Dearly Departing by Geoff North (book reader for pc txt) 📕

sitting next to him, was someone that needed him, that loved him. She enjoyed his company, and his stories. Sharing his few and fading memories of Alicia had done them both a world of good.

It was a shame the ghosts from his past wouldn’t fade as easily.

“So, is that it?”

“What?” Ray glanced over at Dawn as they slipped by another featureless little prairie town and its trademark grain elevator.

“You haven’t said a word since Indian Head. Don’t you have any more stories?” She paused for a moment. “Or maybe there isn’t much more after that to share.”

“I know your mother told you more about Alicia… Do you need details?”

“That isn’t fair.” Dawn looked away from him and stared out the passenger window.

Five long minutes passed before Ray offered an apology. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t shut you out like that.” Ray pulled the car off onto the side of the highway and started to cry.

“Dad?” Dawn reached for his shoulder, but he shrugged her hand away. “What’s wrong? What did I say?”

“It isn’t you,” he wept. “It’s me… It’s all this silence and guilt inside. It’s all the things I didn’t say. To you. To your mother.”

A semi roared by rocking the Cruze on its four wheels like a boat at sea. Dawn tapped the steering wheel. “Maybe I should drive again.”

“No, I can manage.” Ray put the car back into drive and crept another quarter mile along the shoulder until he came to a gravel road approach. He parked the car, turned it off, and sighed heavily. “It’s time I told you… it’s time I told someone the truth about my little sister. Of what really happened to her, and my part in it.”

“It was an accident,” Dawn said. “A terrible tragedy. You had nothing—”

“I had everything to do with it.”

1981

If there had ever been a more beautiful morning in all of Raymond’s young life, he couldn’t remember it. The last morning of June was magical. School had ended a few days earlier, and the long summer holiday lay before him like an entire lifetime spread out over two sun-drenched months. Raymond’s oldest brother was off with his new girlfriend somewhere, and Bruce had accompanied their father to another town in search of some dumb piece of farm equipment. Raymond’s chores were done, and the birds were singing. The sun was already hot in the cloudless sky.

There was almost a sense of urgency in his desire to make the most—or the least—of his day. Raymond wasn’t too young to realize the carefree days of childhood were coming to an end. In a few more years his interests and responsibilities would be more like those of his brothers. He might have a girlfriend, and he would be big enough to help his family run the farm. These were the days to take full advantage of what he still had. Youth. Freedom. He would treat this morning as one of his last and do absolutely nothing.

With a dozen comic books under one arm and a couple of cold bottles of Coca-Cola held against his chest with the other, Raymond made his way to the big oak in the back yard. He settled down in a shady area up against the rough tree trunk and opened the newest edition of The Amazing Spider-Man onto his lap. He sipped on the first Coke and flipped through the colorful pages. After a few minutes, even that small task became a chore. Raymond propped the half-finished pop up against the tree at his side and tossed the comic book back onto the pile. He nestled further down into the grass and locked his fingers behind his head. It was too bright up in the blue sky to keep his eyes open for long. He closed them and listened to the bird songs. A cooling breeze wafted over his bare tummy where the tee-shirt had ridden up. It truly was the most beautiful, carefree day of Raymond’s life.

Or at least it was until he heard his mother calling his name.

Raymond met her on the steps of the back porch. She was leaning out through the screen door with a frustrated look on her face. “When’s the last time you saw your sister?”

“I dunno. Breakfast I guess.”

“Her room’s a mess. Dirty clothes all over the place, dolls and toys tossed wherever, candy wrappers and dishes shoved under the bed.”

Raymond wasn’t sure why he had to stand there and listen to the list of reasons his sister had pissed their mother off. It wasn’t his room. It wasn’t his mess. He wanted to get back to his tree. Nancy Wallace wasn’t going to let that happen.

“I want you to find her,” she said, pointing a finger at Raymond’s face. “Find her and drag her back to the house if you have to.”

“Aaww, Mom…”

“Don’t you start. Your room isn’t in much better condition.”

Raymond raised his hands in defeat and started backing down the steps. He wandered around the perimeter of the house first, looking to see if Alicia had found a nice spot in the shade to play with her dolls. His search spread out from there, taking him again to the back yard. She wasn’t by the swing set or near the oak tree where his pile of comic books and Coke waited. He called out her name and listened. He yelled it as loud and long as he could then shut his eyes to hear the distant reply.

Nothing.

This wasn’t like Alicia. She was too young to go very far. Raymond remembered the slough fiasco and shook his head. She would never go back there, not in a million-zillion years. But she was nowhere around near-by, and Raymond’s annoyed mood gave way to a mild sense of worry. Where had she gone?

He started looking in the buildings farther away from