Simply Feminine � Surprising Insights from Men by Wonderly, Morgan (best novels for beginners .txt) 📕

might say, “Oh, I would never go camping,” or “I never stay up past 9:30 p.m.,” or “I don’t do mornings,” or “I’m not a computer person,” or “I don’t wear dresses.” Can’t, won’t, don’t, and never are all words we use when we are resisting.

Allowing, on the other hand, is about saying “yes” to what resonates with our hearts. We often say “no” to things that could transform our lives for the better—like saying “no” to a trip to Europe or “no” to a local painting class or simply saying “no” to a first date when we could have said “yes.” We get stuck in a cycle of our habits, which can make us rigid over time. We can break out of this cycle just by asking ourselves, “Am I doing this out of habit? Or out of fear? Is there an opportunity to grow by choosing differently next time?”

Just making this small adjustment can keep us moving forward, keep us fresh, exciting, and youthful. We can reinvent our lives by doing something we’ve never done before, even if we don’t think we’ll be good at it. Our world can open up if we allow more and resist less.

Look again at the trellis and the vine allegory. The feminine vine is never inflexible or rigid; she flows and adapts to her surroundings. She’s never stagnant. She’s ever moving, ever changing. The beautiful vine can do this because she is receptive to the support of her trellis. She doesn’t tell him she’s not interested in his helping hand. She doesn’t tell him she prefers to do it alone. She openly accepts his gifts.

Another attribute of receptivity is being approachable. Men can sense whether or not we’re approachable. They sense when it’s safe to strike up a conversation with us.

When we are approachable and feminine, men are drawn to us. They see us as receptive when we embody an attitude of liking men. For example, by smiling, making eye contact, and projecting through our body language, men we’re attracted to know we are welcoming.

Men Love Our Admiration of Them

Think of admiration as the “holy grail” of feminine qualities. Just as with a man’s need for trust, men need women’s admiration more than they need our love. They need it more than sex! So it’s highly beneficial to develop various ways of admiring men. Every time we meet a man, we can ask ourselves what we can admire about him. We can do this even with men who aren’t relationship potential. This is good practice for appreciating masculinity in general. We may be surprised by the positive outcome of focusing on men’s good masculine qualities. On an energetic level, men can feel our acceptance and admiration, and it feels great to them.

Rather than complimenting a man on how well he cleans the kitchen, admire him for his masculine traits: character, bravery, honor, trustworthiness, stability, perseverance, intelligence, leadership, steadfastness, competence, and contributions to society. An example of admiration would be the way we feel about Captain Sully, who saved two hundred lives by safely landing an airplane in the Hudson River in January 2009. We can’t help but admire him for his skills as a pilot and his courage in a stressful and potentially deadly situation. Every masculine man has a Captain Sully living inside him, and a woman can bring it out by sincerely admiring him.

“I want to experience admiration by receiving verbal and physical feedback. I don’t mean sex here; I mean a literal pat on the back, a caress on the arm or across the shoulder, a look that says: thank you for what you just did or thank you for what you do for us. It has to be deserved of course, but actually, a little over-exaltation is not a bad idea at all, because it makes me want to do more, not out of need for approval or for the reward of feedback, but out of love. That would nurture love in me.”

– Paul J.

Men Love Our Gratefulness

As feminine women, gratitude is the most powerful attitude we can possess. When we are in a state of gratitude, magic happens. The more grateful we are, the more good we attract into our lives—including good men!

Practicing gratitude for everything in our lives is profoundly beneficial. One way we can accomplish this is with a gratitude journal. Every morning we can make a journal entry listing ten to twenty things, people, or circumstances to be grateful for, including those items we tend to take for granted, such as sleeping in a warm bed, having access to running water, and having a roof over our heads. Ponder them throughout the day. Remember, many people in the world don’t have even the basic necessities.

In this state of thankfulness, our energetic vibration rises, which makes for a smoother day and more upbeat interactions with others, including the men we encounter. When we show our gratitude to our men, we not only inspire them, we become more attractive to them. They will be motivated to be more and do more and to give us additional reasons to be grateful, which will motivate them even more. This virtuous cycle can add positive momentum to a relationship, helping us to painlessly move through bumps that could otherwise derail a relationship.

“Why gratitude works: How can something as simple as gratitude be such a powerful tool for creating more happiness in our lives? The answer lies in the Law of Attraction. Remember the third principle of the Guiding Three: What you appreciate, appreciates. If you want more good in your life, rather than focusing your energy on the problems and obstacles, focus your attention on what’s already good, what’s working. This automatically draws more good to you.”

– Marci Shimoff, Author of Happy for No Reason

Men Love Our Youthful Attitudes

Men love youthful women of all ages. Youthfulness is at least as much about attitude as it is about age or looks. It’s about being fresh and open. It’s