet, but you will.” She laughs. I don't like it. I don't like that she's laughing at me. But she's right. I don't know what she's talking about. I know I like KJ. Are those what romantic feelings are?

“13 and another drone attacked us.” I cut off her laughter. The whole topic is making me uncomfortable.

“And?” She grabs her pouch and takes a big mouthful.

“We fought. The other drone was killed, but I choked 13 until he blacked out.” I'm cautious about revealing how the other drone died. I don't want to get KJ's mom in trouble. “When he came to, I could tell he had changed.”

Paz grabs a tablet and starts writing down notes. “Changed how?”

I take a few moments to think, trying to recollect what happened. “There seemed to be more there. Like a dam broke in his mind, and a flow of new information was flooding his head.”

“Interesting. Is this what happened to you?” She's so preoccupied with my story, she hasn't noticed that the contents of her pouch have spilled onto her table.

“Yes. Right after I was shot, and it hasn't stopped. The flood is still happening. I just feel I'm navigating it better.” I answer.

Paz thinks for a few moments, subconsciously cleaning up the pouch that had leaked on her table. She speaks to herself. “So, you need to bring a drone close to death, and they will turn.”

“I think so,” I add.

“Interesting.” She stands from her chair and walks around the table to me. I stand to meet her, and with her hand on my back, she ushers me to the door. Before she opens it to let me out, she looks me in the eye. “Come back in a couple of days. I will have something for you. And next time you