The Elephant Whisperer: My Life With the Herd in the African Wild by Lawrence Anthony (the ebook reader txt) 📕

‘Here at the house. They’re on the front lawn.’

‘Our front lawn? Our elephants … ?’

‘Come … get dressed.’

I rushed back to Françoise.

‘You’d better wash before you come near me,’ she said, pointing at me with feigned revulsion on her face. I looked at her, perplexed, then put my hand on my chest to feel a gooey, sticky mess.

‘Your head,’ she said, wrinkling her nose. ‘It’s also all over your head.’

I strode over to the mirror and saw exactly what she meant. I was covered in pachyderm slime. I must have had a half a pint of mucous from Nana’s trunk spread all over me.

‘I’ll wash later. David is joining us on the verandah. Let’s go and watch.’

I let Max out of the bathroom and the three of us sneaked across the lawn to the rangers’ house, keeping a sharp eye out for any stray jumbos and then went out onto the front verandah. Here Françoise had a grandstand view of the herd destroying her cherished garden; they pushed over trees, toreapart her favourite bushes and ate every flower they could find. I must say she seemed less entranced by the visit than I was.

David came out and joined us. ‘This is unbelievable. They’re all here,’ he said, eyes straining against the gloom, ‘except Mnumzane.’

‘No, he’s here too. I saw him earlier.’

David found him standing alone in the dark about twenty yards away. ‘Poor guy. They tolerate him, but only just. He’s got no adult relatives so he’s always a Johnny-come-lately. I really hope he turns out OK.’

‘He’s a big boy,’ I replied. ‘He’ll be fine.’

Nana looked up from the garden she was demolishing and with a bunch of prized shrubs in her mouth ambled over to us. Max, who had moved a few paces onto the lawn, silently retreated to the relative safety of the verandah and then followed Françoise when I suggested she go inside in case Nana got too close.

It was something I just couldn’t get used to; the daunting vision of this gargantuan form looming ominously closer, apparently fixated on demonstrating her affection by standing right next to me. It was like having an infatuated Tyrannosaurus rex showering attention on you. What was even more mind-blowing was that not that long ago she would happily have killed me.

We decided to play it safe and David and I moved back inside the double door and watched her imposing bulk approach. She stopped at the low verandah wall and for the second time that dark morning stretched out her trunk to me. She couldn’t reach me, so I decided to hang back and watch and wait.

However, I underestimated her persistence – and her strength. Frustrated at my reluctance to come to her, she decided to come to me, trying to squash her vast frame between the two brick pillars that straddled the verandahentrance. This obviously didn’t work, and we watched openmouthed as she then gently placed her forehead on the left pillar and gave an exploratory shove.

That certainly got my attention. I remembered what she had done to the gate poles at the boma and had no doubt she would bring the whole verandah roof down if she wanted to. I hastily stepped forward and she stopped shoving and lifted her trunk. Once again she snaked it over the top of my body. It was a good thing I hadn’t changed for I received another liberal basting of slime, while the sound of her deep rumbling stomach reverberated through the house, drowning out the thumping of my heart.

Satisfied, she eventually ambled away and joined the rest of the clan as they finished off the few remaining exotic plants in Françoise’s now obliterated garden.

Then suddenly an eight-week-old kitten we had slipped past us and completely oblivious of the herd walked out onto the lawn. We only noticed after it was too late and watched in horror – there was nothing we could do to get her back as she was now among the herd. The elephants got very interested in this tiny thing and all sauntered over for a close inspection. Still the tiny cat didn’t react – I think these alien creatures around it were simply too big for it to comprehend, just as they had been for Bijou. Soon it was surrounded and as the elephants put their trunks out, waving the tips around this tiny curiosity, it would swipe at them with its paw, playing with them.

Eventually the elephants got tired of it and walked off, leaving the kitten alone on the middle of the lawn.

Except Frankie. She initially walked away, and then when she was about twenty yards off, she suddenly turned and ran at it. It was a sight I don’t think I will ever see again – a five-ton elephant charging a five-ounce cat.

The kitten finally realized something was wrong and skittered back to us just in time.

We stayed up watching until 5 a.m. when, at the first hint of light, Nana moved off with the herd in tow. They were soon eaten up by the dense bush.

I stared after them. A sense of emptiness seeped into my universe. A part of me was leaving with them.

chapter eighteen

Later that morning I woke with a glorious glow of satisfaction. The herd’s visit to our home had graphically demonstrated that we had made substantial progress. To think that not so long ago I was begging for their lives while the Parks Board issued elephant rifles to their rangers with ‘shoot on sight’ instructions. Now I was trying to keep them out of our living room.

It seemed the rehabilitation of the herd was all over bar the shouting and we had reason to celebrate our achievements. But whoever came up with the maxim ‘pride comes before a fall’ certainly knew what he was talking about.

I was enjoying a leisurely late breakfast, still replaying Nana’s extraordinary nocturnal display of affection in my mind when I was bumped back to earth by a frantic