Playing Miss Innocent by Amicia Bianchi (beautiful books to read TXT) 📕

"My appetite has left me as fast as I fled the servant, my fatigue is what has come to the forefront, therefore I think it would be best if I retired for the night," I spoke obnoxiously. I needed to get myself together, he was an interesting person, just as I had imagined so it would be hard to keep from doing what I wanted, which would involve showing my real side. He smirked at me but put his hand out to take mine.

"Then I'll have to show you to your quarters," he mused. I reached out to his proffered hand tentatively as if it just the mere contact would give me away. “We wouldn’t want you to have another foul encounter with that servant again now would we?” he mused. I stifled a giggle, yes he was an interesting man and he would test my resolve, I just knew however I was determined to pass his tests. Let the games begin…

 I stared at the ceiling for several moments after I woke first trying to remember where I was then soaking in the fact that I was finally here. For so long I had dreamed of being here. I could still remember the first time I’d gotten a chance to see him. I was only a child at the time but my impression of him had never faded.

I’d heard many rumors about his exploits over the years so I was aware of his reputation as a rake. I’d even heard that his reputation was the reason he was still unattached. But somehow the image I’d first gotten stayed on my mind and I still had a tiny hope that one day I could be his bride.

Although there’d been many things said about him, he was respected and revered by the people of his land. I didn’t see why those noble misses hadn’t snatched him up if he was truly all that everyone said he was. There seemed to be no downside as he was a good man who cared about his people and the rumors pegged him as never one to leave a woman unsatisfied. The ton had to know of such rumors, they talked just as much as the snickering maids that I’d overhear in whispered conversations about him. I see nothing wrong with an experienced husband and the duke seems like a very interesting person. I don’t think I’ll be bored trying to explore the truth to the rumors. I found myself giggling like the gossiping maids just as there was a knock on my door pulling me from my thoughts. I rose from the bed and opened the door to see a plump rosy cheeked woman with pasty skin and brunette hair.

“Good morning, my lady. I am Mary and I am to be your personal maid but I am also the head maid,” she announced.

I smiled at her as a bath was brought in and quickly prepared for me. I attempted light conversation as I wasn’t accustomed to having a lady’s maid in the room during my baths.

Normally I was left alone but the room became busy as more maids came in. Once I’d gotten out they’d immediately started fussing over me. I was a bit nervous about these kinds of things because as the oldest of seven children I’d gotten used to doing most things for myself.

There had been one handmaid between all of the children so as my siblings increased they required more of her attention and as I got older it was expected of me to do for myself. As I was not nobility no one had time to pamper me nor did I get the luxury of having immature tantrums.

My father had been a merchant who’d gotten wealthy and decided to run a farm. I had not been born into a pampered life like that of those debutantes in the London ballrooms that’d been indoctrinated only in the ways to capture a man.

I had grown up with a mother who stood by her husband and was not afraid of hard work. I’d quickly found that the values I’d learned as a child had been unless among those bratty society misses and their scheming mamas who were auctioning off their daughters to the highest bidder like cattle.

I hadn’t found very many that I could trust were genuine and an even smaller few I considered friends. The men apparently had no need for a woman with values they were just looking for the pretty, thin, and docile but not necessarily one with substance or too much character.

It was a slippery slope and one had to know how to conduct one’s self just so she attracted the right type of fellow. One had to simply know which suitors were potentially abusive, considered to be scoundrels, or almost broke because of gambling troubles.

Among the eligible gentlemen circulating balls and soirees seeking a wife were men ranging from those fresh from the schoolhouses to ones at least my father’s age if not older. All of which seemed to jump on the 'next best thing' when one of the ladies became available or unavailable.

I never cared to be part of it and I don’t miss having to go to all of the events only to be judged by both the men as well as the other women since that decided your success or failure. Their way of pegging someone a failure as a woman went against my upbringing of valuing oneself and others.

