At His Mercies by Marline J (famous ebook reader .txt) 📕

“How could I possibly be enjoying myself?” I asked sarcastically. Alex burst out laughing. 

“I take it you’re bored?” 

“What do you expect? I’ve been sitting here for hours, with absolutely nothing to do!” 

“Well,” Alex said and a roguish grin appeared on his lips that made him even more handsome than he already was, “One of my men shot a rabbit today. You can come outside and skin it.”

My eyes went wide and my jaw dropped. I stared up at him in disbelief. I take it back. Immediately. Cooking is not something I will do to get away from this boredom. 

“You cannot be serious.” I told him. 

“Oh, but I am. You eat of this food so you better help prepare it.” 

“I most certainly will not.” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. 

“Then I take it you don’t want any dinner?” Alex asked while he raised one eyebrow. I didn’t answer, just stared at him some more. 

“Suit yourself.” Alex turned around but just before he walked out of the tent I stopped him. 

“Wait.” I called. Alex turned to face me again and a slow smile spread across his face. 

“Oh, so you do want dinner?” He asked. Without a word I got up and followed him out of the tent. When I got to the fireplace, a rabbit was lying there, it’s neck turned in a strange way. I immediately knelt down next to it and my instincts told me to check whether it was alive. I slowly put my hand on its back and stroked its soft fur. 

“Go ahead.” Alex said. “Skin it.” 

“But...” I stuttered. “But it’s a rabbit!” I looked up at Alex with a begging expression on my face, without knowing exactly what I wanted. The rabbit was already dead, there was nothing I could do about it now.

“Have you never eaten rabbit before?” Alex asked.  “I have but... I never actually saw it... like this.” 

“You don’t know how to skin it, do you?” Alex said, catching on. 

“No.” I answered, glancing from him to the rabbit and back.  Alex sighed, grabbed a knife that was lying close by and knelt down next to me. 

“It is not very difficult. You take the rabbit like this,” he grabbed the rabbit and held it down, “and then you cut into it and pull the hide off.” I gasped and tears sprung into my eyes. I couldn’t help myself and got up, gathered my skirts and ran to the tent. I didn’t care about not having dinner anymore, I didn’t want any after what I’d just seen. I would never eat rabbit again in my life.  That evening while I was lying on the bed, Alex came in with a plate of stew. 

“Here Florence, eat.” He said and handed it to me. I stared at the plate and felt tears rise up again. 

“I’m fine, thank you.” I said and didn’t take the plate from him. 

“Florence,” He said exasperated. “You have to eat. Besides, the rabbit is already dead.” I couldn’t argue with that but I could still not get myself to eat that poor rabbit.

“I’m not hungry.” I said, and turned away. Alex put the plate a little bit away and sat on the bed to take his boots off. 

“Suit yourself. But mind you, we’re having rabbit stew for breakfast as well.”  I felt frustration rise up in me and the fact that my stomach was demanding food wasn’t making this situation any easier. 

“You’re doing that just to infuriate me, aren’t you?” I said angrily.  Alex stopped with what he was doing and turned to face me.

“Florence, around here we do not waste food. If there is any left from the previous night, we eat it the following morning,” he said sternly. “We do not have the luxury to throw it away or feed it to the animals.” His words struck me and I knew that he was criticizing my way of living. The need to argue and to take my family’s side rose within me and though I was always taught that I should take criticism, especially from a man, without saying a word back, I decided that I was not going to let him get away with this. Besides, it’s not like anyone here cared whether I acted like a lady or not. 

“Well, I’m sorry that I wasn’t brought up like you and that my father actually had a decent job and could pay to have maids and animals. Wait, actually, I am not sorry at all. Just because you choose to be lazy and steal instead of make a decent living doesn’t mean you have the right to criticize me.” 

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” Alex said as he stood up from the bed and faced me. 

“Oh no?” I asked, crossing my arms. 

“Do you know that it is the fault of men like your father that I did not get a decent job? My father was a fair and honest man and he was robbed by a rich Lord until he had nothing left. The Lord made sure that my parents were killed and my sister and I narrowly escaped the same fate. After that, I decided to take revenge. My sister went into prostitution and that was the only way we had enough money for food. As soon as I was old enough, I decided that robbing rich men was not as bad as I had always believed. I know what it is like to be hungry and that is why I never waste food.” With that Alex turned around and exited the tent. I stared after him, mouth agape, too shocked and stunned to be able to say a word or even move. Alex had just told me a piece of his history and his story made me feel like a spoiled little brat. When I was finally able to move again, I wanted to walk out of the tent to go after Alex but I knew there was a man standing right outside my tent who would not let me out. So instead I curled up on the bed and fell asleep. 

