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as the views of the mountains ahead grew, larger and larger. The loch seemed to go on and on, becoming narrower and narrower, and steeper and steeper, until eventually the head of the loch was passed.
They headed over a low pass, after which Andrew told Henry to take the A85 several miles ahead. It was a while before Henry noticed a signpost for the A85, but when they eventualy approached the junction, he took the right-hand lane and headed towards Stirling. Andrew simply relaxed, drinking a can of lager, though he still monitored the fuel gauge every now and then. There seemed to be few road signs, and fewer junctions, which made Henry wonder if he was going in the right direction.
Approaching another junction, Henry saw a sign that the road ahead, the A84, led to Stirling, but the A85 turned left and led to Perth. He asked Andrew which road to take, though Andrew was, by this time, half-asleep. Henry drove into the small town of Lochearnhead, and found a place to park the car. He looked at the road atlas, and then at his watch. It seemed they had quite a bit of time on their hands, so decided to head for Perth. He noticed a small road on the south side of Loch Earn, which led back to the A85. He thought about turning back, and getting something to eat, but decided to take, what he thought was, the scenic route along the south of the loch.
When Henry noticed a small road to his left, he turned down it. After passing a small hamlet, however, the road seemed to get smaller still. Instead of looking at the loch as he was driving, he had to watch the road in front of him, where there was one bump after another. This eventually woke Andrew, who looked around him.
“Where are we going?” he asked.
“Oh, that’s Loch Earn,” replied Henry, as Andrew thought to himself for a while.
“Shouldn’t we be on the other side of the loch?” queried Andrew, afterwhich Henry explained what had happened.
Andrew grabbed the road atlas and took a careful look at it, as the car bumped along.
“I wouldn’t have driven along this road myself, but I suppose one good thing will have come out of this,” Andrew commented.
“Oh, what’s that?” queried Henry, who was driving at 20 mph to try to keep the bumps to a minimum.
“It certainly will have tested the suspension of the car,” said Andrew. “You don’t mind if we stop at some point when we reach the A85, so we can have a look?”
“No, not all,” replied Henry. “I could do with a bite to eat, too.”
“That’s settled then,” agreed Andrew. “There’s one slight snag, however.”
“What’s that?” asked Henry.
“We have to get there first,” said Andrew. “At this rate, it may take a while.”
When they eventually reached the A85, at St Fillans, it had gone 11.30. They found a small road just outside the village, where they stopped to check on the car’s suspension, foor which everything seemed fine.
“Would you mind I drove for now?” Andrew asked.
“Are you sure you’re okay to drive?” Henry queried. “You did have a sleep, not to mention a bit to drink.”
“I’m okay,” Andrew replied. “I only had one can of lager. I did have a bit of a rest, but I couldn’t sleep, what with all that bumping about on that little road you took us along.”
“Are we still alright for time to get to Edinburgh airport?” asked Henry after he looked at his watch.
“We should be okay,” said Andrew, at which point he picked up the ignition keys from Henry.
“Do you want to turn back into the village, to get a bite to eat?” Andrew asked Henry. “We don’t know where the next shop is.”
“I noticed a few larger villages a little way ahead, on the atlas,” said Henry. “We can stop there,” at which point they got into the car and drove off.
They stopped at the next village, after which it was ‘full steam ahead’. They reached the outskirts of Perth at about 12.45, and turned onto the A9, which led to the M90 and Edinburgh. Andrew seemed particularly excited. Once they had got beyond Perth, the traffic on the motorway began to reduce. At this point, Andrew began to press a little harder on the accelerator. Henry seemed unconcerned at first, but then looked closer at the speedometer, where he noticed the car travelling at 85 miles per hour. On the car went, 90, 95, 100 miles per hour.
“Are you testing the car for speed?” Henry asked.
“This car performs pretty well, don’t you think?” said Andrew, as he pressed harder on the accelerator.
Henry was becoming concerned, as he saw the speedometre reach 110 miles per hour.
“I wouldn’t go any faster, if I were you,” he hinted to Andrew. “I haven’t tried this car at these speeds.”
“Have you any idea how fast this car can go?” Andrew asked him.
“I think this is fast enough,” replied Henry, as the speedometre approached 115 mph.
“It feels alright to me,” said Andrew.
“You don’t want to go too fast – there may be police watching. We don’t want to be stopped now – it may delay the journey and you may miss your flight.”
“Okay, okay, okay,” moaned Andrew, as he lifted his right foot to let the car cruise along the motorway.
Unfortunately, Henry had unintentionally foreseen the future. Though the car was losing speed, it was still travelling way above the speed limit, and before long, they noticed a police car in the mirror, chasing them, blue lights flashing and siren wailing.
“Oh God!” shrieked Henry as he put his hand over his head. “I tried to tell you you were going too fast.”
“The car is slowing down,” said Andrew. “Besides, how do you know they’re chasing us?”
“I haven’t seen any other cars going over 100 miles per hour on the motorway, have you?!” exclaimed Henry.