If it hadn’t been for my father being given a title I wouldn’t have had to go and put up with it but then I wouldn’t have gotten this opportunity either. My father hadn’t been of a mind to push any of us to marry until he received the title of baron and felt the need to fit in with the customs of the titled nobles.

According to the ton an unmarried woman of one and twenty, like me, is an old spinster which isn’t the best thing to have for a man trying to fit in. For the sake of my family being able to assimilate properly and peacefully mix into society it was important that I found a husband and had a successful marriage.

As I was the oldest daughter and the only one in danger of spinsterhood it was up to me to help my sisters, especially the twins, Vivian and Rosabel, who would have their debut next summer. With this in mind my father thought to arrange a marriage for me. Knowing all of this, I’ve said nothing and watched to see who I’d have to marry. As the oldest I’ve been there as all of my siblings have grown up and if nothing I want them to be happy. They shouldn’t have to be stuck in a life of misery because of these nobles’ judgmental ways and prejudice rules.

None of us asked for our father to be given a title or to be thrust into high society with these nobles where we have to learn and adapt to their rules that they’ve grown up knowing.

For me it has been trial and error, I had to find my own form of happiness in this but for them they have time to prepare themselves. I'm sure it will prove easier for the younger ones to transition if we can have successful matches but that has to start with me that way hopefully not even the twins will have a rough time, as I did.

I knew what would be required of me long before my parents said anything. The only thing I didn’t know was the particular gentleman they had in mind. They hadn’t told me much about what deal they were making with the duke instead they’d focused on trying to convey to me how important this was and how much my marriage meant to our family. How I needed to learn to become a proper lady of society by immersing myself in it and be ready to help my sisters get good matches.

I’d resigned myself to my fate, so I’d had no high hopes, before I found out that I’d be marrying the duke of Kensington. These are the types of things I've dreamed of since childhood but I could never have known that I'd really get here. I thought this over as Mary and the others prepared me and I obediently followed their direction until I stood before a mirror to observe myself for the last time before I became a married woman, more specifically the duchess of Kensington.

I wondered how I’d be as mistress of this house but it was too late now to worry about such things because soon I’ll be the duchess and I’d just have to figure it out.

I examined the girl in the mirror looking first at her white slippers peaked out from under her skirts that fanned out around her then the lace and jewels carefully embroidered into the white dress that had been made just for her.

It was beautiful dress that fit snuggly to every curve of her figure and the pure white of the dress provided a healthy contrast with her creamy skin. Her wavy blonde hair had been arranged in a curly up-do yet a few strands had broken free to frame her face that looked a bit different from the girl I’d gotten used to seeing lately. I reached a gloved hand out to touch the image of the girl in mirror.

As I searched her green irises I saw her fear and reluctance, she had no confidence. The girl staring back at me had an unsure future and she wasn’t ready. I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath gathering my wayward emotions and exhaled steeling my resolve. When I looked back in the mirror I saw Classandra Hoffing the eldest daughter of the Baron of Chanti and the woman who was to be the duchess of Kensington. Just then Mary came back into the room.

“You look beautiful, my lady,” she said smiling at me.

“Thank you, Mary,” I offered her a brief smile in return before lowering my head for her to put on my veil.

Once she was done I was led to the place Gabriel and I were to be wed. I only caught a glimpse of the church for a moment before I was ushered in. Inside his grace stood waiting and I accepted his proffered arm as we proceeded further.

Gabriel was dressed handsomely but of course he was an attractive man and the fit of his clothes was very appealing to the eyes. By looks alone I didn’t see why anyone wouldn’t want him for a husband and it couldn’t hurt that he was a wealthy duke too.

From what I could tell he was a good person, there should be no reason for a woman not to thank her fate that she could be the bride of such a person. There are unfortunate women who have been married to despicable men dozens of years older than them who have possibly cursed their fates. In comparison I am truly glad I’m not one of them but before all of this I hadn’t wanted to be