Here Be Dragons - 1 by Sharon Penman (best inspirational books txt) 📕

a maltreated child might weep, helplessly, utterly without hope.When he lifted her in his arms, she felt as light as a child, too, frighteningly fragile. After putting her down upon the bed, he started to rise, but she clung to him and he sat beside her, holding her as she wept.At last her sobs began to subside. She no longer sounded so incoherent and he leaned over, put his lips to her forehead. Although she did not feel feverish, he was not yet reassured. "Shall I summon my physician?"Her head moved on the pillow, tossed emphatically from side to side. He rose, crossed to the washing laver, and came back to the bed. Joanna stirred when he gently wiped her face with a wet cloth, lay looking up at him with tears silently trickling from the corners of her eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered."I'm so sorry. I love you, I do. I never meant for it to happen, I swear it. ..""I know that, breila.""You . . . you know?""Why should that surprise you so? You wanted to see Gruffydd banished, not imprisoned. That was no part of your plan. Did you think1 doubted that?""Gruffydd." Joanna closed her eyes. "No," she echoed faintly, that was no part of my plan ..."Llewelyn regarded her in silence for several moments. The signs of strain were much more apparent now than they'd been in the hall, the

614her now, he was thinking that there were other benefits, as well subsequent barrenness, for her body had retained the supple m tone, the lissome and willowy grace of her youth. His eyes follow H fall of her hair, from breast to hip, and up again to her face. Feelin i/ gaze upon her, she glanced over her shoulder, smiled radiantly a H k'S said, "Joanna, what is there between you and Will de Braose?" 6Joanna would never know how she managed to continue pou wine, how she kept her hand steady. Very carefully she set the fla ^ back on the table. "What do you mean, Llewelyn?""The tension in the hall was hard to miss." His voice was dry h' eyes unwavering upon her face. She gripped the wine cup between h palms, took one quick swallow, and then walked back to the bed. Wh had she not foreseen this?Who knew better than she how keen his eve could be?"You are right," she said slowly. "I suppose I was not very good at hiding my feelings. I'm sorry if I was rude. But I find it very difficult to be in Will de Braose's company. You know how I feel about his family. And with Will, it is more than I can bear, for he loved Maude well, and his hatred of John is still green, still very raw. He told me ... told me that Maude died mad."Her shudder was not feigned, was all too real. It did not escape Llewelyn, nor did the sudden reversion back to "John." He slid over and she got into bed, handed him the wine cup. "I thought it was something like that," he said. "Ah, lass, I am truly sorry."Joanna forced herself to lift her head, to look into his eyes, dark eyes full of intelligence and affection . . . and faith. He loved her, would never suspect her of so base a betrayal. He trusted her. She'd have to bear that to the end of her days, the burden of his trust.Llewelyn put his arm around her shoulders, drew her down against his chest."Would it be easier for you if I moved the court back to Aber, whilst keepingWill here at Rhosyr till his ransom is paid?""Jesti, yes! Oh, yes, please." She kissed his throat, blinking back tears.She'd thought she'd reached the nadir of shame and self-loathing on that last day in the hafod, raging at Will, at her incredible folly. But if was infinitely worse now, having to lie to Llewelyn, to look into his eyes and take such despicable advantage of his love. ."Joanna, I do understand your feelings for the de Braose fam~yt j know you've never been at ease with any of them. And I would could promise you need never set eyes upon Will again. But I ca"Llewelyn . . . what are you saying? What are you trying me?" rn "IShe sounded suddenly so frightened that he frowned, bit his P-

r625t Buellt Castle, breila I've got to have it, for it commands the upper *£hes of the Gwy Valley""II do not understand Davydd said Will had agreed to pay you e thousand marks Surely he'd not yield up Buellt, too7" "No, of course not But he is willing to give it as his daughter's rnage portion That is what I am trying to tell you, Joanna Will and I ve agreed upon an alliance, one secured by wedlock, the marriage of his eldest daughter and our son ""Davydd Davydd is to wed Will's daughter7" "In time Isabella is but a little lass yet, so I expect they'll only plight troth for now " Llewelyn leaned over, tenderly kissed Joanna's upturned face "I know this does not please you, love, and I am sorry But ,t cannot be helped "Joanna turned her head into his shoulder, brought her hand up to her mouth, bit down on her fist She must not laugh If she did, she'd not be able to stopLike her mother So many years ago, but Joanna could still hear her, hear peal after peal of that shrill, hysterical laughter as her mother looked at her, at her bastard child, her "mistake " We pay and pay for our sins, she'd gasped We pay and pay10DEGANWY, NORTH WALESSeptember 1229J-JLEWELYN'S grandsons were standing on the airs °f the keep, watching as he rode through the gateway into the er bailey The younger boy, his namesake, was a dark, solemn child, °

e 616id that Senena felt a what he'd heard in zing Llewelyn, howsr.