Full Moon by Rachel Hawthorne (best biographies to read .txt) 📕

“It doesn’t matter.” I’d stopped them from killing each other. That was the only thing I considered important.

“I take it you’re not any closer to figuring things out.”

I shook my head. “If at all possible, I’m just more confused. So what happened with the birdwatchers?”

“Zander took them out. I wanted to be here in case, you know, you needed some support.”

I gave her a grateful smile. “I’m glad you’re here, but I really need to talk with Connor.” I shoved myself to my feet and met Lucas’s gaze. “How long do you think the healing will take?”

“A few minutes.”

“Did Connor ask you to reassign Rafe?”

His face was an unreadable mask—and ironically, this gave me the answer.

“So moving Daniel to our team wasn’t about finding someone for Brittany.”

“It was. It just wasn’t the only reason.”

I had a brief moment of wondering how things were going with Brittany, before I grabbed my flashlight and strode into the passageway. I found Connor sitting at the edge of the pool, fully clothed. A quick sweep of the light revealed that he no longer had any injuries. With a sigh I settled down beside him and stared at the pool of water, trying to figure out where I should go from here.

“I’m sorr—” we both started at the same time. Then we each released a self-conscious laugh.

I longed for the days when we were completely comfortable with each other, when we both knew what we wanted. Or thought we did.

“You told me to go out with him,” I said quietly.

“I didn’t mean it. I mean, I was upset. But if I had meant it, I would have been talking about going to a movie for a couple of hours, not trekking through the woods for days—and certainly not putting your life at risk.”

“I’m a Dark Guardian. That’s my job.”

“You’re a novice. You can’t heal like we do. You can’t transform, and you can’t escape as easily if there’s danger.”

“You’re not mad about the danger,” I said softly.

“Do you want to be with him? I mean, are you going to choose him?”

“I don’t know, Connor. But he’s not the only reason I’m here. I asked to come because I wanted to help. Maybe because we found Dallas, and I feel partly responsible for his death.”

Connor looked shocked by my words. “It’s not your fault.”

“In a way it is, because of the whole blackberries incident—but whatever. I wanted to feel useful; I wanted to take an active part in making Bio-Chrome pay. I didn’t want to guide birdwatchers. It’s not the first time I’ve opted for adventure over the ordinary.”

Some of Connor’s anger dissipated, and his mouth twitched toward a smile. I knew he was remembering a dozen occasions when I’d convinced him to do something that eventually got us into trouble. I didn’t always think through to the ramifications of my choices, but we’d always had fun.

Gently, he tucked my hair behind my ear. “Do you…do you love him?”

He wouldn’t say Rafe’s name, as though if we talked about him in the abstract, he wouldn’t be significant. I told him the truth.

“I don’t know. I didn’t expect it to be this hard. Kayla said she felt an instant connection with Lucas, and Brittany doesn’t feel a soul-deep connection with anyone. I care about both you and Rafe. I don’t want to hurt either one of you, and I worry that I’ll make the wrong decision.”

“Maybe you need to stop worrying about it. Just”—he sighed—“let us figure it out.”

By us, I knew he meant him and Rafe. I scoffed. “Yeah, that’s gonna work.”

“I was winning,” he said petulantly.

It was such a guy thing to say.

“I thought you were the one who wanted us to be more civilized,” I reminded him.

“Hey, I was civilized. I didn’t shift.”

Any other time, I would have laughed. Instead, leaning over, I put my head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry I don’t know the answer.”

“Yeah. Me, too.”

He put his arm around me and we sat there for a while, just absorbing the feel of each other. We were always like this. We were each other’s rock. But did it make us each other’s destiny?

After a while, we got up and walked back into the main part of the cavern. It didn’t even register with me that we were holding hands—until I saw Rafe leaning against a wall and his gaze dipped to where our hands were joined. A storm of emotions passed through his eyes.

“I’ll keep watch tonight,” he said tersely, and he strode out of the cavern before anyone could respond.

I wanted to go after him, but Connor squeezed my hand. Was it a silent plea to stay with him, or a reminder that we’d been together forever? How loyal was I supposed to be while I figured things out?

“I’ll fix us a place to sleep,” he said quietly.

I glanced over to where Connor was laying out a sleeping bag on the opposite side of the cavern from where Kayla was preparing one for her and Lucas. I rubbed my hands up and down my arms. I’d never slept beside Connor. If he was truly my destined mate, shouldn’t I be excited about it instead of worrying that it might be awkward? And could I sleep beside him tonight, knowing that I’d slept beside Rafe last night?

When everything was ready, he took my hand and led me over to the pallet. It took us a while to get settled. I bumped his chin with my head. He chuckled, told me to relax. I shifted around until my back was to him and he was spooned around me. His arm came around me and I threaded my fingers through his. He smelled different than Rafe. He felt different than Rafe.

Lucas turned out the lantern and plunged us into darkness. I could hear him and Kayla talking low, like lovers do.

“This doesn’t feel right, Connor,” I whispered.

“Okay, roll over and put your head on my