Damaged Beyond Repair by Kashmira Kamat (KittyKash) (motivational novels txt) 📕

“Wow, I’m game.” Gosh, mom sure knew how to pull those bitchy instincts and I was her daughter.

With that the phone went dead. I could hardly see Nina’s facial expressions since my vision became too blurry. She quickly handed me a few Kleenex, “Do you know how cheap she made me feel?”

“It’s not your fault.”

I rubbed my temple. I knew I looked miserable, “Every. Damn. Thing, is my fault, Nina.” I dabbed the tissue to my eyes, smearing most of the liner, “Rowan lost his job because of me. Chez thinks I’m a liar and my own parents cut off my financial sources.”

Nina squeezed my hand with both of hers, and then she took over the empty space next to me. Usually you feel comforted in situations like these, but I always had an opposite effect. I cried harder.

“Why does everybody misunderstand us?” I cried softly, “I love Rowan so much, Nina. There’s no ulterior motive behind those feelings.”

She pushed her latte and her untouched chocolate donut towards me, like it was going to cheer me up. She was at least trying. I looked over at her with teary eyes; “My parents are blocking my cards.”

“How are you going to manage?”

 “I only have some money saved up, do you know of a job I can take up? Anything is fine. I just need a temporary job.”

Nina must have noticed the desperation in my voice and she looked like someone who’d do anything for me if I would just stop crying so she offered, “You know that diner, right? The Red Grill? Veronica is on temporary leave. I could talk to her if you want. They are looking for a replacement.” 

“But...You told me you were taking that job?” Nina had told me earlier about taking up a job at the nearest diner.

She began waving her hands at me, “Don’t worry about me. I’ll look for something else. Promise.”

I was already feeling like a job stealer. But one doesn’t protest when having nil choices, “Okay, I’ll take it.”

“Right, so I’ll speak with her and have her call you back.”

I pushed the donut back at her, “Thanks Nina. Please don’t tell Chez about this. He’ll be worried.”

“MLAS.”

“What’s that?”

“My lips are sealed,” she snorted, “DUH!”  

We watched a few bicycles and a few people walking their dogs. Kids taking long swings, their happy faces were making me jealous.

Nina decided to break the silence, “I was wondering y’know, if we could all go out together for dinner this weekend.”

“Together includes, who?”

“Don’t get mad, it’s just my idea of fun.” She was already under the suspicious eye, “Rowan, You, Me and Chez could go out together for dinner. How does that sound?”

I laughed in her face, making a few birds fly in the opposite direction.

“You’re really suggesting that? Chez and I aren’t speaking if you haven’t noticed yet and I’m really not sure how Rowan would react to a dinner night with my friends, Plus I know Chez would not leave an opportunity to spit in Rowan’s face. Sounds like a fancy dinner?”  

“I just think it would be a great opportunity to show Chez how great Rowan is. You think I’m not terrified of Mr. Masters, like c’mon, I used to end up so many times in his office just to get blown off.” She shuddered at the memory. Rowan seriously had an impact over Nina.

“Rowan is not like that.” I blushed at the mere mention of his name.

“I haven’t met him outside of University so I used to think he is pretty strict but I can see what he has done to you, Alana. You guys are so in love, I think it’s time you proved to Chez how wrong he is.” 

I nodded. “I’ll speak with Rowan about it, but I can’t guarantee he’s going to agree.”

“I’ll convince Chez, alright?”

And Nina launched into a long conversation about where we should go for dinner, and we settled with the new Pizza restaurant that had opened nearby. Seeing how small Carmel was, our options were limited. I was darn sure Rowan wouldn’t want to go since he directly fell into the ‘introvert category’ but then again I felt excited. I wanted to go out with Chez, Nina and my boyfriend and show them how great we were together.

                                                                                 ****

  I was expecting Rowan to flat out deny the dinner invitation but he surprised me with a wide grin and a ‘Sounds awesome.’ Does this guy give me a chance to guess?

It was yet another evening of slacking off; I was sprawled on the soft plush rug, watching re-runs of The Supernaturals while Rowan worked in the kitchen, dicing away the red peppers. I was introduced to a new fact that told me cooking was an art. The way his slender fingers worked as he diced each vegetable screamed expertise. I had a sudden urge to copy him, but I knew I couldn’t get past cutting my own finger. My cooking skills were shit and cooking for me equated reheating the frozen food.

I had done that mostly back at home and I was sick of it.

I hopped onto the island, dug my fingers into the moist green olive jar and popped one into my mouth. Rowan ignored me at first, concentrating on his cooking. When I had dug my hand into the jar for the fifth or the sixth time, he slapped my hand and said, “Don’t do that. You want to eat the olives, get yourself a bowl. You’re grossing me out.” then he smiled, I knew he was only teasing me, “I’m the boss. My house, my rules.”

“Yes, sir.”

There were a lot of things that I wanted to discuss with him, but I mostly didn’t want to get on his bad side at the end of the day. My questions were likely to taint his good mood; I took my chances nevertheless, “So how did the interview go?”

He shrugged, “I didn’t make it.”

Rowan had applied for a professor’s job at a nearby university which was hardly an hour away from Carmel. With Rowan’s qualifications and experiences, it came as a surprise to me that the jack-asses had rejected him, “Why didn’t they select you?”