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above went in and out of focus. Hospital, yes, he was in the hospital. He opened his eyes as nothing more came back to him.

Although Martin didn’t know many people in Fairfield, he had when he attended the City School as his mother had before him. After attending university, he’d met his wife, Caroline, and they’d settled in Enfield. A sharp pain gripped his chest as he now feared he would never see his wife again. They’d had a few difficult years but had come out the other side stronger. Now they were so close, and she’d become his soulmate – yes, that old cliché, but she was. Raising his index finger, he wiped away a tear that had trickled from his right eye.

He did know Jason’s ex-wife, Lisa Apsley, and probably too well, he thought. She lived a couple of miles away, so perhaps his next stop would be her house. Although after this morning’s events he doubted there was much hope of her actually living there and, if she did, he wondered what sort of reception he’d get. Pointless to attempt to find Jason as, since splitting up with Lisa, he had no idea where he was living.

As he expected, Homebrook Avenue was all wrong. Just like every other road in this weird and wacky world he seemed to have landed in. The house was there as he remembered it. However, on the driveway were two old-style cars which Martin believed wouldn’t belong to Lisa.

He rang the doorbell of number twenty-two and stood back, waiting for a reply. After pushing the bell for a second time, a slim, attractive, thirty-something woman with long auburn hair and striking green eyes opened the door and smiled at him. Martin presumed she must be on her way out, or her house was freezing, as she stood at the door wearing a camel-coloured coat.

“Hello, can I help you?” she asked.

“Does Lisa live here?” he mumbled. Clearly not, as the answer was staring him in the face.

“No, sorry. This house belongs to Jason Apsley. I’m Jenny, his wife.”

“Sorry, Jason, who?”

“Apsley, this is the home of Mr and Mrs Apsley. Are you alright? You look a little peaky if you don’t mind me saying so.”

“I know Jason! Is he in? I know him! We work together … we work at Waddington’s Steel,” he blurted. Now feeling hopeful as the energy pumped back into him as if he’d just received an adrenaline shot.

“Oh, how odd. Very odd. Yes, he’s in the garden. Could you hang on a moment, and I’ll go and get him.”

Now she was the one looking confused as she closed the door. Jason was here? Was it him? This was his old house, but who was the green-eyed woman? He wasn’t married – he’d only just got divorced.

The door swung open, and there in front of Martin was his boss. Okay, with a beard and longer hair, but yes, this was him, Jason Twat Apsley. Well, that’s what the staff called him behind his back – he wore that gormless look he often had – which many of the office staff would imitate when he wasn’t looking.

“Oh, God, Jason, it’s you! What’s going on? The world’s gone fucking mad. I thought I’d lost my fucking marbles, but thank God you’re here. Who the fuck was that woman who answered the door, and where the fuck is Lisa? Anyway, what you doing here?”

“Martin, is that you?”

“Yes, of course it fucking well is. Who do you think I fucking am? It’s me, Martin! Jason, what the fucking hell is going on? Where is everyone else? And why has every fucking nutter I’ve met today told me it’s 19 fucking 77?”

“Oh, bollocks!”

4

Scotty, Beam Us Up.

“Jason, I don’t understand what the hell is going on, and who the bloody hell is he?” Jenny stood in the kitchen doorway with her hands on her hips.

Martin had blurted out my previous life’s history in the future 2019, as he stood on the doorstep whilst I sported my well-versed gormless expression. Jenny had stood in the hallway, copying me. Leaving Jenny transfixed, I’d ferried Martin into the lounge and shovelled him onto the sofa. I’d told him to sit quietly, and I would be back in a minute – delivered as if instructing one of my pupils. Fortunately, after his outburst he complied and was now nestled on our sofa, staring into space. I’d returned to the hallway gripping the lounge door handle as if barring the way through, thus protecting my family from some highly contaminated object shaped to look like one of my old work colleagues.

“Jen, I know this is a bit odd, but I used to work with Martin some years ago. I think he’s a little confused, and I’m not sure what he’s doing here. I’ll sort it, don’t worry.”

‘You’re screwed, Apsley!’

That ever so annoying voice in my head taunted me. It had been waiting months for an opportunity, and now it had it. Escaped from its cranial cage, it now scurried around my brain causing havoc.

“Don’t worry … what do you mean, don’t worry! The bloke is a total nutter, and he’s sitting in our lounge right now!” screamed Jenny. She rarely became animated, but now her kryptonite eyes burned green as her hands flailed everywhere, which almost simultaneously stopped as she planted one on the wall and the other on the stair bannister. As far as she was concerned, I’d just let some nutter in the house and her worry was for the children.

“Look, can you sort the kids out? I’ll deal with this. Please, Jen, let me deal with it.”

“Jason, you better. I’m not happy that we’ve some weirdo in the house who thinks he’s been teleported into this world like Captain Kirk from Star Trek! I can't wait to hear what he comes out with next! Probably ‘Scotty, beam us up,’ and we’ll watch him disappear in front of our eyes! I can’t believe you’re not as shocked

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