Less than Perfect by S. J. Evans (love letters to the dead txt) 📕

, she heard him say in her mind. “Skye.” he added slyly.
The line cut off and she dropped the phone with exhaustion. Please don’t bring it, Johnny, please. I’m not ready to see him again.

Closing her eyes, she let her mind drift off to the only thing comforting: Jules’ wonderful self. She saw everything about him and everything that she liked about him.
Spinning her out of the train of pictures, Johnny entered the room, carrying a tray of food and a bottle of pain medication. He hadn’t even bothered to knock. “Here you go, Princess.” He said as he set the tray before her.
Her mind screamed in agony. He always has called her Princess, but it’s usually right before he touches her. “Thanks.” She tried to sit up but pain seared through her chest and arms and she fell back against the mattress, cringing. She fought the pain and tried to manage on her own but Johnny ended up helping her up.
He slipped his hand behind her back and pushed her up, Skye wishing that she could push him away. “Be careful, Skylar, you have to take it easy.”
“Like you’ve always done to me,” she mumbled quietly, hoping that he couldn’t hear her. He was too close though, and he reacted to her words, his expression dropping into a pained expression.
“What was that, Princess?” He asked roughly.
She jumped in surprise, her body tensing up. “Nothing, I mean, I was just saying that the food looks good.” She lied, slapping herself mentally for even saying anything.
“That’s what I thought,” he whispered, breathing right in front of her, his warm breath sending chills down Skye’s arms.
She waited for him to leave, hoping that he wouldn’t touch her and break the pact. He did eventually, and she sighed deeply, relieved that he was gone. She quickly tossed the medication in her mouth and gulped it down, cringing at the taste. She carefully plucked at the food even though she hardly had an appetite and realized just how long it had been since she last had

food.
With her thirst and hunger fulfilled enough, she shoved the food away and lie back down, snuggling against the comfort. She didn’t let any pain bother her in that moment; she was going to be immune to it sooner or later. Physical pain had lashed out at her so many times that it was almost a part of her life; but the emotional pain buried deep inside her kept her from lashing out at herself. She couldn’t fight with what little strength she had because of the deep mourning she felt.
Her mind flashed to the picture of her dad she had found, the picture she was sure her mom had gone to trouble to hide. She breathed deeply as she pictured Leah and him holding hands when they were twenty. She had always found it strange that the only picture she had found of them was when they were so much younger and she also found it strange that her mom looked so young for the age she claimed to be.
Skye wasn’t sure what to make of it, but she knew that she would find out eventually. All secrets come out in time. She found a piece of paper on her bedside table and picked up a pen, scribbling words that she wished she could say.
Mom, why can’t you see what’s happening around you? I wish you could come to realize everything, but who ever could tell you? You may be the reason I am in this mess of a life, but without you, there definitely wouldn’t be a reason for my life.

Tears stung her eyes and she tucked the paper away in her drawer, closing her eyes and rolling over. Burying her head in the pillow, sobs broke out silently and she fell asleep like that, crying bitterly and quietly.

