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called the cops.” Carlin looked away as he forced himself to continue. ”After the third time, when it took over a week to find him, I had to face the fact that keeping him with me was selfish. I didn’t want the guilt that would come with putting him in a private facility, and I didn’t want to lose my dad. I put him on the waiting list for the best psychiatric facility in the city. He was moved there a little over three weeks ago.”

Carlin’s chin was clasped in a firm grip. Matt tugged and Carlin gave in, turning back to face him. Matt rained soft kisses on his lips, his eyes, the top of his head. Each kiss opened something up in Carlin, tiny embers of warmth that bloomed and spread to chase away the desolation he felt when he thought of what he’d done to his dad.

“You didn’t have any choice, sweetheart,” Matt said with an assurance that blotted out a chunk of Carlin’s guilt. “You did what was best for him despite how it hurt you. Then your aunt died…and I’m so sorry. You’ve lost so much in such a short period of time.”

Maybe he had, or maybe he’d lost his father and Aunt Mary a long time ago. One to an insidious illness, the other to distance and responsibility.

Chapter Six

Matt couldn’t stand to see Carlin hurting. He almost wished he hadn’t seen the picture of Carlin, smiling although his eyes were tinged with sadness, and his father, a tall, burly man who looked as if his personality had vanished and left behind an empty shell. But Carlin had needed to hear that he wasn’t at fault, needed someone to help assuage the guilt he obviously felt, so for that reason Matt was glad he’d discovered the photo.

Now, however, Matt wasn’t sure what he should do with the man in his arms. Would he be taking advantage of Carlin if he suggested they pick back up where they’d left off before Matt had opened the wallet? What kind of pervert did it make him to even be having thoughts of fucking a man so clearly grieving?

But he could almost hear the clock ticking down the hours left for them to spend together, and while Matt might not be in love with the man, he liked what he’d seen of him, physically and personality wise. Once Carlin went back to New York, all Matt would have would be whatever memories they made, and he knew already they’d be precious and few. Still, he was torn between being the friend Carlin needed right now, or being the lover he ached to be.

Carlin made the decision for him. Looking up at Matt with those cactus-green eyes, he pleaded, “Make me forget, at least for a little while.”

Matt could do that. “If you’d like to stay, I’ll do my best to make you forget about everything else but this attraction between us.”

“Yes please,” Carlin whispered as he leaned closer. He licked his bottom lip, leaving it glistening, a temptation Matt couldn’t resist. Matt swooped down and captured the slick pink flesh with his teeth, scraping it gently then sucking Carlin’s tongue into his mouth. He slid his hands down to Carlin’s ass and lifted the man onto his lap.

Carlin whimpered and clutched at Matt’s shoulders, his fingers curling around Matt’s muscles. Matt’s hips jerked reflexively, his dick riding the crevice of Carlin’s bottom. Carlin’s erection bumped against Matt’s stomach, smearing a trail of pre-cum on his skin.

Matt nibbled on Carlin’s lips then twisted and rolled them over until his thighs braced Carlin’s. Matt felt around on the mattress until he found the wallet. He sat up and kept his gaze locked with Carlin’s as he dug the condom from the pocket he’d seen it in the first time he’d opened the wallet. Matt plucked the package out and stuffed the wallet under a pillow.

“Put it on me,” he ordered as he handed the rubber to Carlin.

Carlin took the package then hesitated as he started to open it. He frowned and looked at Matt. “I don’t suppose you have any lube?”

“God damn it!” Matt wanted to punch a wall, he needed to fuck Carlin so badly. “I’ve never had any need for it. Even before I realized I was interested in men, I didn’t fuck around with many women. Shit!”

Carlin’s look of disappointment flickered then lifted completely. “Lotion? Vaseline? Hell, olive oil or butter will work, I don’t care. Just want you to fuck me.”

“You can use…” Matt trailed off as images of him licking butter off Carlin’s cock popped into his head. “Oh fuck, fuck, I think I wanna try the butter, but not right now. Kitchen’s too far.” Matt rolled over until he could reach the nightstand. He pulled open the drawer and took out the small jar of petroleum jelly.

“I hope this will do.” It wasn’t a name brand, but surely it was pretty much the same stuff.

“Perfect.” Carlin ripped open the condom package and gestured at him. “C’mere already.”

Matt scooted over until he was kneeling beside Carlin’s waist. He held the base of his dick while Carlin started to roll the rubber down his length, but Carlin paused and murmured, “Damn.”

Matt looked down and saw the ugly red scar on his stomach. He started to cover it, but Carlin slapped his hand away.

“Don’t. Don’t you dare,” Carlin snapped. “That’s nothing you should be embarrassed about. It’s proof of how strong you are, how determined, and I think it’s fucking sexy.”

“Oh,” Matt mumbled, his cheeks burning in a flush he could feel spreading down to his neck. “It’s ugly, so big and—”

Carlin glared at him and rolled the condom down as he talked. “I swear, Matthew Nixon, you may think I’m a helpless little guy, but I can flip you on your back and kick your ass before you know what hit you. I have more than one black belt, thanks to my absolute terror as a

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