Young Love Dies Hard: The Young Brothers, Book 1 by Nikki Lane (best memoirs of all time txt) 📕

OCD, and now I’m suffering from Social Anxiety Disorder.”

“You know I’m thinking about becoming a psych major.”

“Taking one class in abnormal psych does not qualify you to make a credible diagnosis. If anyone has the disorder, it’s you.”

“Do not.” I walked over to the fridge to grab a bottle of water.

He lounged back on the couch and hooked his pen on the arm of his eyeglasses. “Why do you care so much whether I go to this party or not?”

I leaned against the kitchen counter. “I don’t.” I took another sip. “I’m going to get ready for work.”

* * * *

I came home to a dark apartment. The usual mess of blankets and pillows was missing from the couch, so I flicked on the light.

It was nearly three in the morning, and Jacob wasn’t home.

I flopped on the couch, feeling a little deflated. He actually went to the party. And probably because I made such a big deal about it. My mind started to drift as I wondered what he was doing, and who he was doing it with. Was Taylor spilling her sticky sweetness all over him? She didn’t look like the kind to put out on the first night. But sometimes we weren’t all so obvious.

I needed to distract myself. And wash the smell of other men off my body. Every time I closed my eyes in the shower, I saw Taylor’s hands all over Jacob. This was ridiculous. Jacob wasn’t mine. I didn’t have claim over him. If he wanted to go out and have mindless sex with someone, who was I to stop him? I was the last person to argue against mindless sex.

I got out of the shower and heard the front door open and close as I brushed my hair. I wrapped the towel tighter around my body and peered out the door. Jacob’s silhouette was standing near the couch, pulling his shirt over his head.

“Hey,” I said.

“Hey.” He tossed his shirt on the floor. “How was work?”

“Fine. How was the party?”

“I didn’t go.” He kicked off his shoes and started to unbuckle his belt.

I gaped at him from the bathroom.

“Why do you look so surprised?” he asked. “I told you I wasn’t going.”

“I know. I was sure you’d change your mind.” I walked a little closer, my eyes gleaming over his bare chest. I’d just spent the last five hours being ogled by every slimy guy within a hundred miles. It felt good to be able to enjoy a little of my own eye candy. How was it possible this was a man who had only slept with one woman? It just seemed to go against all the laws of nature. Like hearing a dog meow. It made no fucking sense. “Where’d you go so late?”

“Made a food run.” He gestured to the bag on the coffee table. “I was studying so hard I forgot to eat.”

“I would’ve picked something up for you.”

He shrugged. “It’s fine. I needed the break.” He took out his food and unwrapped the sandwich on the table. “Hungry?”

I shook my head even though he wasn’t looking at me. “No, thank you.” Beads of water trickled down my arm. It felt like I was covered in ladybugs. “I’m going to get dressed. Are you going to be up for a little longer?”

He nodded, then took another bite of food.

I headed to my room and slipped on a tank top and a pair of cotton shorts. Jacob was lounged on the couch in just a pair of jeans, all evidence of food gone. A movie was paused and ready to go on the TV.

“Want to watch a movie with me?” The light from the TV highlighted his face. He scratched his scruffy beard and the sound made me want to rub my hands all over it.

“Sure.”

He patted the space next to him, and I happily slid in the spot. He felt warm and solid and smelled like home. I took my first deep breath all night.

I nuzzled in close to his bare chest, resting my head in the crook of his arm. To anyone else, we could be just another couple enjoying a movie night. But we weren’t. And the thought stung a little.

Jacob grabbed the remote and started the movie.

Dirty Dancing.

I peered up at him and smiled as his fingers fiddled with the ends of my hair.

“You’re never going to meet anyone if this how you keep spending your weekends.”

“What about you?” he said. “When’s the last time you went out on a date?”

I stifled a laugh. “I don’t go out on dates, Jacob.”

“And why is that?”

It took me a few seconds to respond. “I just don’t.”

“You’ve never been on a date?”

“Nope, dating’s not really my thing.”

He shifted in his seat. “When’s the last time you were in a relationship?”

“Um…” I made some funny noises with my mouth, pretending to calculate the time. “Never.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Nope.”

“So what do you do?” I could tell he was thinking about it.

I sat up straight. “Do I really have to explain it?”

“I’m sorry. I just find it hard to believe that you’ve never been in a relationship before.”

“Why?”

“Because…”

It was obvious he was struggling to answer.

“Because why, Jacob?”

He looked away. “Look at you, Maeve.” His fingers pulled at the frayed fabric of the couch. “I mean, you have to know.”

“Know what?” I muttered.

His eyes fell on me. “How beautiful you are.”

A warm ache coiled though my entire body. “You think I’m beautiful?”

“Of course I do. I’m not blind.”

I smiled wide, believing he would never tell me something he really didn’t mean. There was no ulterior motive. And in that moment, I felt beautiful.

“Well, you’re not exactly hideous, either.”

Why was I so bad at this?

He laughed. “Thanks…I think.”

He readjusted so that the gap between our bodies was sealed. I didn’t want to admit that it made the blood rush through me.

I shied my reddening face away. He reached his hand out to touch my jaw and gently turned my head to face him. I stood absolutely