Lessons Learned by Kalai Selvi Arivalagan (top 50 books to read .TXT) 📕

 The ultimate lesson that life has taught me: "Go with the flow".  

 Whenever I faced situations that tested my patience and made my heart swell with unknown pressure, I keep on repeating these words - Go with the flow.

In a way, it helped me to feel at peace and bring my anxiety level down.   It helped me to handle situation applying my head, instead of taking it to my heart.

Getting emotional is always easy.  But to face a situation with a stone like heart is not an easy one.  Yet, it must be the choice of that stressful moment.  It helped me to overcome so many situations that otherwise would have brought my spirits low and make me feel depressed and unhappy.

The recent experience at the work place made me decide once again, 'keep my mouth shut.' Working among a set of youngsters who belong to Gen Y, made me once again feel 'Hi, you are a baby boomer, keep your mouth shut.'

Recession has taken in its toll, the bright prospects of people who are called baby boomers. I don't know if whatever I did was out of my own interest or a mere assumption that they may need my expert opinions to improve their writing skills. Unexpectedly it hit me hard on my face just like a boomerang. Maintain your distance and keep yourself aloof is what they want to tell me. With a heavy heart I decided I will keep my mouth shut.

The past experiences have also taught me to keep my mouth shut and open it only if it is much necessary. It is going to be one year here and I have misunderstood everyone around me. They are what they are and the fault lies only with me, I failed to understand my position and have forgotten the thin line that separated me from them. Yes, it is a lesson learned. Keep my mouth shut.

Even while we were living as a joint family, people around me always wanted me to keep my mouth shut and carry on with my work. Even if I found something wrong, I must keep my mouth shut. No one wanted me to question and enquire why it happened so. Is there any fault in the way I tell things or do they don't want me to share my questions? Anyway I learned my lesson to keep my mouth shut and open only to eat.

 One of the lessons that I have learned after being exploited for many years is never to exploit others. Some people may tell that I will get exploited only if I allow that to happen. But no one can deny the fact that when circumstances decide your fate, exploitation will be the first one to catch the veins. After missing some wonderful opportunities much against my wish, my agony of getting exploited started when I started to work as a kindergarten teacher in a primary school.

For a meager income I accepted to work with a valid reason that I don't want to let my family go hungry even without a single meal. With so many dreams and self acclaimed skills, I learned to stoop my level down, so that our hunger will be conquered. Exploitation has been right there in my life for more than 25 years. Though I know clearly that I am being exploited, when people take me granted and make me slog, I could not tell 'no'. The reason is I don't want to let my family go hungry.

Whatever it may be, I have decided not to exploit anyone for my sake. I don't talk about lucky ones who get a well paid job and enjoy life. I want to talk about people who slog like slaves for pennies to get their stomachs filled. In Chennai, I can see so many people employed for a few thousand rupees and work with their half filled stomachs. We could not blame them for their sufferings. People suffer due to choice and not because of chance. I read this quote somewhere.

When choice becomes the ultimate thing to decide, every one succumbs to the heavy strings of fate. My humble request to every one is 'Never exploit others for your sake.' The tears of the exploited people are strong. People who exploit others will have their turn one day. Something will happen to make them realize how painful it is to get exploited.

Now also I remember those words my mother kept on repeating:

Good thoughts, Good action, Good people

These are the three things we must always wish to have with us.

It is always a blessing to live with good people, who have good thoughts and who always shun bad and do only good to others.

Whatever challenges you face in your life, good deeds, good thoughts and good people always come to your rescue.

The vibrant positive energy will always be there around you and help you to be good at any circumstance in your life.

I remember the comment once I received from an elderly person: "Too good to believe"

In this materialistic world when people wish to have a comfortable life at all levels what I tell may sound weird. But my experience has taught me always wish good and that will invite good things to you.

Lesson learned: Be good always to bring in good tidings at your side.

All through this life, I have been a sensitive person. I could not resist reacting at once to whatever that I felt is not right. The three years I worked at South India AIDS Action Programme gave me a chance to come out of this. I got the opportunity to attend many counseling workshops and interact with people who faced much stress in life. Numerous sessions that discussed so many sensitive issues made me insensitive to petty things in life. I realized life is to live and it is not worth to have grudges at heart. In short, learn to be thick skinned. In detail, learn to ignore things that will stand in your way of improvement.

I am now at ease and could face easily a situation that could test my nerves. At the same time, my mind silently works behind and thinks how to handle such a situation in a better way and come out successful. It is not easy to practice, but I tried my level best and have succeeded in it.

Now a days every office conducts communication sessions to strengthen the relationship between the employees and the management. In a corporate environment, stress fills every divided bay. Targets take the priority and the human beings are treated as machines with life. At first this situation looked overwhelming and scary to me. Yet, I found a way out. I planned and scheduled my work and this helped me to finish everything on time.

Earlier, when we moved out of the joint family, we were at loss. People at home cheated us and turned ungrateful. Loosing everything, except my education and knowledge at hand, we walked out of them. Initially, it was so painful to forget everything and lead a normal life. Once a friend asked me to forgive them and start our life afresh. That was an eye opener. From that day onwards I started to lead a new life.

Even if I meet them now on my way to the office or else where, I could walk with my chin upright and ignore their stares. Whatever I did was my responsibility as the eldest one and still God is there to guide me in a better way. I am here to live my life and I will cherish every minute I am here in this world. Let God make them realize their faults. Till then, I will be thick skinned and move forward with out a grudge.

Remember young folks, you will also get old one day and life will make you realize how you ever took the least initiative to