Gan Bei! by Kevin Smith (little red riding hood ebook .TXT) 📕

Boss Lady Wang said tapping the American on the shoulder.

He spun around, his elbow slipping off the table, nearly sending him to the floor.

“Whoa, you drink enough,” she said.

Big Red Nose grinned widely, noticing the attraction now covered every inch of her, from a larger bosom to a shapelier rear. And, even better, there were now two of her.

“Another ‘Head of the Second Pot,’ please, beautiful,” he slurred gracelessly.

“Beautiful? Ha! Blue Eyes is flirting with the boss’s wife?” She said it loud enough to bring out Boss Woo.

“Hey, my foreign-friend, you flirt with my wife? Well, you flirt, you must also buy her new purse, listen to her talk all day – yaw, yaw, yaw – still want to flirt?” he asked, daring the customer to take the challenge.

“Later,” Big Red Nose said, tossing back another shot.

“Later? Later? In my restaurant he flirts with my wife and when I ask if he wants more, he says ‘later.’ Foreigner balls very big - brains not so much.”

A glass cracked when the American slammed it down after a particularly rough drink.

The Chinese became infuriated when he tried to do the same, only hurting his palm instead.

During the American’s sixth bottle, he looked to his right and saw that the German had magically disappeared. So did his plate and his wasted glass of white alcohol. The American’s grandma – half German - had warned him of their craftiness, but he hadn’t realized they could vanish. It didn’t matter – there was a competition and he aimed on winning.

“Give-up?” the Chinese man asked, repeating himself until the words finally made sense.

“Bahhhhhhh!” is all the American could utter.

“Aye! No good, no good at all,” the challenger yelled back, jumping from his bench. “You’re a bad man!” he finished before running into the glass door.

And, like the German, he disappeared.

“Hey, blue eyes, you won!” the boss’s wife, turned supermodel said in a seductive voice.

The American jumped up, his fist punching the air. He’d won and Boss Lady Wang was the prize.

The lights went out in the restaurant.

A disoriented American found himself alone, without his prize, in the alley.

He couldn’t remember if he lived east or west of wherever he was.

With snow beginning to fall, the darkness swallowed up the victor as he stumbled north.

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Publication Date: 11-30-2009

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