Falling For Him? by Katie Brooks (ready to read books txt) 📕

that painful thoughts that seemed to be everywhere.


The next time I woke up, the clock next to the bed read 4:26pm. I got up and got in the shower and when I was finished with that I foung my bag of clothes by the door of the bathroom.

I changed and crawled back into bed and turned on the T.V.. Halfway through the show I got up and got some aspirin to help my poounding head from all that I drank last night. I felt my heart bounding and it seemed to hurt more then the headache I had. I just wanted to dissappear, to not be real, for this all to be a bad dream.

Without even knowing it, I had starte to cry... Tears rolled down my face, my neck and soaked into my t-shirt. I didn't try and stop it, to hold back any of my pain or tears. I let it all out, I didn't care or even think twice about it.

Time seemed to pass slowly, painfully and it was all the same. I was hungery but I didn't want to eat, my arms were stif from not moving but I couldn't move a muscle, my face was wet with tears but I didn't wipe them away. I stared at nothing, feeling everything and soon it just became a numbing pain that I could feel everywhere but making sure that I felt nothing else.

I didn't see Kyle that day whole day but I could hear him down stairs, moving around trying to be quite.

I faded in and out... not really awear of the things around me. Finally, I got up and stared out the window, watching the wind blow the trees around, blowing the leaves off and onto the ground.

I opened the window and let the brese blow over my arms and legs. I looked around and found my bag at the end of the bed. I changed into my black skinny jeans and gray and neon yellow shirt. I looked into the mirror and almost cried when I saw my face. My dirty blonde hair was flat and lifeless and my brown green eyes had no pop to them like they almost always did.

I grabbed my make up bag out of my bag and put on mascara first then put on eyeliner on my lower and upper eyes and to make the final touches I added some gray eyeshadow to match my shirt. I brushed my teeth and then put on a little bit of lip gloss.

I fixed my hair and made it a little more poofy! Now when I looked into the mirror, I looked a little more alive. I almost cried as I thought about what I was about to do.

I took a picture of myself and saved it. Then, I walked over to Kyle's clothset were I knew he put his backpack when he wasn't using it. I grabbed a piece of papper and a pencil from his bag and wrote:


Kyle,

I'm sorry I'm doing this to you. I will talk to you soon to let you know that I'm okay. It's not yuor fault, you were nothing but amazing! I love you with all my heart and no one will ever be able to take your place!

What I've been keeping from you is that a few nights ago, I was at a party with Jacob and we were just hanging out but it turned into more... we did that! I didn't tell anyone because I hated that I cheated on Taylor, but now that this has happened, I think it's better if i just leave for a while. Get things staightened out.

I'll called you when I get where I'm headed. Please don't worry about me.

Love you so much,
Sydney

I folded the note and laid it down on the bed. i picked up my bag and turned on the shower then went out the window and ran as fast as I can to my house two blocks away, knowing that with the shower on he won't cheek on me for a while but he will soon and I'm going to need to be on my way by then.

I slipped into my house with tears running down my face. I hated this. All of it.

I made a whole suitcase full of clothes and walked down the stairs grabbed my keys to the car and some extra cash that I knew my dad has. Then I went into the office and grabbed my money, I saved it since begining of high school. Four years, and I finally had four thousand six hunderade dollars.

I ran out and got in the blue bug. The car that I had wanted since I was ten years old. Now it looked like the only thing that I wanted to stay away from. It was only way out, it was my only way out, I have to go! I kept telling myself.

I drove until I saw a sign that said welcome to New York! by then I was to tired to drive any farther, if I did I would probably fall asleep at the wheel and end up where I started at home but in the hospital this time.

I pulled up to a hotel on the edges of New York and smiled to myself. Everytime that I had ever tried to leave, I could never do it. But I finally did it.

I walked up to the front doors and walked into a cool lobby. An older lady with hair going from gray to white looked up and smiled over the desk she was sitting at to look at me.

