Dawn of Eve by MJ Howson (best ereader for students .txt) 📕

phone’s lock screen image of him and his wife seemed to be judging him. He pocketed his primary phone and unlocked the red one. Dr. Cole’s hands trembled as his mind filled with a tsunami of memories of time spent with his wife, the places they’d been, and the love they’d shared. A love he still felt for her today. But was that love enough? How long could he suppress these desires he could never share with Flo? He took a deep breath and replied.

Black coat. Red scarf. Front row.

The bleachers suddenly felt eerily quiet. Dr. Cole began to regret picking such a public setting. Maybe he should have gone with a bookstore on some side street? His heart raced as he began to second guess every decision that had led to this moment. Was this a mistake? He reminded himself there was no commitment. This was nothing more than a meeting. Maybe he could approach this like it was a patient session? Yes, that’s what he should do. Dr. Cole told himself he would do a series of questions to see if Taylor was the real deal. He began to make a mental checklist of the things he’d want to know about Taylor.

“Daniel?”

Dr. Cole jumped at the voice from behind him. At the same time, he found the tenor to be smooth and calming. His breathing stopped momentarily as he slowly turned around.

“Hi. I’m Taylor.” Jacob Jilani stepped over the bench and sat beside the doctor. He held his hand out. “You’re Daniel, right?”

“Hi.” Dr. Cole nervously shook Jacob’s hand. The scar slicing through the man’s face was shocking and unexpected. “Yes. Um, Daniel. Yes. Daniel. That’s me.”

“Nice to meet you,” Jacob said.

Dr. Cole suddenly felt overwhelmed with guilt and what he could only describe as a sense of unworthiness. He looked Jacob up and down, studying his face and body. The tight-fitting jacket Jacob wore showed off the impressive physique displayed in his SAM pictures.

“Are you okay?” Jacob asked.

Dr. Cole nodded and forced a smile to appear on his face. He said, “You’re, um, rather intimidating.”

Jacob laughed and placed his hand on Dr. Cole’s knee, causing the doctor to flinch. He said, “It’s the scar.”

“How’d you get it?”

“Long story. But it’s also why I don’t do face pics on the SAM app. I’m a bit too recognizable, you know?”

“Sure.” Dr. Cole pried his gaze from Jacob’s handsome, chiseled face and looked down at his hand still resting on the doctor’s knee. Dr. Cole wiggled sideways, tugging his leg away. “I’m sorry, Taylor, this is all just very new to me.”

“It’s okay. I understand. I see this all the time.”

“Really?” Dr. Cole chuckled and shook his head. “I doubt you see guys like me all the time.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Look at me. Look at you.” Dr. Cole leaned back a bit, folded his arms, and turned his gaze to the windows overlooking 10th Avenue. “You’re young. Fit. Handsome. I’m just an old, overweight, gray-haired man.”

“Then why’d you reach out to me?”

“Excuse me?” Dr. Cole looked up into Jacob’s deep brown eyes, trying not to notice the perfect white teeth filling his crooked smile. “All I did was send you a wave.”

“Because you found me attractive, right? Either my picture or my profile. Something caught your eye.”

Dr. Cole reminded himself of his intent to approach this meeting like a therapy session. Jacob not only looked good but smelled good. He needed to focus and not let the attraction he felt distract him. Dr. Cole scratched at his beard and asked, “Why did you respond? There’s very little on my profile. What made you interested in–”

“I respond to everyone. I’m a nice guy.”

“Oh.” Dr. Cole lowered his head and looked down at his feet. The wind cut across his nose, causing him to sniff repeatedly. “Well, now that you’ve seen me, I’m sure you’re not interested.”

“Nonsense.” Jacob slid closer to Dr. Cole until their knees were touching. “This isn’t about age or fitness, Daniel. You came looking for something. An experience. Right?”

“I . . . I suppose.”

“Besides, attraction is all in the mind.” Jacob leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He stared at the traffic on the street below. “I like what I do. And I’m very good at what I do.”

“It’s . . . it’s just that I’ve never done anything like this,” Dr. Cole said. The guilt that had washed over him earlier came flooding back with a vengeance. “I’m . . . I’m married. I’ve never cheated on my wife. Not once. I . . . I love her.”

“This isn’t about love, either. This is about exploration.” Jacob put his arm around the doctor’s shoulder and pulled him closer. He whispered in his ear, “Relax. You can trust me.”

Dr. Cole smiled. Jacob’s firm grip felt calming and reassuring. He surprisingly felt very safe. He asked, “So, I, uh, don’t know where we go from here.”

“You like what you see?”

“Yes.”

“And you liked what you read in my profile?”

Dr. Cole nodded.

“Good. We can work out the details later, including my fee. Like I said, today was just to meet. Unless you have more time to spend with me. We can find a hotel, or–”

“No. I, uh, I’m supposed to be getting groceries. Butter.”

“Butter can be fun.” Jacob winked and smiled.

Dr. Cole looked away, feeling both embarrassed and excited.

“You know how to reach me,” Jacob said.

“Sure. But, Taylor, I . . . I may cancel. I’m still not sure–”

Jacob pulled the doctor even closer. He said, “It’s okay if you do. It’s common to have second thoughts. To have doubt. I understand completely. This is all about you, Daniel. I’m here for you. I won’t be offended if you cancel.”

“Thanks.” Dr. Cole closed his eyes and allowed himself to enjoy the warm embrace of this young, beautiful man. He looked up into Jacob’s eyes and said, “I’m glad we met, Taylor.”

The wind whipped through the sunken bleachers, blowing leaves and random bits of trash up into the air.