Skye awoke to the sound of a thud inside her bedroom. She blinked her eyes open and peered around the dark room. Seeing nothing but darkness, she relaxed herself and lay back down.
The sound came again and she realized that it wasn’t coming from in her room after all but from outside. It wasn’t a thudding sound as much as it was the sound of rocks tapping against the outer wall.
Filled with curiosity and drowsiness, she got out of bed and walked over to the window. On the ground below was Bryan, throwing stones against the house to get her attention. He smiled and gave a nod, indicating for her to open the window.
She leaned out of the window and glanced around. “What are you doing here, Bryan?” She called down to him, her voice slurred and quiet.
He grinned, “I want to be with you, Skye, and I couldn’t sleep without working things out.”
“You could have woken up Johnny or my mom, Bryan. Be quiet, I’ll be right down.” Disregarding her mom’s instructions to never let Bryan in the house late at night without parental oversee, she slipped out of her room and downstairs.
Unlocking the door, she opened it and smiled weakly at Bryan.
Bryan smiled back and tucked his hands in his pockets. “Hey, babe.”
“Hi, now be quiet.”
“If I’m being quiet than how am I supposed to work things out?”
She sighed in irritation and laughed sheepishly. “Come with me,” she said, grabbing his wrist and leading him downstairs. She closed the door and leaned up against it, biting her lip nervously. “What do you want to work out? I thought that we already worked everything out about Jules and what happened at Buxton’s.”
“I know, but I just wanted to apologize again. I’m really not proud of what I did back at Buxton’s or last night, and even though you say that you forgive me, I want to ask again. Will you forgive me, Skye?”
“I forgive you, Bryan. You know that I always forgive you, you didn’t have to come over so late.”
“I know, but I told you, I couldn’t sleep. Babe,” he neared her and caressed her cheek, “you’re always on my mind and always,” he took her hand with his free one and laced their fingers together. Pressing their hands over his heart he added, “Right here.”
“Bryan, if that’s true, then how could you feel that hitting me doesn’t affect anything? It does.” She asked him, her crystal and sleepy eyes begging for an answer.
He pulled their heads right next to each other and pressed their foreheads together. “I know it does, and I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you. I know that you hate it and I know that it’s not right, I’m going to be better though, I promise.” He said the words so calmly, so perfectly, that she couldn’t help but believe them. Believing him was never an easy thing to do but she wanted to be able to. Bryan wrapped her into a hug and sighed. “I love you,” he let the three words hang in the air, and no one could snatch them up or take them away. They sounded sincere and delicate, something love should sound more like.
“I love you too.” She sighed, and this time she put her hands through his tousled hair and locked her lips with his. He lifted herself in his arms and carried her from underneath, not allowing her legs to fall as he carried her forward a little bit.
They kissed passionately for a moment before he broke apart the kissing, catching his breath. “Wait, I thought you wanted to take things slow?” He breathed, pulling his head away from her.
She shook her head and chuckled, brushing her lips against his again. “I do, but I just need something for the moment, okay? Just shut up for now.” She laced her fingers through his hair and kissed him again. He instantly carried them over to the wall, Skye’s back pressing against the cold stone wall as her tank slightly lifted up.
He was definitely enjoying himself as they kissed and carried themselves in something they hadn’t put themselves in before; but Skye was only trying to feel something, she didn’t want to let him slip away and leave yet and she needed something far away from Johnny. She needed to feel something

.
Bryan had other things in mind though and he hadn’t changed as much as Skye wanted him to. He fingered her shirt and traced his fingers up her back, chills fluttering inside of her stomach. Clumsily, he brought her over to one of the worn out couches and tossed her down on it, an expression of desire striking his features.
She suddenly came to the realization of what he really wanted from her. “Wait!” She cried out, propping herself up on her elbows. “We can’t take things too far! Bryan—” She lost her breath when he dropped himself on top of her and chuckled.
He grinned wickedly and pushed her arms down, his breath ragged. “You said you needed something, and this is me giving you something.” He told her around a kiss, his hands traveling under her top and lifting it.
She fought his hands as they pinned hers down and moaned against his lips. Her mind was clouded with fear and she was starting to lose all the air in her lungs. Struggling in his grip, she cried out in all furry she had, “Bryan, stop!”
“You had your chance, babe, now you’re mine

.” He perched himself up and yanked his top off. Bending back down, he stared into her eyes as he panted. Tears poured out of her eyes and washed down her cheeks as he watched her, his hot breath tingling her skin. She couldn’t believe that he was getting to her and not following through with what he had told her earlier.
There was a cross hanging down from his neck and as Skye saw it she remembered back to the day when he had first asked her to go out with him. She wished that everything could have been as it had been back then, simple. She cried out and pleaded with him to stop, but the more she cried the more he kissed and brushed his fingers over her. She got an arm free and slapped him as hard as she could but her strength was disappearing and she was falling in his ploy, her heart hammering and her mind drifting.
Taken aback, Bryan growled and slapped her hard across her cheek, anger coursing through his veins. He brought a hand to her neck and lowered his lips to her ear. “Listen now, angel. I better not see you around Jules, and I better not see you around that coffee shop again, understood? I love you baby, but no one else gets to have you, you’re mine

.”
Fear took a painful hold on her mind and she let go of his arms, waiting for the beating he would give. She couldn’t stop crying,