“Relax, they may be called out to an emergency somewhere ahead,” suggested Andrew.
As they continued and turned into the middle lane, however, the police car followed them. It was clear that the police were chasing Henry and Andrew.
“Okay, okay,” said Andrew in a calm(-ish) voice. “Leave this to me.”
“I had intended to - it was you who drove the car at those extortionate speeds,” Henry told him, before a thought occurred to him.
“Look don’t worry,” insisted Andrew, as he drove the car into the left-hand lane. “I’m a councillor, remember. I’ve got a plane to catch. They won’t do anything.”
“On the other hand, perhaps I should speak to them,” suggested Henry. “What if they breathalise you?”
“I’ll be alright,” said Andrew. ”I only had one can of lager. That’s not over the limit, and not enough to be arrested for.”
“I hope you’re right,” said Henry.
As Andrew continued to slow the car down, he pulled over to the left hand lane, and evenyully, to the hard shoulder. The police car continued following their movements again. Eventually, the car came to a complete halt, as did police car. As a policeman got out and walked over to them, Andrew wound down his window.
“Good afternoon,” said Andrew. “How can I help you?”
“Can you confirm you’re name and address, please?” the policeman requested, as another policeman went along to other side of the car.
“Yes indeed,” said Andrew. “I’m councillor Andrew MacDonald, of 5 Clach Nah Beighan, of Lower Barva, on the Isle of Lewis.”
“Councillor, eh?” the policeman commented. “Was you driving at over 100 miles per hour?”
“I’m ever so sorry, but I have a plane to catch,” said Andrew. “I don’t drive at that sort of speed regularly.”
“Well as a councillor, you should have known better than to drive at that speed at all!” the policeman told him. “It looks like you’ll probably miss the flight anyway, by the time I’ve finished with you.”
“I am sorry, sir, it won’t happen again, I can promise you,” Andrew pleaded to the policeman, as he showed him his driving licence.
“Hhmmm,“ mumbled the policeman. “I see you have no points currently on your licence.”
“I don’t drive at those speeds, sir,” replied Andrew. “There are no motorways where I come from.”
“Well that’s as maybe,” said the policeman, as he took a small plastic bag out of his jacket. “I’m afraid I’m going to ask you to step out of the car and to breathe into this bag.”
Meanwhile, on the passenger’s side of the car, another policeman was quizzing Henry. Henry spoke to the policeman politely, helping him with his inquiries, but felt he may have to use his ‘force’.
“Thank you for your assistance, but can you step out of the car for a few moments, please?” the policeman asked him.
Henry stared at the policeman forcefully.
“I’m afraid that won’t be necessary,” he told the policeman, who simply smiled, and believed that Henry’s statement had come from his superintendent via his intercom.
“Hey, Robbie, get me another breathaliser bag, will you?” the other policeman called to him as he saw his colleague walking back to their vehicle.
“Surely that won’t be necessary?” Andrew queried. “You can see from the last test that my alcohol level is below the legal limit.”
“While we’re here on the motorway, sir, there’s a lot of air blowing about,” the policeman told Andrew. “I’d like you to take a second test, so we can be sure you are below the legal limit.”
“I’m afraid that won’t be necessary,” Henry told the policeman, who seemed a bit harder to fool than his colleague.
The policeman waited a little while, after which Henry repeated his advice, to which the policeman thanked him and walked back to his vehicle. Andrew was astounded.
“How did you manage to do that?” Andrew asked him.
“Oh, I think he must have received a call from his local police station,” said Henry.
“Maybe, but usually, when someone tells a policeman that their request won’t be necessary, you’ll be nicked,” Andrew confessed.
“Why, have you been nicked before?” Henry asked.
“No, no, I’m pleased to say,” replied Andrew. “But I know a few people who’ve tried that sort of thing, and never got away with it.”
“I’m sure you won’t mind if I continue with the driving from here?” Henry then said to him. “I think it may be prudent if you stay in the back for the rest of the journey.”
“That’s fine,” said Andrew as he threw the car keys to Henry. “I’ll finish my other can of lager. Wake me up when we get to the Forth Road Bridge - I’ll give you some money to pay for the toll.”
After they got back into the car, Henry waited until the police vehicle had left the hard shoulder before driving off. They had an hour left to get to Edinburgh airport, though as Andrew only had a local flight to catch, he could afford to book-in a little later than usual.
It didn’t take long to get to the airport. They arrived just before 2.30, at which point Henry woke up Andrew.
“Are we here already?” he yawned as he looked around him.
“It didn’t take too long,” Henry told him. “Shall I park in the short-stay car park?”
“You can stay here temporarily, if you like. I don’t have much baggage to take with me,” said Andrew, as he took out a pound of his pocket, which he gave to Henry for the Forth Road Bridge toll.
“What did you think of the car?” Henry asked.
“Good, good,” replied Andrew, as he opened his door to stretch is legs. “It was eco-friendly,
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