American library books » Other » Not Even Close (A New Generation) by Elizabeth Reyes (sight word books .txt) 📕

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him.

He chuckled humorlessly, lifting, anddropping a shoulder. “You can imagine what that does to a boy at that age. Iwas completely hooked. I thought I was in love.” For the first time since hestarted talking about Lizzette, the pained expression morphed into a smirk. “Eventhough I fumbled my way through it each time we had sex. I had no idea what Iwas doing and at fifteen none of my friends did either.” The smirk withered suddenly,and he glanced away. “Then three months later she and her dad were killed when adrunk driver hit them head on. I was devastated. In those past three monthsbefore her death, she was all I could think of and suddenly she was just gone. Myworld changed like that.” He snapped his finger. “I was just a kid and thoughtmy life was over. Thankfully, my mom was there and got me through it. Itwas then that I first learned that forgetting was the best cure to anyheartache.”

Finally feeling like she should say something, Vannah said whatshe’d been stuck on since he’d said it. “Sounds to me like she was your firstand only love. You said you thought you were in love. Weren’t you?”

With a weak tilt of his head, he smiled pensively before lookinginto her eyes again. “I was fifteen, Savannah. What did I know about love? Ikissed her on a dare at fourteen, but it wasn’t until almost a year later that sheinvited me to hang out with her while she babysat her sisters that wemade out for the first time. Not to take anything from her, she was a sweetgirl, cute as fuck and she laughed a lot, like you.” He smiled pecking her. “Whatmade her laugh? I couldn’t tell you. I knew little about her. We hardly talked.I know now my fifteen-year-old ass was in love with what kissing and touchingher did to my inexperienced heart. Up until last year I really considered herthe love of my life. Ironically, if you’d asked me a few weeks ago, I might’ve insistedI was in love with her. But I now know that while I’m sure I did love her tosome extent, even as little as I knew about love then, that wasn’t real love—truelove. I can admit now that aside from us sharing something as unforgettable as beingeach other’s first everything, it wasn’t true love. There was little substance,other than both of us being so bewildered by the novelty of it all.”

“Why?” Vannah shook her head not understanding. This sounded liketextbook first love to her. “Why do you say that?”

“Because.” He cradled her face in his big hands gazing deep intoher eyes. “As much as it will forever be a beautiful memory, I’ve lived longenough to know I loved her as much as a fifteen-year-old thought he knew aboutlove. But my grown ass knows better now. My mom was the one who opened my eyesto this just last year. After getting tired of watching me push through onemeaningless connection after another, she finally took me aside and gave me a goodtalking to. I realized how wrong I’d been for years.”

Staring into her eyes like he had so many times, Byron shook hishead looking more anxious than Vannah had ever seen him before. Even when he’dbeen faced with her dad and uncles.

“After only two months of being with you, there are somany reasons, I know I’m so insanely in love with you, Savannah.”Vannah nearly gasped as he gazed into her eyes. For a moment she thought shemight swoon and then he went on. “I love you, baby. Lizette may’ve been myfirst everything, but for the life of me I can’t remember much more about ourconnection. I can’t even recall a single deep conversation we had. Not like now,when I lie awake at night thinking of everything we spoke of that day. I’venever smiled and laughed so much as I have since I met you.” Savannah’s browspinched instantly as she felt her throat swell. “Losing someone I was so closeto and hung out with almost on the daily, so suddenly and tragically was, andwill forever be, a pivotal part of my past. But as far as real love is concerned,I know better now that I’ve experienced it as an adult. There’s so much more towhy I’ve fallen for you. As pissed as I was that night at Frat Row about youthinking I was taking advantage of your friend, I look back now and know evenif I didn’t know it then, I was instantly brought to my knees when your tinyass came at me like a bat out of hell to rescue her.”

Vannah’s hands were at her mouth now holding back her emotions ashe smiled and went on.

“Grumpy ass people like myself, have never liked, nor enjoyedgiddy people like you. Yet, I’ve never gotten enough of seeing your smile and hearingyour laugh since that first day. As much as I cringe at the thought of havingto be around him, I love that you think your scary-as-fuck dad is a teddybear.” He laughed shaking his head even as her lips began to quiver. “Ilove how much affection you have for that evil sister of yours, and you two squealand hug each other like you haven’t seen each other in years, even if it’s beenjust weeks.” He slowed when he saw how emotional this was all making her. “Ilove that you buy books on OfferUp to save your family money. Seriously, haveyou not seen how big that restaurant, slash multi banquet hall is? And that’sjust one of their restaurants!”

She nudged him smirking even through her tears. “That stilldoesn’t make me entitled to any of it.”

“And I fucking love that about you, too.” He kissed herthen squeezed her with another grunt then turned to the food she’d begun toprepare for him on the counter. “I love that I already know, you can warm atortilla for me, and it’ll be the best one I’ve ever tasted not just becauseyou made it for me, but because you were smiling and laughing the whole

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