Our journey from engagement to marriage by Shipra Saini (surface ebook reader TXT) 📕

"It's hard to talk about." I whispered and lowered my head and looked down while walking.

"I want you to talk about it." He halt in his steps and so do I.

His voice was firm and soft and his grip on my hand tight and caressed his thumb at the back of my hand like he wants to assure me that he is here for me and not gonna live me.

"Bulli helps you at certain point to build a confidence in you and teach you how to tackle in a difficult situation but when it went overboard it haunts in your dream and effect your future life." I whispered in low voice and started walking again.

It's hard to talk about but I want to talk about it with someone. I never shared this thing with anyone but I want lessen the burden from my heart by talking about it.

"When my cousin and her boyfriend exposed my crush to everyone and make fun of me almost all senior students, things were not same after that day. High school never be easy for me but it was worst after that day." I whispered and gulped the lump which formed inside my throat.

"What happened after that day?" He asked me in a firm voice like he can feel my pain. His voice holding the emotions.

"Nothing was normal. Everyone started get back on me. They taunted me and have fun of me. My own friends talked shit about me behind my back. My class treated me like that I am burden on earth. But I want to forget everything and wanted to live normal. I was trying but then farewell party come. You Americans calls it prom but it's a farewell party to us. I didn't want to go but Shivani di forced me to attend the party. I was also excited for the party. I wanted to enjoy the last day of my high school." I gulped and took a deep breath try to control the forming tears in my eyes.

I never thought it was that hard to talk about. My heart is beating fast when everything was replaying in my mind.

"It was not a great party. No one was talking to me. I was feeling alone but I have no complaints because it was a last day of high school. When the party was about to end one of my calss mate came to me and said that she needs my help in college application and meet me in computer lab in five minutes but when I reached there, there was no one. Four boys were already present there and of them was whom I thought I have feelings for. His name was Anuj." My voice become heavy at the end. I felt Siddharth's grip on my hand become tighter. I took a deep breath to control my tears. They don't worth for my tears.

"They pushed me on the teacher's table. Two boys hold my hands and one of hold my legs tighter. I was screaming and asking for help but they covered my mouth with duct tape. Anuj rubbed a red bloodied wet colour on my face. After that my cousin came to the room and write looser on my both arms with same red paint. She said that she did it for fun and my punishment to laid my eyes on her boyfriend. I was afraid so much after that. That day sky also cry with me. After washing my face in washroom I waked home under heavy rain with my teary eyes, cursing myself to have feelings for such person who didn't even have a humanity. That day I lost my faith from everyone. That incident effects my college life. I was always afraid to talk anyone and I am happy for that because that's how no one can hurt me. That was the worst day of my life." I walked further holding my tears in my eyes when suddenly I halted in my steps when Siddharth's hand make me stop to walk further.

I looked back at him and his eyes holding the same pain of mine. Like he can feel my pain from his heart. He pulled me closer to him and took a slow steps towards him.

"Why didn't you tell anyone from your family about that?" He whispered. His voice was holding a pain.

Nothing would happen if I told my family. Riki brainwashed my family with her lies. My mother believed her more than I and the worst part was when my family looked at me with doubtful eyes. Nothing is painful than when your family doesn't believe you. I felt distant with my family.

"No one was going to believe me. It was no longer when mummy slapped me for a boy. Mummy even admit that they don't believe me when it comes to boys. Even Shivani di didn't understand me." I whispered lowly and lowered my eyelids.

Finally a lone tear escape from my eyes when I can't help to control them. My lips trembled but I bit them to control my sobs and tears escaped from my other eye also. Nothing was more painful when your family lost their faith on you. They don't believe you and can't see what you are going through and that time my family lost faith from me. They even admit it infront of me.But it's all in past I don't have any grudges against my family. I know they love me.

"Is that why you afraid of being judge." He cupped my face and wiped my tears with his both hand thumbs.

I nodded my head slowly still looking down.

"Preeti...I never thought for having a crush on someone is that hard for a small town girl and people will judge her so easily that treats her like she committed a murder." He whispered lowly while wiping my tears again when more tears pore down from my eyes.

"Preeti...look at me." I whispered lovingly still cupping my face between his palms.

I slowly raised my eyelids and looked into his eyes which holding the same pain as mine. He didn't judge me like others. His eyes holding the pain like he understand my pain closely.

"Do you know that you are the most amazing person I have ever met. What your classmates done to you taat showed their characters not yours. Never shred your precious tears for those who don't worth for it." He whispered closely to my face while making me comfort under his touch.

No one had ever said those comforting words to me. People will judge you easily by your actions even though you don't even mean that way. Their hurtful comments forced you to think that it must be your fault. But only few people is always there for you who really cared for you. Who hear you out without judging you and Siddharth is the same person in my life who understands me and not judge me for that where my own family judge me for someone.