No Going Back by Casey Kelleher (bill gates books recommendations TXT) 📕

murder, Ashley. It wasn’t just an attack; the woman was fucking murdered,’ Shelby spat. Thinking how close she’d come to being a victim too. ‘Anything you knew or even suspected should have been said.’ For a split second she wondered why he was confessing all of this to her now. What did he have to gain by coming clean, or more importantly, what did he stand to lose?

‘Oh my god. They’ve got Riley,’ she said, then, as it suddenly dawned on her. ‘That’s why you are telling me all of this, isn’t it? You think they have Riley?’

Ashley looked down at the floor, feeling heartfelt regret for ever getting himself tied up in such a mess.

‘DC Murphy said that it was a line of enquiry that they would be looking in to, yes.’

Shelby was off the bed then. Launching herself at her husband. Beating him repeatedly over the head with clenched fists. Screeching every obscenity she could think of at the man as she directed all her anger, venom and hate towards him.

And Ashley just stood there and took it. Because he knew he deserved it and so much more. He knew that even after the Bolands had warned him they would target Shelby, he’d selfishly still spent the night with Kate. That he’d put himself first throughout all of this. He’d put his own child’s life at risk.

‘Hit me!’ he shouted. ‘Go on, I deserve it. I know I do.’

‘You fucking bastard! You lying piece of shit,’ Shelby screamed, so deep in her rage that she didn’t hear the door of the suite open or the officers all come running in.

DC Lucy Murphy wrapped her arms around her, pulling her away from Ashley.

‘It’s okay, Shelby. It’s going to be okay!’ the officer said, trying to calm her down. Shelby’s whole body was trembling. Violently shaking, filled with fury and rage and something far more powerful than that. Real fear.

‘How can it be okay? Someone has taken my child. My beautiful baby boy. I can’t remember his smell,’ she said then, the realisation coming in a panicked screech. ‘He’s only been gone a few hours. But already I can’t remember his smell. What if he forgets mine? What if he forgets I’m his mum? What if someone hurts him? What if we never get him back?’

Shelby broke into hysterical sobs. As she collapsed into Lucy’s arms, all Lucy could do was hold her, and allow her to let everything out. Until finally Shelby had exhausted herself and pulled away from the officer.

Pete and Janey came back into the room, thankfully having missed most of the outburst.

‘I understand how difficult this is for you both and how distressed you must both feel, but we’ve got a press conference set up to start in fifteen minutes. I need you both to try and stay as calm and composed as possible,’ Lucy said, hoping to finally defuse the situation. ‘We need to do this for Riley. So that we can get him back. Do you think that you can both do that?’

Ashley nodded, holding out his hand to Shelby, asking for a truce. Shelby slapped it away.

‘And I think you should both know that we’ve had a development,’ Lucy said, the grave look on her face getting everyone’s attention. ‘I’m sorry to say that it looks as though the man who attacked you the other night, Shelby, was here at the hospital. We’ve got images of him outside in the car park in the early hours of this morning. We’ve got a name too. Jay-Jay Andrews,’ Lucy said, in the vain hope that someone might recognise it.

Only nobody reacted.

‘He was here? Around the time that Riley went missing?’ Shelby said. An involuntary wail left her mouth before she could even properly register what she was being told. ‘Please God no. Did you see Riley? Did he have Riley with him?’

‘It’s hard to say,’ Lucy said honestly. ‘He had a large bag with him, but we still don’t know anything for sure. I want you to know, because when we do the press appeal, we’ll be focusing it on our search for him.’

Shelby nodded. Robotic, almost, as if she was no longer in control of her emotions or her body.

‘But I need you both to put on a united front. We can’t show him that he’s got to us. We have to show that we have every confidence in getting Riley back. And soon. Very soon. Because we have,’ Lucy said with a fierce determination. She stared at Shelby, willing the woman to see that she meant every word she spoke. ‘We will get him back, Shelby.’

‘We’ll do it. But when it’s done, I’m going home,’ Shelby said defiantly. Dragging her hospital gown over her head, before pulling her tracksuit on and scooping her hair back in a bun. ‘I can’t sit here in this bloody hospital just waiting. The sound of all these crying babies is sending me over the edge. I need to go home.’

‘Of course.’ Lucy nodded in understanding. She knew how hard this must be for Shelby. Desperately pining for her newborn son.

‘Yeah, we can wait for news there, back at the flat,’ Ashley chimed in, thinking that it was at least a start. That they could get home and get Riley back. And then they could start fixing this mess that he’d landed them in.

Only Shelby shook her head.

‘No. I’m not going back to the Griffin Estate. Not after what happened. And not with you. You caused all of this. It’s all your fault. I’m going home. We’re done, Ashley. I don’t want anything to do with you, ever again.’ Then, looking over at her parents, Shelby’s lip quivered with emotion once more as she asked: ‘Can I come home?’

Both her parents nodded without question, and as they hugged her tightly to them, Shelby started to cry silently again.

35

Staring at the TV screen, unable to believe what she had just seen, Imelda listened intently as a reporter announced