Something Old by Rebecca Connolly (autobiographies to read txt) 📕

have married you when I was desperate for funds,” he admitted hoarsely, averting his gaze. “When I felt what I did and then to fall in such a way, to crawl to your father…”

Lily shook her head, taking his face in her hands and forcing him to look at her. “You could have come to me. I would have said yes regardless, just as my father did, but with better reasons. Would that not have helped ease your conscience?”

“More than you know.” He pulled her hands from his face, kissing the palms of each before cupping them together and kissing them again. “I’ve been a coward, my darling girl. I know it, and you know it. There’s no atoning for that.”

“Stop.” She shook her head, swallowing hard and resting her brow against his chest. “Stop. I don’t think you’re a coward. I think we have both been foolish and silent for far too long.”

He laughed once and kissed the top of her head. “You’re too generous with me. I’ve been a great deal more than simply foolish and silent. I’ve neglected you. Avoided you for fear of being overcome.”

Lily frowned and turned her face, wrapping her arms around him now. “Overcome with what?” she whispered.

“I haven’t felt worthy of showing you how I felt, not in the slightest. I needed to… I had to…” His hold on her tightened slightly, his mouth pressing against her hair for a moment as he exhaled. “From the day I took my vows, I also vowed that I would recover my finances so that it would no longer be a marriage for mercenary reasons. With that hanging over my head, I could not bring myself to love you in truth.”

“But…” Lily bit her lip in thought, then looked up at him with heated cheeks. “Our wedding night…”

The dark of the night prevented her from seeing if he, too, were embarrassed by the topic, but he cleared his throat and put a hand to her heated cheek. “I decided that my duty was to consummate the marriage, and in doing so, it would bind me to you in a way that I could not otherwise do. I hope… I prayed that… that it wasn’t… that I didn’t…”

Pity swelled within her, and Lily put her fingers to his lips, silencing him gently. “I have no complaints about that night, Thomas. None. Aside from your leaving me almost at once. What transpired… There are no complaints for my part.”

The rush of his exhale brought her to tears, and his near exultant kiss made her heart soar. She wrapped her hand around his neck, pressing up into the kiss now, feeling the years of distance and pain begin to fall away.

“Gads,” Thomas breathed, his lips dusting from her mouth across her cheek. “How could I have avoided you for so long? How could I deny us this?”

Lily sighed her agreement as she arched her neck, clung to him for strength. “I’ve done my part to avoid you as well.”

He laughed against her cheek and placed a delicate kiss below her ear. “You had better reasons, I think.”

“You said in London that you wanted to begin again,” Lily murmured, gently bringing his face back to hers. She pressed her brow and nose to his, wishing she could see deep into his soul, as she wanted him to see into hers. “That was why we came here. Did you mean that? Truly?”

“Yes,” Thomas replied firmly, his hand sliding back a little farther to grip into her hair. “I want to begin again. Even now, since I’ve bungled the attempt since we’ve been here. Events almost every night and business during the day… I’ve turned Cornwall into London, haven’t I?”

Lily laughed a little, pulling back just enough so they no longer touched. “A bit, but I haven’t made much of an effort to do better. It’s our natural way now, isn’t it? Circle around each other rather than with each other.”

“Not anymore.” Thomas shook his head and stroked her cheek, a furrow appearing between his brows. “Not anymore, Lily. I don’t care if I miss every meeting and every appointment arranged for me while I’m here, I’ll spend every moment with you. Every one.”

“Oh, nonsense,” Lily told him with another small laugh. “More time will be enough. It does not have to be constant. Perhaps we take things one step at a time and not all at once, hmm?”

He nodded, leaning in for a soft kiss that wrung the strength from her knees with its sweetness. “Very well. Tomorrow, I’m seeing one of the mines I’ve invested in. Would you come with me?”

“I would love to.”

Chapter Thirteen

Wheal Venton was an older, established mine in the area and one of the consistently profitable ones. Not one bursting extravagantly with either copper or tin, but steadily producing for her shareholders, which all agreed was a far more comfortable prospect. The miners themselves were healthy, which was fortunate, and the wages paid them were, by all accounts, considered fair and equal. This was a right sight better than what some of the other mines in the area were paying their workers, which could barely be considered starvation wages.

Thomas wouldn’t let that happen to Wheal Venton so long as he had shares in her. He was in the process of procuring more of them, taking a majority by doing so, and growing closer to taking full ownership of her. He likely would not rid the mine of all other shareholders, as it would be of use to have the input of others besides himself and the mine captain when it came to decisions regarding the place, but he certainly would not mind taking the responsibility chiefly upon himself.

He’d been engaging in business talks with the shareholders of this mine, as well as shareholders of others, in the days since they’d come to Cornwall, but he had yet to see the place for himself. He’d gone over numbers and figures