Deep (Heavy Hearts Book 2) by Sarah Duncan (reading tree txt) 📕

I may as well confess I was with Travis during the school break-in and vandalism. It plagues me daily that he took the wrap for it. I think now is the time for me to own up to my wrongdoings and stop having people suffer because of me.

Reaching the school office, Mr Matthews turns to the boys.

“If you two are insisting on staying, you need to keep quiet and not talk to Lexi. You are here only as support, so she knows she is safe and that no one will harm her.”

Ayden and Marcus both mutter their agreement, and Mr Matthews points to seats in the small glass room off to the side, aptly called the vault. It’s used to keep watch on students that are in trouble. A glass cell of sorts. Looks like my first visit will be my last visit.

The boys do as they’re asked and don’t speak to me. Their eyes dart to mine frequently, though, and I try to dodge them as much as possible. My shame, my discomfort, it has me prisoner. Nothing can help me now.

Raised voices and yelling spills out from the Principal’s office, drawing our attention. The door swings open with force, revealing a furious, very red-faced Mr and Mrs Pritchard. Tasha’s parents.

Ayden and Marcus quickly stand and move in front of me. At first, I think they are trying to block my view so I can’t see what’s happening, but as the angry words from Tasha’s hysterical mum greet my ears, I realise that Ayden and Marcus are trying to keep me hidden.

“If you don’t do something about Alexis, then we will! I’m sure the news stations would love to hear how Fox Pines Catholic College did nothing to protect the rest of the students and let that little tramp walk the halls and bully everyone!”

I flinch back, guilt hitting me like a ton of bricks knowing that Tasha’s mum’s words speak true. I’ve come back to school, taking out my problems on everyone else. Sure, they may have played a part in harassing me, but doesn’t it speak more to how I dealt with it. I am exactly what Mrs Pritchard says I am. I’m a bully.

The voices trail off and disappear down the hall, so Ayden and Marcus return to their seats in silence. I thought I felt shame before, but it is nothing compared to the shame I feel now. It’s sickening, and I hate who I’ve become.

“Lexi, the principal will see you now.” Mr Matthews appears in the door. Ayden & Marcus stand straight away. “No, guys. Lexi only.”

“No way Mr Matthews. Lexi isn’t going in there alone.” Marcus beats Ayden at voicing his concern. He looks like he’s ready to fight Mr Matthew’s on this one. I don’t want him or Ayden to get into trouble because of me, though.

“It’s okay, Marcus. If you and Ayden can just stay out here, I’ll be okay.”

Both the boys turn to face me, their eyes and grim expressions showing me how torn up they are by the idea of letting me go into the office alone. I love them. Both of them. They are my family—a family not by blood but by bond. I need to tell them they are my family, but it will have to wait. Right now, I have to face up to the things I have done, then later, if they’ll listen, I’ll tell them.

Ayden steps towards me and takes my hand. I shouldn’t let him, but once again, I’m weak and need his touch as much as I need oxygen.

“If you need me, just call out. I’ll break that fucking door down if I have to.” He will too. I know it as much as I know the sun will rise tomorrow.

I give him a small nod, and he brushes his thumb over the back of my hand before dropping it so I can follow Mr Matthews. I feel their eyes on me as I walk, and it somehow helps me put one foot in front of the other, however, a sense of dread sweeps over me. I feel like I’m going to walk into this office and never walk out again. I know it’s completely irrational. Of course, I will walk out again. Right?

Whatever happens, I need to make things right. Not just for me, but for my friends too.

I stop Mr Matthews outside the door before he opens it.

“Mr Matthews?” I ask, gaining his attention. “I’m sorry. I’ve let you down, I know that.”

He sighs, raking a hand over his shiny shaven head, “Let’s talk inside.”

I nod, feeling so ashamed of letting him down and follow him inside to meet the eyes of a very unhappy Principal Rogan. Knowing the drill all too well, I take a seat and wait for Ms Rogan to speak. She doesn’t, but Mr Matthews does.

“Lexi, please tell us, in your own words, what happened in the Media class this afternoon?”

For a few moments, I can’t speak. Sadness, guilt, shame, and regret render me speechless. It takes everything I have to pull myself together enough to relay the comments that Tasha said and how it triggered something in me, and I lost control.

“I don’t know any other way to explain it. It was like someone flicked a switch, and I started doing things. I couldn’t seem to stop myself. I punched her. Several times, and eventually, I wasn’t looking at Tasha’s face anymore.”

“Who were you looking at?” Mr Matthews asks.

“M-my brother. Mike.” I can’t stand to look at Mr Matthews or Mrs Rogan any longer and direct my focus to my shoes. They are old and dirty, and the stitching is coming apart on my right sole.

“A-Ayden came and pulled me off Tasha. I don’t even know where he came from or why he was there because he isn’t in my Media class. But he dragged me away and took me to the hall to-.”

Mr Matthews finishes my sentence, “To cool off. Yeah, that’s when I