Restart Again: Volume 2 by Adam Scott (hardest books to read txt) 📕

I trailed off, pausing to find the right words. “I don’t know if I want to keep going.” Saying the words aloud finally made real the thoughts that had been hanging over me. “What’s the point in fighting? I’m not fighting for anything, just...the habit of it. It’s all I’m useful for now, and I’m not even good at it anymore.” I ran my hand over the cold marble lid before me. “We should have left like you wanted. Jaren would have understood.”

Digging down through the layers of winter clothing, I found my bandolier strapped against my chest and pulled the slim silver needle from its clasp at the top. “That reminds me. It isn’t all bad news today. I’ve almost finished the universal needle.” I held it out at arm’s length and admired it. “It works for the first three orbs autonomously, and the fourth one works with concentration. I think with some clever rearrangements I’ll have a fully realized design—”

A spasm shook my arm and sent the needle clattering to the floor. I held it steady with my free hand and waited for the shaking to stop, grunting as waves of pain flooded down to my fingertips. When the episode subsided, I moved unsteadily to where the silver needle had landed and slotted it back into my bandolier. “Sorry,” I apologized to nobody, embarrassed.

From behind me, a faint beeping sound began to chime from the golden cylinder. I glared at it angrily and let out a defeated sigh. “Power’s almost out. It’s time for me to go.” I turned to retrieve the beeping device, but stopped myself and moved to the sarcophagus instead. I knelt down and rested my forehead gently against the stone. “I’m so sorry, Alda. I hope you can forgive me,” I whispered, every word threatening to catch in my tight throat. “I’m sorry. Forever.”

With a heavy cough, I stood and returned to the entrance. I pulled the cylinder from its slot and returned it to my pocket, which caused the stone door to slide open once more. The harsh wind immediately chilled my face as I walked outside into the elements and began my trek back down the hill. I looked over my shoulder just in time to see the door close again and plunge the interior of the crypt back into darkness. “I’m so sorry.”

---

The shaft of light I was basking in had shifted up to my face and shone down relentlessly on my eyes, waking me from my nap. I sat up lazily and rubbed my face, and was surprised to find it wet with tears. Quickly scanning the wagon, I was relieved to find Lia napping across from me, slumped awkwardly in the corner. I wiped the tears from my face, cleared my throat quietly, and attempted to suppress the memories of Hedaat.

Lia woke up an hour later with a large stretch, which brought a pained expression to her face. She rubbed her neck tenderly and attempted a few cautious shoulder rolls. When she finally noticed that I was watching her, she quickly turned her face away. “Good morning, Lux—” Lia cut herself off. “Oh, I mean, good afternoon. No...umm…”

I watched as she struggled awkwardly to find the right expression, doing my best to keep a straight face. My face broke out into a grin, and I quickly gave up resisting and laughed heartily. “Good morning to you too, Lia. How did you sleep?”

She put a hand on her shoulder and pressed gently against the muscle. “It’s hard to find a good place to sleep in here.”

“I could remove those for you,” I said, motioning to her cuffed wrists. “It might be easier for you to—”

Lia shook her head. “No, it’s okay. I don’t want to cause any more trouble for you.”

I moved to respond but decided against it. I already know where this conversation goes. “How about some meditation, then? I find that it can do wonders for sore muscles.”

“Actually, I was hoping we could talk about...things.” Lia spoke quietly as she fidgeted with her hands in her lap.

I sat up straight and gave her an encouraging nod. “Of course.”

She took a deep breath, held it for a beat, then sighed. “Okay. I wanted to say I’m sorry for letting you down in Atsal.”

“Lia, you didn’t—” I stopped when she held up a hand in protest.

“I’ve finally figured out what I want to say, and I want to say it all at once. Is that okay?” I nodded in silent agreement and let her continue. “I’m sorry for Atsal. I let my guard down and didn’t pay attention to my surroundings. I panicked when the guard grabbed me and didn’t think about how to get away until it was too late. You taught me those things, and I forgot them when it was most important.

“After we were taken, I wasn’t thinking straight. The only thought going through my head was that I let you down, and you were going to have to leave me behind because of that. My brain was all fuzzy after the fight and I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry.” She chuckled to herself. “And that’s what I did. But I knew deep down that I was wrong. I knew you didn’t blame me for anything, and that you wouldn’t leave me behind.”

Lia spoke with confidence as she continued. “We wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for my mistakes, and I’m really sorry for that. I know that this situation is what you were trying to avoid above everything else, and I’m going to try my hardest to make it up to you. I’m going to practice and train every day to make sure this doesn’t happen again. No matter what happens when we get back to Yoria, I’m not going to leave your side.” She paused for a moment, then added, “If you’ll have me, of course.”

My jaw dropped as she finished. “Lia…” I managed to