Mister Romance by Amelia Simone (the reading list .txt) 📕

up,” Vicki said in a deep tone that reminded me of the voice-over actors in a horror movie. It wasn’t quite the knell of doom, but it felt close.

“Yes. It’s a good thing I love my brother, or I’d be trying to give myself food poisoning as a healthy alternative to attending.” My face lightened thinking of Chase. “Luckily I was able to rope a friend into going with me and running interference with all the nosy aunts and uncles.”

“Is your family that bad?” asked Vicki.

I played with the wrapper from my straw, folding and unfolding it in my fingers.

“Relatively speaking, no. They’re not trying to get me hooked on drugs or borrow large sums of money.” I squinted my eyes as I continued, “Though I’ve got my eye on my niece. She keeps trying to hit me up for cash. Then again, she’s five, and a quarter is well within my budget.”

Gina nodded solemnly. “I’ve seen that niece of yours. She’s trouble. I think you’re right to be wary.”

Vicki shook her head at us. “I can tell I’m getting nowhere with you both trolling me. Really, what’s the worst that would happen if you didn’t have a friend to go with you?”

I shrugged. “Meh. Nothing much. I’ll just have the same conversation twenty times. ‘What are you doing? Oh, you deliver babies? Too bad you’re not a doctor. But nursing. Isn’t that nice. Don’t you want to have some kids of your own? Better get on that. You’re not getting any younger. Say, isn’t Nick younger than you? How old are you now, anyway? Over thirty? Man, better find a husband.’ And I’ll wish, yet again, for that bout of food poisoning. Lying on the cold, slightly grimy tile floor of a public bathroom feeling like I’m going to die would be more pleasant than the ongoing inquisition.”

Gina shuddered delicately at my description. “Don’t joke about food poisoning.”

Vicki looked up at the ceiling before dropping her gaze to mine. “I undercook the chicken, one time ... As brilliant as food poisoning is as a solution, can’t you tell them to shove off?”

“We Shaws are next-level passive-aggressive. I’d say you’d find us next to that entry in the dictionary, but if anyone from my family saw it first, they’d rip the page out and cluck their tongue in pity that the printer did such a poor-quality job. Direct confrontation is not how we roll. My parents left the state for years to avoid their relatives. Maybe also their own kids. No one wants to rock the boat now that they’re finally gracing us with a visit.”

“Is there a less confrontational way to get them off of your back?” she pressed.

I nodded emphatically. “Yes. And I’ve already found it. Chase is going with me as my beard.”

“Honey, I’m pretty sure you’re straight,” Gina chided me gently. “Don’t go throwing around things you don’t mean.”

“I’m sorry.” That was tactless, and I was kicking myself. “I shouldn’t joke, I know it’s not funny when you’ve been there trying to come out to family. I just mean that he’s giving me a little air cover.”

Vicki and Gina accepted my apology with grace, which is part of why I loved them both. They were crazy supportive and low drama to hang out with, even when I made an ass of myself.

“Chase will be a good distraction. Whether or not people think we’re dating, I honestly don’t care, but hopefully it will stem the worst of the comments.”

Gina huffed. “Well, you’d better drink a lot, so they don’t ask if you’re pregnant.”

I laughed. “There’s a reason we’re friends.”

Gina grinned back at me.

“Tell us more about Chase,” Vicki probed. “What kind of guy writes romance novels?”

“Do I detect a hint of attitude there, Judgey Judy? Have you ever read a Virginia Rothman book? They’re really good. Strong women, great friendships, and well-developed characters. You might like them,” I said with a smile.

“Yeah, but what kind of guy writes romance novels? What’s he like?” she pushed.

I gusted out a breath. “I don’t know. He’s got two legs and a face. What appears to be a human-shaped male body. He cooks like a dream. He’s kept his calm and hasn’t sprinted from the building anytime I talk about what I do at work or get into the gore of labor and delivery. He actually seems interested. Honestly, I think he is interested, but possibly because he considers me research.”

It was entirely possible that my growing feelings for Chase were one-sided. Revealing even this much to Gina and Vicki made my gut clench, but it was time to face the truth before I made a mistake. I was developing a massive crush on Chase.

“Hmm ...” Gina murmured. “Has he acted interested in something more than friendship?” she asked.

I rubbed my forehead. “I don’t think so. I’m more attuned to vital signs than I am to flirting ones.”

Vicki leaned forward. “Does he lean into your body space when you talk?”

I tilted my head. “Maybe? I guess he scooted closer to me at the dinner table the other night. But it may have been to refill my glass of wine.”

Gina took her turn. “Ooh, so is he attentive to your needs? Does he notice if you need more wine or something’s not right?”

My head tilted the other direction. “Kind of. He asked if I had any food allergies, so I guess that counts?”

Vicki looked me deeply in the eyes. “Okay. Truth time. Does he make you tingle?”

My lips turned up at her phrasing. “He’s very distracting. And he gives good hugs.” Thinking of his warm body pressed against mine sent a shiver down my spine.

“Okay, that’s a start. We can work with that,” Gina said, rubbing her hands together.

Vicki peered at me more closely. “You still don’t seem convinced of his romantic potential.”

“It’s not the potential that I have concerns about,” I acknowledged. “It’s the dishonesty.”

Saying it aloud should have made it feel more real. A concrete reason to push my feelings