Flirting with His Forbidden Lady--A Regency Family is Reunited by Laura Martin (good novels to read txt) 📕

Leonard Ashburton was, he had an undeniable soft spot for his brother. He might leave with only a cursory explanation to her, but Josh would have received much more from his brother.

‘Yesterday...’ he began, looking out of the summer house into the distance ‘...on the beach after we...’ It was unlike him to struggle to find the right words.

Yesterday Leonard Ashburton had summoned his brother for a private talk as they walked along the beach. Beth had yearned to know what they had discussed but she’d had to return to Birling View with the rest of the guests and then Josh had been surprisingly absent for the evening meal and after-dinner card games.

‘When Leo arrived on the beach yesterday what he saw between me and you confirmed what he has suspected for a while.’

Beth felt some of the blood drain from her face and leave her with a horrible sick feeling in the pit of her stomach.

‘What did he suspect?’

‘That I care for you. That there is something between us.’ He reached out and placed his hand on the wooden bench next to hers so their fingertips were just touching. ‘He asked me directly what was going on with us, and I couldn’t lie to him.’

Beth shook her head. She knew how it was with a sibling you loved dearly. She could never lie to Annabelle, not if asked a direct question. Her conscience allowed her to omit a few details here and there, but never to lie outright to Annabelle. She couldn’t ask any more of Josh than she could give herself.

‘I told him about the kisses, about how I care for you.’

‘Was he angry?’

‘Not at all.’

Beth grimaced but found she was too interested in what had happened next to dwell on Leonard Ashburton’s indifference to her.

‘So he’s gone.’

‘Yes. Temporarily at least.’

‘Temporarily?’ None of it was making much sense.

‘He wants me to be happy.’ Josh sighed heavily. ‘Sometimes I think he’s more concerned with my happiness than his own. I don’t know if it is guilt that he got to stay here after our parents died, that he is the one who will inherit, that he has had the life that should have been both of ours, but he is very invested in my happiness.’

Beth looked up sharply. She felt her heart start to pound in her chest and her skin begin to tingle. This sounded like a build-up to a declaration, a declaration that could change her whole world, her whole life.

‘He didn’t want to be an obstacle between us, if we had a chance at happiness together. I told him I couldn’t give you what you really needed, the funds to save your family home, but he insisted I consider my future anyway.’

Her lungs began to burn and she realised she was holding her breath.

‘I’ve never felt this way about anyone, Beth. Never.’ Josh picked up her hand and she knew that if he told her he loved her then she was lost. She might hate herself for failing to do her duty, for failing her sister, but she wouldn’t be able to resist him if he promised her love. ‘I know you are determined to marry for duty, to marry someone who can take your family out of debt. I’m not that man. I’m well off, but all my money is tied to the business. One day I will have funds, but not for a few years. If we decided to be together your family would probably lose Birling View.’ He paused as if waiting for her to say something, anything, but Beth’s head was swimming. It wasn’t a declaration of love, but it sounded very much as though he was proposing a future together. Marriage, a whole life by one another’s sides.

‘I don’t know what to say.’ Her head was spinning, her heart surging at the thought of spending a lifetime with Josh but her mind telling her not to be selfish, not to forget her mother and sister.

‘Don’t say anything, not yet. Let me have today. One day with you to myself and perhaps at the end things will be a little clearer for both of us.’

It didn’t seem that much to ask, although Beth couldn’t see how anything would be clearer after one day.

‘What will we do?’

‘Anything we desire. With one another. Up until now everything we’ve done has felt illicit, tainted by the knowledge that it should be Leo you’re spending time with. Let’s have one day without any guilt, without any expectation, just to enjoy one another without thinking too much about the future.’

It wasn’t something she could say no to. It sounded so perfect, so exquisite, and whatever they decided at the end of the day at least they would have had this one day together.

‘You should know Leo said if we decided we did not have a future together and you are still keen for your marriage to him to go ahead he will honour his promise to your father. You should know you have that option.’

Silently Beth nodded. She couldn’t imagine marrying Leonard Ashburton, not now.

‘Where are we going first?’ Beth asked, resolving not to think of the future until much later today. For now she was going to enjoy herself.

‘First we need to raid the kitchen. It is going to be a long day and we will need sustenance.’

‘Mrs Turner will chase us out.’

‘Nonsense. If I can’t charm your cook, then I’ll eat some of the horse’s hay for lunch instead.’

Beth laughed. It felt good just to let go even if she knew all of her problems would still be there this evening.

They half walked, half ran back to the house, ducking behind a scraggly hedge when they spotted Mr Ralph strolling leisurely through the garden. Bursting into the kitchen breathless earned them a sour look from Mrs Turner, and Beth was certain however charming Josh could be wouldn’t be enough to convince their grouchy cook to spend precious time packing them provisions for their day of