Crucifixed (Royal Bastards MC: NYC Book 2) by B.B. Blaque (best books to read for self development .TXT) 📕

not like all the answers I got for ya, so I’ll say it as many times as it takes . . . I love you in a way I can barely understand. Fuck, I even prayed today if that tells ya anything.”

Her hand fell loosely to the side of a knee, but didn’t reach over to me.

“You . . . prayed?” Her blue eyes glistened and her voice was just above a whisper. “What did you pray, G . . .?”

I didn’t move my hand from the bed, but took a drag off my smoke and ran that hand through my hair. There was so much she didn’t know and stuff I didn’t either. She could only handle a small piece of it at a time.

“Ah . . . ya know . . . I asked God to make sure you were safe . . . told him not to worry about me. I prayed those prayers for you a lot over the years, and then one day . . . I just stopped. I’m sure you have all kinds of shit goin’ through your head about what went down. I just felt like it was a good time to ask for a little help, ya know? I’m sure it’s all funguliated in your mind . . . what’s what, who’s who, and who’s a rotten piece of shit. I guarantee it’s not us. That guy . . . not sure if you even know his name . . . the one who bought you. He’s not a piece of shit either. He was a gift from God . . . on our side, if ya can believe that one.”

Fi was slowly unwindin’ and stretched a leg out a little. She kept lookin’ at me quick and then away. We’d been in a lot of fucked-up positions over the years, but nothin’ like that.

“The Bishop. That’s his name. He’s really scary . . . but he didn’t hurt me. That other one . . . the guy who was wearing a vest like yours . . . he touched me in ways . . .” Her eyes drifted away and she brought a hand to her mouth. I could hear the tears in her voice as she tried to speak. “Only you’ve ever touched me like that, Crucifix. Why did you let him do that? He was there night and day after you kicked me out . . . you never came, though.”

Motherfucker! I’m glad he’s dead!

“Where was he? I wouldn’t let anyone do anything to you!” I pulled back quick and stopped myself before goin’ off. Don’t get up! Don’t yell. “I didn’t have anything to do with any of the shit that went on. Until that nun came to visit me at the Mounds, I was tryin’ . . . unsuccessfully . . . to get over you. She told me about what those fuckin’ black and white cookies were plannin’ on doin’, and I hooked up with The Bishop to get you the fuck outta there! I don’t know how the fuck Rattler . . . that scumbag you saw . . . got involved, but it was not club related I can tell ya that much.”

Her hands were runnin’ back and forth on a leg and she shook her head hard. Then she looked stronger and the tears stopped.

“Sister Isabella came to you? I told her everything when you sent me away . . . we knew something bad was happening. I can’t believe she came to your club for me . . . that you came.” Finally, she reached a hand to mine. “That Rattler guy was guarding me at the old rectory. He brought me to the auction . . . he almost raped me . . . just about did in every way he could rape someone who’s supposed to be a virgin. Then some lady who works for that Bishop took me away from him. I didn’t see him until I was brought here. When I saw that it was him . . . the guard . . . and he was at your clubhouse . . .” She squeezed my hand. “Crucifix . . . I thought it was because I hurt you one too many times . . . that you snapped. I thought . . . I was afraid that guy sold me to you. I don’t know . . . that you were going to kill me or something. I know it sounds crazy, but the whole thing is nuts.”

I patted her hand and opened an arm to bring her over for a hug. When Fi leaned into my chest, I finally started to breathe.

“Baby, I would never harm you. You’re my oldest connection in the entire world . . . my first real friend . . . my first and only love. When I didn’t have a family . . . you were it, kid. We were all we had.” I pulled back, kissed the top of her head, and stroked her hair. “Are you gettin’ it now? You’re the most important person who’s ever been in my life. I love the fuck outta you and have from the first time I shared my food with you.”

She looked up to me while her grip around me tightened. “I love you too, Crucifix . . . please, let me try to make it up to you. It’s all my fault.”

There’ll be time for penance later. Not now.

“We’re not gonna go playin’ the blame game. I also told ya you might not like some of the shit I gotta tell ya. You didn’t ask, but I’ll try to make it as digestible as I can.” I slid back a little so I could look at her. “Some of the stuff . . . well, in a nutshell . . . I wanted to