I woke up in the middle of the night to find that Alex was lying next to me. The light from the fire that was burning bright outside was enough to show me that Alex was awake. He was staring up at the roof of the tent. I turned around a little to face him and he looked at me.  We stared into each other’s eyes for a few long moments.

“I... I’m sorry.” I finally said. “I didn’t mean the things I said, I was just upset.” 

“I know. It’s fine.” Alex replied. Then he pulled me into his arms and kissed the top of my head.  A few minutes later Alex spoke again. “It’s not your fault you’re a spoiled little girl,” he teased. 

“Hey!” I acted offended as I tried to pull away. 

“Oh no you’re not going anywhere.” Alex said and he pulled me closer to him. I snuggled into him and fell asleep with a smile on my face. 

“Ms. Paston! Florence! Are you listening to a word I’m saying?” My tutor asked me. I snapped out of my flashback and stared up at him, a little shocked, realizing that I had been staring out the window with a content smile on my face. 

 “I’m sorry sir. I was just a little distracted.” I said politely. 

“It’s fine but don’t let it happen again.” My tutor said sternly. 

“I won’t.” I promised obediently. 

The rest of the day passed in a drag, until my mother came to find me in my room. 

 “James has requested that you spend the day with him tomorrow.” She told me, while flattening her graying hair on top of her head. 

 “And he couldn’t ask me this myself?” I couldn’t help but snap. 

 “Florence!” My mother scolded.

 “It is not suitable for a gentleman to request this of a lady before consulting her parents. He will ask you tomorrow at breakfast. Make yourself presentable and remember how important this wedding is.”  I sighed, frustrated at the fact that the wedding, and with that James’ money, was more important than my happiness. 

“Yes mother.” I said meekly and then turned because I did not want to face her any longer. I heard my mother sigh and then sit down on my bed. 

“Look Florence, I didn’t love your father either when we married. But look how good it has turned out.”  I whirled around to look at her. 

 “But were you in love with someone else?” I shot at her and then clasped my hand in front of my mouth when I realized what I’d just said. My mother’s eyes narrowed as she scrutinized my face. 

“Are you, Florence?” 

 “No.” I lied through my teeth. “I am not.” 

“Good. Because if you were, you would have to get over him as soon as possible.” My mother sent me a stern look and then walked out the door, without even saying goodnight. 

“Florence,” James asked me sweetly at breakfast the next morning, “Would you do me the honour of spending the day with me?” His hair was slicked back like always and he was wearing a neat coat with golden buttons. He looked like a... wimp. That’s what it was. 

“I’m sorry. My tutor is coming this morning and I cannot miss my studies.” I smiled slightly at him. 

“Florence!” My mother snapped. Then, she sent a warm, but fake, smile towards James’ parents.  “I am deeply sorry. Florence has always been such a fanatic learner. Of course she would like to spend the day with you, Mr. Nortam. She would be honoured. Wouldn’t you, Florence?” She said through clenched teeth.  I forced a smile to come to my lips when I looked at James.

“Of course I would.”  I didn’t say a word throughout breakfast, and when I was done eating I started fidgeting with my napkin. How was I going to get through an entire day of being in James’ company? For one, he seemed frightfully boring and for two, I knew that I could never be good enough for him. Besides, I was far too rebellious and the fact that I actually enjoyed being un-ladylike at times proved more than anything that I was not the right wife for James. And a third factor, I was not attracted to him in the least.  After breakfast James stood up and took my hand. 

 “I will meet you at the front door in half an hour.” He said, and then bent down to kiss my hand. I was very tempted to pull my hand away but instead I let him kiss me. I felt absolutely nothing as his soft, almost feminine lips touched my hand. I would be surprised if James could even handle a sword, I suddenly thought. And then, my thoughts inevitably went to Alex again. I remembered how his muscles tensed beneath his shirt when he was practicing his swordplay with one of his men. The way a few locks of his