A Trick of the Light by Ali Carter (surface ebook reader txt) 📕

‘That’s a fat lot of use,’ said Lianne. ‘Give us a word we’d use.’

‘Zoe taught us baps,’ said Felicity and Lianne’s chest wobbled and wobbled as she tried to suppress a laugh.

‘Sitooterie,’ said Fergus.

‘Conservatory,’ translated Zoe.

‘That’s brilliant,’ said Minty.

‘Why don’t you and Fergus have a Scottish accent?’ said Shane.

‘Scotch,’ corrected Rupert.

‘I’m English,’ said Zoe.

‘And Fergus?’

‘He lost it when he went to boarding school.’

‘On the way there or the way back?’

Even Jane laughed at this.

‘There’ll be no mistaking his roots tonight,’ said Zoe.

‘So he’ll be in a kilt?’ said Minty.

‘Full rigmarole.’

‘I wish I had an outfit to wear,’ mumbled Felicity.

Lianne smiled at me, confident she had a dress for the evening.

‘I could dig some things out if you’d like a swatch?’

‘Swatch?’ said Shane.

‘A touch of tartan,’ said Zoe.

‘Can I have one too?’

‘I might even be able to find you a kilt.’

Giles chortled. ‘I’d love to see you in a skirt.’

‘You might just,’ said Shane, looking hopefully at Zoe.

‘Let’s go and have a look then.’ Up she got. ‘Anyone else want to come?’

‘I will,’ said Minty.

‘And me,’ said Rupert.

Felicity and Lianne joined in too.

Naturally the Muchtons have a bounty of Scots dress. Most heads of families do. A stash of gear ready and waiting to share when engagements are announced. The family-tartan kilts, jabots and shiny buckle shoes all handed down the lineage of eldest sons, with the unspoken prerequisite they are shared with other family members when occasions arise.

If you can picture a wedding snap of a landed Scottish family, you’ll recall the distinctive dress of the page boys. This outfit isn’t made especially for those ones, rather it comes out of a cupboard at the main house smelling of moth balls, having been donned at every-one’s wedding. The same goes for tiaras – at times known to cause a scuffle if the bride’s family own one too. Quite simply the largest is chosen, but this in itself can cause offence.

With fewer people in the dining room I chose my moment to ask Jane if she’d managed to change her flight.

‘You’re leaving,’ exclaimed Giles as if he cared.

‘I’m considering it,’ said Jane with her nose in the air. She didn’t wish to discuss the matter.

‘Think I’m going to have a rest.’ Louis got up and left the room.

‘Me too,’ said Jane.

Mhàiri burst through the swing door, prompting Giles’s departure. Her rough hands were clasped round a tray and I immediately got up to help.

‘You’re a good lass, Susie.’

‘We’re being spoilt here. It’s the least I can do.’

Mhàiri grinned a great big yellow-toothed grin. ‘Are yous looking forward to the ceilidh the night?’

‘Enormously.’

‘You’ll all enjoy it no doubt.’

‘Have they done it here before?’

‘This’ll be Zoe and Fergus’s first. But the elder generation they were always at it.’

Mhàiri’ s tray was now full. ‘Here,’ I said, ‘let me get the door.’

‘Thanks.’

Together we stacked the dishwasher and once done Mhàiri rested her cushioned behind against the counter and asked me how the course was going. She wanted to have a bit of a chat.

‘It’s going well, I think.’

‘Yous like teaching, do yous?’

‘Yes, but I wouldn’t like to do it all the time.’

‘Ever done it afore?’

‘No, but I am enjoying this week. Partly for the teaching but partly because I like meeting new people, getting to know them, learning about who they are, you know.’

‘I certainly do.’ Her eyes sparkled and she lowered her voice. ‘There’s an awful lot yous can learn about folk from what they bring in their suitcase.’

I could feel myself cowering with embarrassment at the misconnection. I certainly didn’t mean spying on people – if that’s what she was getting at. For me, going through people’s belongings is an absolute no no, unless of course it’s reading a letter left lying around. Or looking in a case on which I’ve stubbed my toe. This, one could justify, but not the other.

‘The Frenchman ain’t brought much with him,’ she began, ‘doesn’t have a stable woman in his life, I can tell that. If he did, with her example he’d have hung his clothes in the wardrobe for sure. But nope. They’ve been in his bag fer the day he arrived.’

I was unable to stop her drawing conclusions from people’s belongings; this cook-cum-daily was in full flow and on she went without a pause for breath. ‘That, what’s he called, Little Lord Font-le-Roy has his entire wardrobe ironed, briefs, socks, hankies and all. That rake of a lass, she’s got a stash of pills in her spongebag, and as for the other yun, oh my, her underwear, yous ain’t seen anything like it.’

Mhàiri used the tea towel over her shoulder to wipe a bead of sweat off her top lip. With a bucketful of trepidation I asked, ‘What have you learnt about me?’

‘Not you, pet. There’s a trust between staff. I would nee go searching your room over my dead body.’

I was too alarmed by the thought to smile and when Mhàiri crossed the kitchen to check no one was listening through the door, I really did think, oh heck, what’s coming next…

Her whole body was shaking with anticipation. ‘Just yous wait and see what that lady Jane’s bringing out the night. Quite something buried in her suitcase. Nearly fainted when I found it.’

‘How thrilling,’ I said, only to be nice. A line had been crossed and I absolutely did not want to hear any more. But Mhàiri was shuffling towards me and when she reached up on tiptoes and whispered, ‘Diamonds,’ in my ear, I actually thought her pupils might pop out onto the kitchen floor. Her eyes stretched to their absolute max and then snapped shut. ‘I ain’t telling yous any more.’

‘Okey dokey,’ I said with a smile as inside I let out a huge sigh of relief. ‘See you later, Mhàiri, I’d better go and get brushed up for the evening.’

‘I’m looking forward to seeing your outfit.’ She grinned and turned to the sink.

I burst out the swing door.