Sinfully Yours by Mirah Selim (best e reader for manga txt) 📕

Author Pov

Hazel strolled around the room sighing in sadness. Cyrus hasn't been behaving like he used to for the past two days. Even though he was asking her now and then about her health and if she had eaten or not. But something about his gaze whenever he looks at her stomach saddens her.

Why does he look like he wasn't happy? Or there is something else that's bothering him. Finally mustering her strength she decided to talk it out with him. He can't just behave like he was fine with everything when his eyes tell another story.

Taking a deep breath she walked to his office but to her surprise, he wasn't there. Her eyes roamed around the house as she tried to find him and eventually she did. He was in the poolside sitting on the edge of the pool with his feet submerged in the water of the pool.

She walked near him only to find him looking lost in his thoughts staring at the water in front of him. She slowly took a seat beside him letting her legs fall in the cold water. The water that reached only his ankle made her legs slightly below her knees fell in it. He indeed is a giant or maybe she's just too small compared to him.

She turned her head to him placing her hand over his thigh making him blink his eyes turning his attention to her. "Sweetheart." He mumbled making her smile at him.

"Cyrus, what's wrong? Tell me what's bothering you?" She questioned staring into his eyes. He gulped shaking his head.

"Nothing. I am fine." But she sighed not buying his words.

"You can tell me if you don't want this child." This made him snap his head to her in shock. He instantly shook his head.

"Love, how can you even think that? Of course, I want this child. I love you and my child too." She sighed staring at him with a sad gaze.

"Then what's wrong? You look bothered to me from the time I told you about my pregnancy." Cyrus finally decided to reveal his fear to her.

"I am not sad Hazel. I am scared." His eyes diverted to the water of the pool as he continued.

"I am scared of letting my child face the same fate as me. I am afraid of what if our child has to go through the same suffering I was forced into." Finally realizing his pain she scooted closer to him grabbing his hand in her both hands. She comforted him with her touch letting him continue.

"If we had a boy, being the eldest son of a mafia boss he will become the heir automatically and even if he wouldn't want to I will have to force him to get the merciless training. That's fucking traumatizing shit!" He mumbled gritting his teeth remembering all the torture he went through just in the name of training. His heart was forced to turn into a stone that people's tears and begging never affected him until he felt this stone melting after meeting Hazel.

"And if we had a girl. Her fate will be worst. Being a daughter of a mob boss she has to stay homeschooled. She will stay locked in this house for her safety and in the end, she will have to be used as a tool to strengthen the power of our gang by betrothing her to some other mafia man to create an alliance." Hazel's heart dropped hearing his words. Tears filled her eyes as she thought about the future of her children.

"But you're a boss, right? You can save them from this world." Cyrus chuckled at her naive words. He turned his face to her shaking his head.

"No matter how strong I am. My men and the people attached to me will only respect me if I follow the rules that have been made decades ago. A Mafia boss needs to choose the next boss for his gang and only that person will be respected. This means after the birth of our son or daughter their fates will be sealed. I am the powerful man of this country that people fear but there are several other countries a mafia boss needs to make alliances with. And daughters or sisters are considered tools for that in our world. And most of the bosses of gangs keep mistresses after marriage." Hazel's eyes shed tears as her other hand held her stomach in fear.

Cyrus noticed her actions and he knew his fear got transferred to her as well. He sighed wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her against his chest. She placed her head against his shoulder making him kiss her forehead.

"Don't cry, my love. I promised to protect you and I promise you that I wouldn't let my children suffer because their father is a Mafia boss." She looked up making him gently wipe her cheeks using his thumb.

"I wasn't a good person but I wouldn't let my children become like me. I want them to have a better life. I promise I will make everything alright." She nodded her head snuggling her face in his chest.

"I trust you, Cyrus. I know you can do anything for us." He smiled kissing her head.

They both stayed in the same spot for a longer time letting a peaceful silence engulf them. Cyrus finally made up his mind and he knew what he has to do. He has gone through hell and had faced death approaching him several times because of that traumatic training. He might have lived through them but he knew his mind and heart died at that time. If it wasn't for Hazel entering his life he wouldn't have ever felt his heart again.

"Boss are you sure?" Creed questioned looking at Cyrus who hummed in response looking through the file.

"Have I ever asked you to do something I am not sure about?" Creed looked down feeling bothered by his decision.

"Our gang is known as the most feared one not only in this country but several too. We were able to build many alliances because other gang leaders trusted in your abilities boss. We don't get attacked anymore because other gangs are scared of you. This unmatched strength and power of our gang are because of you boss. Our men will not easily accept a new boss." Creed said looking at Cyrus who sighed placing the file back on the table.

Yes, Cyrus was stepping back from the position of a mob boss as he was ready to sacrifice anything but wouldn't let any harm come near his woman and his children. His childhood was fucked up. Most of his life was spent swimming in the blood of others without feeling remorse and he didn't want his children to become like him.