"Hi, there. How are you?" she said, her voice coming out hard and raspy making her seem older then she looked.

"Hi, I'm fine. Um... I need a room but I don't really know how long I'm going to be here. Either a night or a few days..."

"Don't worry about it, hun! No biggy to me. Your not putting me out none. Now come on over here and let me just put your name down and you can pay for tongiht and tomorrow morning you can disside what your going to do then. That okay with you?"

"Yes, thats fine with me."

Shortly after that she gave me the key to my room and I went out and grabbed my bag and walked over to the elovator, going up to floor three. I slipped my key into the door but it didn't work, I tried it again and the same thing, as I was about to try it again the door opened.

I gasped and stepped back, almost falling over my bag as I did. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you!" gasped the most beautiful boy I have ever seen! He had shinning blue eyes that looked amazing with his black straight scene hair. His skin, it wasn't pasty white but it wasn't tan or anything. But everything about him was just... gorgeous!

"I'm sorry! I think I have the wrong key or something! I didn't know that this was your room!"

"It's okay! Really. It happens all the time. Ms.Duddings down in the lobby always gets mixed up with the numbers. It says 315 but it really opens the door on across the way, 316." He smiled as he explained, Oh, god even his smile is amazing!

"Thanks! Wow, you don't know how greatful I am that you told me that! I would have freaked! I've had the wrost few days. Anyway! Thanks again." I smiled before I turned and open my door, the right one this time, but before I walked in he said, "Hey, I'm James by the way! Now that we're neghbors and stuff just thought you should know. And if you ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask."

"Thanks! I'm Sydney. It was nice to met you, James." I put my bag in the room and turned around and shook his hand before going in side.

I walked into my room and closed the door after me.

But as soon as the door closed and the silents creped up on me... I finally broke! Falling to the floor I cried my eyes out.

Everything was wrong! I knew that I shouldn't have gone to that party and just went to hang with Kyle. I knew that I shouldn't have walked out and drank so much. I knew that I shouldn't have left and taken the money and car and leave nothing behind. I knew that it was wrong and that it hurts but I couldn't think of doing anything different that would have made a difference.

This did! This changes things... But for good?


I woke up when I heard knocking at the door. I got up and looked through the peep hole in the door. It was black. Did it work or was someone covering it on the other side? Just to be save I walked back to the bedroom.

Yelling from the door stopped me in my tracks through. "Open this damn door now Sydney! I'm tired and hungery so just open it up! Let me in and talk to me!"

I ran to the door and flung it open! "What are you doing here?!" I screamed at Kyle.

"Me?! What am I doing here?! Well missy I could ask you the same question! How could you just disappear? And just leave a note?! I mean come on! Are you nuts!" Kyle screamed at me getting in my face, he's eyes blazing with his anger.

"Why are you here? How did you find me?"

"This isn't the first time you've tried to run away! Remember when you tried to get me to go with you that one time? You said that you wanted to go to New York! This was the frist place that I tried and I knew that you most likely wouldn't go far so as soon as I saw the hotles I looked in every parking lot and I saw yours." Kyle finally stopped yelling and whispered, "How could you leave me?"

"I didn't want to... I just had to. You don't understand. Everything has just went from good to confusing to hurt to being sceared... I hated the way people looked at me that night, like they were sorry for me, like I knew them and that if I didn't get there sorry it would make things worse... And you know that most of the people that looked truely sorry were people that I didn't even know. And the people that I do know were looking at me like I should do something, like I should yell and screan at them or hit Taylor... And the thing is that thats not me... I don't do those kinds of things... I can't."

I didn't know I was crying until Kyle put his hands on my cheeks and rubbed the tears away with his thumbs.

"I never wanted to leave you... I swear to you that you were everything that I was thinging about... I was sceared of what you would think of me, but I just couldn't stay. I'm so sorry."

I sobbed in his arms until I feel asleep, exhausted with everything that has been going on. Kyle picked me up and carried me into my