Master Flea by E. T. A. Hoffmann (drm ebook reader .txt) 📕

he did not hesitate to throw himself between the champions with a similar declaration. To this the combatants were forced to yield. Swammerdam, moreover, asserted that he had not at all come with hostile intentions, but merely to enter into some composition with Leeuwenhoek, and thus to end a feud which had so long divided two similarly-created principles, whose united researches only could exhaust the deepest springs of knowledge. With this he looked smilingly at Peregrine, into whose arms Dörtje had fled, and expressed a wish that he would mediate.

Leeuwenhoek, on the other hand, admitted that Dörtje was indeed the apple of contention, but that he had just now discovered a new trick of his unworthy colleague. It was not only that to revive his unjust pretensions to Dörtje, he denied the possession of a certain microscope which he had received on a certain occasion as a quittance, but the more to torment him⁠—Leeuwenhoek⁠—he had given it to another. In answer to all this, Swammerdam swore, high and low, that he had never received the microscope, and had great reason to believe that Leeuwenhoek had shamefully purloined it.

“The fools!” softly whispered Master Flea to Peregrine, “The fools! they are talking of the microscope which is in your eye. You know that I was present at the treaty of peace concluded between them about the possession of the princess, and, when Swammerdam was flinging into the pupil of his left eye the microscopic glass which he had, in fact, received from Leeuwenhoek, I snapped it up, because it was not Leeuwenhoek’s, but my lawful property. Tell them plainly at once, that you have the jewel.”

Upon this Peregrine made no hesitation in declaring that he was in possession of the microscopic glass which Swammerdam should have received, but did not receive, from Leeuwenhoek, and moreover that the union was not yet settled, and neither Leeuwenhoek nor Swammerdam had at present the unconditional right to look on Dörtje Elverdink as his foster-daughter.

After much argument, it was agreed by the disputants that Mr. Tyss should marry Dörtje Elverdink, who tenderly loved him, and then after seven months, should decide which of the two microscopists was the most desirable father-in-law.

However beautiful Dörtje appeared in a dress so admirable that it might seem to have been fashioned by the Loves, and whatever burning looks of passion she might cast at Peregrine, yet he still thought of his protégé as well as of his friend, and remained true to his plighted word, declaring again that he renounced Dörtje’s hand. The microscopists were not a little astonished when Peregrine announced George Pepusch for the man who had the justest claims to the princess, and that he, at all events, had no right to interfere with her choice.

With tears in her eyes the maiden staggered towards Peregrine, who caught her in his arms as she was sinking senseless to the earth. “Ingrate!” she sighed. “You break my heart in thrusting me from you. But you will have it. Take, then, my parting kiss, and let me die!”

Peregrine bent down to her, but when his mouth touched her mouth, she bit his lips so violently that the blood started, at the same time exclaiming merrily, “Monster! it is so one must punish you! Be reasonable, be civil, and take me, let the other cry out as he will.”

During this the two microscopists had fallen together by the ears again, heaven knows wherefore, while George Pepusch flung himself quite disconsolately at Gamaheh’s feet, and cried out in a voice that sounded wretched enough for any lover⁠—

“Oh, Gamaheh! is then your passion quite extinguished? Do you no more remember the glorious times in Famagusta? no more the pleasant days in Berlin? no more⁠—”

“You are a fool!” interrupted the little one, laughing, “You are a fool, George, with your Gamahehs, your Thistle, Zeherit, and all the other nonsense that you must once have dreamed. I did like you, do like you, and will have you⁠—although the tall one yonder pleases me better⁠—if you solemnly promise, nay swear, to bend all your mind to⁠—”

Here she softly whispered something to Pepusch, and Peregrine thought he collected that Master Flea was the subject of it. In the meantime the dispute between the microscopists had grown hotter and hotter; they had again recourse to their weapons, and Peregrine was busy in trying to sooth their wrath, when the company was again augmented. The door was burst open amidst a strange screaming and croaking, and in rushed the Amateur, Monsieur Legénie, and the barber, Leech. With wild, furious gestures they flew upon the princess, and the barber had already caught her by the shoulder, when Pepusch thrust away the odious assailant with irresistible might, wound about his whole flexible body, and squeezed it together in such a manner that he shot up into the air, quite thin and long, roaring aloud with pain all the time.

While this was going on with the barber, the two microscopists had reconciled themselves in an instant on the appearance of the common enemy, and made a united attack on the Amateur with much success. It availed him nothing that when he was sufficiently drubbed below, he rose up to the ceiling, for Leeuwenhoek and Swammerdam had both seized short thick sticks, and whenever the Amateur descended, they drove him up again by blows, dexterously applied to that part of the body which best can bear them. It was a pretty game of racket, at which the Amateur by compulsion indeed played the most fatiguing⁠—and at the same time the most ungracious⁠—part, namely that of the ball.

This war seemed to inspire the little one with the greatest terror; she clung to Peregrine, and entreated him to bear her away from such an abominable uproar. This he could the less refuse, as there seemed to be no need of him on the field of battle, and he therefore carried her home, that is, into the apartments of his lodger. But no sooner had she got