Ravage by Lacey Andersen (ebook reader online txt) 📕

“Well, uh,” the professor says, straightening his glasses. “Today we will be discussing mates.”

That’s it. He doesn’t introduce me or himself like the other classes, just launches right into it.

I settle back in my chair, deciding I like him a little.

“What do we know of mates?”

A second later, Mary Ann enters the room. Every muscle in my body tenses, and I’m surprised to see that her face has the puffy quality of someone who’s been crying. The professor doesn’t acknowledge her, and she sits next to Lucian. Which bugs me, for some reason.

If she was actually my brother’s mate, like she claims to be, she’d know his friends...

The professor clears his throat. “So, uh, what do we know of mates?”

A fae male raises his hand and the professor nods at him. “We know that every light fae is capable of having a mate. No one knows why, although many suspect our lives are like the tangled lines of our magic, and that some lines have tangled together with other fae… We just don’t know it until we meet those people. And we also know that sometimes a female can have more than one mate. Two is uncommon. Three is even rarer. And I think there’s only been a few cases in history where a woman had four.”

“Very good,” says the professor. “What else?”

A female fae wearing a giant pink bow in her curly blonde hair raises her hand, then drops it when the professor nods in her direction. “We know the dark fae don’t have mates. Again, no one is sure why, but we suspect it’s because they lack the ability to love at all.” She looks back at me and a smugness comes over her expression. “In fact, many people believe that comparing dark fae to light fae is like comparing fish to birds.”

The professor humphs under his breath. “Actually, biologically dark fae are nearly identical to light fae. The only obvious difference comes from the emotions we feed off of. So it is possible for dark fae to have mates. It’s simply suspected that because there are so few of them, it’s unlikely that they’ll meet their mates. Now, do we have any students who have found their mates in the classroom?”

Pink bowed girl lifts that hand of hers again. “Professor Windrawl, Mary Ann found her mate!”

It’s like a blow to the gut. But what surprises me more is that the overwhelming swell of happiness that seems to pour from these people like diarrhea finally stops, replaced by…sadness.

“Really?” Professor Windrawl’s gaze swings to her.

Lucian jumps in like her freaking knight in shining armor. “Rayne Bloodmore was her mate.”

Those waves of sadness intensify, tears sting my eyes, and the ground shifts under my feet. I’m grabbing my bag and heading out of the classroom. I hear the professor say something, but I can’t stop. My own sadness was hard enough to ignore, I couldn’t handle the raw emotions radiating off of everyone else. It made me feel like something important inside of me was breaking.

If I’d have been smart, I would’ve just put up my walls and stopped feeling the other students’ emotions. I didn’t know why I hadn’t just done that, but my feet keep moving until I head to a random tree in the midst of the perfect grass. Collapsing against the tree, I close my eyes.

Is this what it is to be around people? If it was, I didn’t like it.

I wanted my ghosts and my monsters. I wanted the fog and the darkness. But most of all, I wanted this terrible aching in my chest to stop, even if I had to rip my heart out to do so. So far, a heart has done me nothing but harm all my life.

My eyes shoot open when someone sits down beside me. To my shock, it’s Mary Ann, and she has tears streaming down her cheeks. “That bitch, Brittany, brings him up everywhere I go.”

I’m so surprised I speak without thinking. “Since when do light fae use the word bitch?”

Those tear-filled eyes swing to me, and she’s wiping at the tears on her face. “My parents always said it was so important to be happy all the time. But Rayne…he said it wasn’t normal. He said it was okay to be sad or mad.” She looks away from me, but the tears continue to flow. “He was the only person who made me feel like it was okay not to be a ray of sunshine all the time.”

I hate it that I know what she means. “He made me feel the same way.”

She wipes at the tears again and her gaze meets mine. “He talked about you all the time. I mean, all the time. I feel like I know you as well as I knew him.”

“He never spoke about you,” I say, and try, and fail, to keep the bitterness out of my voice.

“Rayne had a plan.” A sad laugh explodes from her lips. “A whole future with the three of us. He thought we’d be best friends.”

I don’t know what to say, so I curl my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs. Mary Ann doesn’t seem like my brother’s type. Even if she lets the occasional curse word fly, she’s just as likely to be responsible for his death than anyone else. So…why did I feel myself starting to trust her?

“So…what’s it like living with the boys?”

I shrug, not wanting to tell her anything about me.

“At least you know they won’t hit on you.”

I lift a brow. “Why’s that?”

She lowers her voice. “So, you know how the Royal Fae Academy works, right? Parents can send their kids starting from the age of six. The younger schools are spread out in the woods. Some parents will send them all year, some just for the summer, etc. Many of the students here have