D-Notice by Bill Walker (books to read for self improvement txt) 📕

Michael stood, throwing up his hands. “That’s just too bloody rich. You love two men. Is that what you’re asking me to believe?”

“It’s true!” she said, her voice filling the room.

“Oh, I’m sure it is,” he said, rubbing the place above his right eye. “After all I’ve been through, why should this surprise me.”

Lillian bit her lip. “I’ll give you a divorce.”

“NO!” Michael shouted, making Lillian flinch. “No divorce. I just want to know one thing. The baby. Is it mine?”

She stared at him, her expression becoming resolute for the first time. “Yes.”

“I want to believe you, but how do you know?”

“Because Paul—”

“Please,” he said, cutting her off with another wave of his hand. “I don’t want to know anything about him, do you hear me? His name, where he comes from—nothing.”

“I—I’m sorry. You asked me how I know. I can’t tell you in concrete terms. It’s just something a woman knows. If that doesn’t satisfy you, then you’re free to go. I won’t stand in your way.” She began to cry once more. “I’ve always thought you were too good for me.”

She began to sob in earnest then, burying her face in her hands. Thorley could stand it no longer, for the stunning truth of it all was that he still adored her, even after the knowledge of her infidelity stood revealed in the ugly light of dawn. He reached for her and took her in his arms. She melted against him, her arms wrapping around him with viselike intensity, the tears coming all the harder.

After five minutes she calmed down, and without releasing her hold on him asked, “What do you want to do, Michael?”

He could tell from the tentative sound of her voice, the quaver in it, that she was afraid of what he would say, or perhaps of what he wouldn’t. He pushed her back, holding her by the shoulders, her face only inches from his own. He could smell her perfume and the faint scent of something else. Was it his cologne?

“What I wanted is for our lives to return to the moment before I saw you get out of that car,” he said, his voice a gentle whisper. “But I know now that it was all a sham.”

“Michael, I—”

He silenced her with a finger to her lips. “Please, hear me out. What I want, now, is for us to remain together, and for us to raise our child in a home that is filled with love...and trust. You said you still loved me. Do you really mean that?”

“More than ever....”

Michael nodded. “All right, then, whoever he is, you will give him up, tell him you’ll never see him again. If we are going to make this work, I have to know that you’re willing to do this, otherwise when I walk out that door, it’s forever. Do you understand?”

“Yes, I’ll tell him,” she said, nodding. “Today.”

For the first time since he’d come home that morning, Michael smiled. He kissed her then. And rather than feeling mounting passion as he normally would, he felt something different and even more profound: a sense that a corner had been turned in their lives, that their love would survive and be stronger for it. It was more feeling than thought and it suffused his body with a warmth that was unmistakable.

The room brightened considerably when the sun peaked over the horizon. Breaking the kiss, he glanced at the clock on the wall. “Christ, it’s after six! I’m going to miss the bloody boat!”

“What time does it sail?”

“Seven. From the Prince Albert Docks.”

She grabbed for her wrap and headed for the stairs. “We’ll take the Morgan. At this hour I’ll have you there with time to spare.”

Luckily, Lillian had recently filled the tank with their month’s ration of petrol. The traffic was sparse all the way to the docks with only a few heavily-laden lorries getting in the way. And while she rarely drove, Lillian handled the little three-wheeled touring car with aplomb, taking turns at speeds most drivers would have avoided. And true to her word, by taking the Blackwall Tunnel, they arrived at the dock gate at 6:45. The gangway to the ship was still in place and Thorley could see a line of soldiers still waiting to be checked in.

“Where’re your things?” Lillian asked, noticing for the first time that he had no luggage with him.

“Already on board, though it won’t matter very much. None of it’s tropical issue.”

“I hate these goodbyes.”

“So do I,” he replied, a lump forming in his throat. “Part of me doesn’t want to go.”

She reached for his arm and gave it a firm, assuring squeeze. “You don’t have to worry, Michael, it’s over. I swear it.”

“I know.”

“And why only a part of you?” A tiny smile had formed on her lovely mouth.

It took him a moment to realize what she meant. “Oh.... I guess there’s a part of me that’s excited. Silly, isn’t it.”

“Not at all,” she said, kissing him on the nose. “Did I tell you how handsome you are in that uniform?”

Thorley smiled. “No, you didn’t.”

“Well, you are, just the same. And I’m going to miss you so very much.” She clasped him to her, tears coursing down her face once again. “Bloody hell, I promised myself I wasn’t going to do this.”

“I’ll get word to you where to write me. I want to know how you and the baby are doing every day, and I’d like you to move out of London and go down to the cottage.”

Lillian nodded, wiping her eyes on the back of