The Daddy P.I. Casefiles: The First Collection by Frost, J (great novels .txt) π
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βLook at me,β I say gently, and when the big, hazel eyes, still a little tear-stained, lift to me, I stroke my knuckles down the side of her face. βTell me your mantra.β
She takes a deep breath before she recites, βI belong to my daddy. Every inch of me. He holds me in his hands. I am safe with my daddy. Always and forever.β
I can see the mantra calm her. The pinching around her eyes smooths; her breathing slows. As much as my dominance and comfort allay her old fears, the mantra brings her back into the right headspace. Where she knows sheβs safe and loved.
βGood girl. Iβll help you clean up the mess. Weβll move Sableβs litter box into the bathroom. Thatβs where my mother kept the catβs litter box when Lizbeth had a cat. Sable might even be able to smell that still.β I stroke her cheek again and hold her eyes. βThen youβre going to come back in here and sit on the floor and put your hand under the couch to let Sable smell you again, so he calms down. Youβre Sableβs person, baby doll. You need to relax so he can.β
She squares her little shoulders. βSorry, Daddy. Youβre right. I need to be calm for Sable. And moving the litter box into the bathroom is a good idea. I donβt know why I didnβt think of that.β
βDaddy has good ideas occasionally. Cβmon, up you come.β I offer her my hand as I push to my feet. She sets the tips of her fingers in my palm but rises on her own. Which is probably a good thing since Iβm sore after the physical therapy. Once we have the cat sorted, Iβm putting on a game and crashing out on the couch. The Spanish have it right. A siesta is the only way to deal with an August afternoon.
Now that sheβs calm, Emily deals with the pee-puddle efficiently, wiping it up, bagging the paper towels so they donβt stink up the garbage, then mopping the floor with one of her nontoxic, non-fish-killing vinegar mixtures. The smellβs gone by the time she leaves the damp patch to dry. I help her pick a good spot in the bathroom for the litter box, then lead her back into the living room. The catβs out from under the couch and meowing, but when he sees us, he darts back under the couch.
βIf he feels he made a mess, Sable might be nervous,β I tell her. βIf you sit on the floor and offer him your fingers to sniff, that might calm him down.β
βYes, Daddy.β She gives me a grateful smile before dropping to sit cross-legged on the floor beside the couch.
I stretch out on the sectional and flick on the telly. Itβs a huge flatscreen that my sister and her husband gave me for my first Christmas in the house. I find the test cricket, England versus Australia, which will go on for several hours, and lower the volume so the surround-sound doesnβt scare Sable.
That allows me to hear Emilyβs soft croons as she talks to the cat. βThatβs a good boy, Sable. Everythingβs okay. Daddy found a better spot for your litter box. Heβs not mad. Itβs okay.β
After several iterations of this litany, I hear the catβs rusty purr.
I slide pillows behind my back and prop up my leg with others. Itβs aching like a bad tooth. The sectional gives me good support, and within a few minutes, my bodyβs relaxed and my eyelids are drooping despite the game.
βEmmy,β I say softly. βCome up here.β
She rises and sits on the edge of the couch, then without being asked, climbs over me and snuggles down on my right side, sandwiched neatly between my body and the backrest. Thatβs where I want her. I tug down the neckline of her dress and slide off the nipple clamps one by one, rubbing the tips to help soothe the ache as the blood flows back. Once she stops whimpering, I pull her arm across my chest. βI need my beanie blanket.β
A soft, sleepy giggle. She doesnβt nap every day, but with me breaking up her sleep last night and our trip through the heat today, sheβs probably happy to take one with me now. βOne beanie blanket, coming up,β she whispers, snuggling.
The wave of emotion that tightens my chest is uncomfortable in its intensity, but I let it bite deep. This is what itβs all about. This is what I havenβt had with my other bottoms and lovers. This sense of peace and contentment. This is my reward. βLove you, little girl.β
βI love you, too, Daddy. Ta for everything. Youβre the best daddy in the universe.β
Smiling, I let that thought, and the two hundred and forty runs weβre up over the bastard Aussies, carry me off to sleep.
* * *
Iβm awakened by warmth on my chest, and the sounds of a motorboat engine in my ears. For a moment, Iβm back in the Gulf of Aden, with the hard, African sun trying to fry my brains straight through my helmet and the gun boat bouncing beneath me. Eyes the translucent blue of the water, startling in his deep brown face, turn to me. Seaman Ernest Jones. He shouts and points, and then the side of his head dissolves in a spray of red.
I blink away the memory and meet a slit-eyed, golden stare. The rumbling gets louder, vibrating through my chest.
Lifting my hand from Emilyβs shoulder, I wipe my sweaty face. With Emily limp against my side and the cat perched on my chest, itβs like sleeping in an oven, despite the breeze from the open French doors.
Iβm not on a boat chasing Somalian pirates. Iβm in my living room, in New York, safe and mostly whole, with my baby girl at my side, and her schizophrenic, one-eyed cat on my chest.
I hold my fingertips out to the cat the way Emily does, and
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