The Adventures of Gil Blas of Santillane by Alain René le Sage (good books to read in english .TXT) 📕

in that! his honour was his weak side! for instead of bidding up

to my uncle’s estimate of ten or twelve pistoles, the rascal had

the impudence to offer three ducats, which I accepted with as

light a heart as if I had got the best of the bargain.

Having disencumbered myself of my mule in so tradesmanlike a

manner, I went with my landlord to a carrier who was to set out

early the next morning for Astorga, and engaged to call me up in

time. When we had settled the hire of the mule, as well as the

expenses on the road, I turned back towards the inn with

Corcuelo, who, as we went along, got into the private history of

this muleteer. When I had been pestered with all the tittle-tattle of the town about this fellow, the changes were just

beginning to ring on some new subject; but, by good luck, a

pretty-looking sort of a man very civilly interrupted my

loquacious friend. I left them together, and sauntered on without

the slightest suspicion of being at all concerned in their

discourse.

I ordered supper as soon as I got to the inn. It was a fish day:

but I thought eggs were better suited to my finances. While they

were getting ready I joined in conversation with the landlady,

whom I had not seen before. She seemed a pretty piece of goods

enough, and such a stirring body, that I should have concluded,

if her husband had not told me so, her tavern must have plenty of

custom. The moment the omelet was served up I sat down to table

by myself, and had scarcely got the relish of it, when my

landlord walked in, followed by the man who had stopped him in

the street. This pleasant gentleman wore a long rapier, and

might, perhaps, be about thirty years of age. He came up to me in

the most friendly manner possible. Mr Professor, says he, I have

just now heard that you are the renowned Gil Blas of Santillane,

that ornament of Oviedo and luminary of philosophy. And do my

eyes behold that very greatest of all great scholars and wits,

whose reputation has run hither so fast before him? Little do you

think, continues he, directing his discourse to the landlord and

landlady, little do you imagine, I say, what good luck has

befallen you. Why, you have got hold of a treasure. In this young

gentleman you behold the eighth wonder of the world. Then running

up and throwing his arms about my neck, Excuse me, added he; but

worlds would not bribe me to suppress the rapturous emotions your

honoured presence has excited.

I could not answer him so glibly as I wished, not so much for

want of words as of breath; for he hugged me so tight that I

began to be alarmed for my wind pipe. As soon, however, as I had

got my head out of durance, I replied, Signor cavalier, I had not

the least conception that my name was known at Pegnaflor. Known?

resumed he in the same pompous style; we keep a register of all

great persons within a circuit of twenty leagues round us. You

have the character of a prodigy here; and I have not a shadow of

doubt, but one day or other Spain will be as proud of numbering

you among her rare productions, as Greece of having given birth

to her seven wise men. This fine speech was followed as before;

and I really began to think that with all my classical honours I

should at last be doomed to share the fate of Antaeus. If I had

been master of ever so little experience, I should not have been

the dupe of his rhodomontade. I must have discovered him by his

outrageous compliments, to be one of those parasites who swarm in

every town, and get into a stranger’s company on his arrival, to

appease the wolf in their stomachs at his expense; but my youth

and vanity tempted me to draw a quite opposite conclusion. My

admirer was very clever in my eyes, and I asked him to supper on

the strength of it. Oh! most willingly, cried be: with all my

heart and soul. My fortunate star predominates, now that I have

the honour of being in company with the illustrious Gil Blas of

Santillane, and I shall certainly make the most of my good

fortune as long as it lasts. My appetite is rather delicate, but

I will just sit down with you by way of being sociable, and if I

can swallow a bit! only just not to look sulky; for we

philosophers are careless of the body.

These words were no sooner out of his mouth, than my panegyrist

took his seat opposite to me. A cover was laid for him in due

form and order. First he fell on the omelet with as much

perseverance as if he had not tasted food for three whole days.

By the complacency with which he eyed it I was morally certain

the poor pancake was at death’s door. I therefore ordered its

heir apparent to succeed; and the business was despatched with

such speed, that the second made its appearance on the table,

just as we; — no: — I beg pardon; — just as he had taken the

last lick of its predecessor. He pressed forward the main

business, however, with a diligence and activity proportioned to

the importance of the object he had in view: so that he contrived

to load me with panegyric on panegyric, without losing a single

stroke in the progress of mastication. Now all this gave me no

slender conceit of my pretty little self. When a man eats, he

must drink. The first toast of course was my health. The second,

in common civility, was my father and mother, whose happiness in

having such an angel of a son, he could not sufficiently envy or

admire. All this while he kept filling my glass, and challenging

me to keep pace with him. It was impossible to be backward in

doing justice to such excellent toasts and sentiments: the

compliments with which they were seasoned did not come amiss; so

that I got into such a convivial mood, at observing our second

omelet to disappear not insensibly, as just to ask the landlord

if he could not find us a little bit of fish. Master Corcuelo,

who to all appearance played booty with the parasite, told me he

had an excellent trout; but those who eat him must pay for him. I

am afraid he is meat for your masters. Meat for our masters!

exclaims my very humble servant in an angry tone of voice: that

is more than you know, my friend. Are you yet to learn that the

best of your larder is not too good for the renowned Gil Blas of

Santillane? Go where he will, he is fit to table with princes.

I was very glad that he took up the landlord’s last expression;

because if he had not, I should. I felt myself a little hurt at

it, and said to Corcuelo with some degree of hauteur: Produce

this trout of yours, and I will take the consequences. The

landlord, who had got just what he wanted, set himself to work,

and served it up in high order. At the first glance of this third

course I saw such pleasure sparkling in the parasite’s eyes, as

proved him to be of a very complying temper; just as ready to do

a kindness by the fish, as by those said eggs of which he had

given so good an account. But at last he was obliged to lay down

his arms for fear of accidents; as his magazine was crammed to

the very throat. Having eat and drank his fill, he bethought him

of putting a finishing hand to the farce. Master Gil Blas, said

he, as he rose from the table, I am too well pleased with my

princely entertainment to leave you without a word of advice, of

which you seem to stand in much need. From this time forward be

on your guard against extravagant praise. Do not trust men till

you know them. You may meet with many another man, who, like me,

may amuse himself at your expense, and perhaps carry the joke a

little further. But do not you be taken in a second time, to

believe yourself; on the word of such fellows, the eighth wonder

of the world. With this sting in the tail of his farewell speech

he very coolly took his leave.

I was as much alive to so ridiculous a circumstance, as I have

ever been in after-life to the most severe mortifications. I did

not know how to reconcile myself to the idea of having been so

egregiously taken in, or, in fact, to lowering of my pride. So,

so! quoth I, this rascal has been putting his tricks upon

travellers, has he? Then he only wanted to pump my landlord! or

more likely they were both in a story. Ah! my poor Gil Blas, thou

hadst better hide thy silly head! To have suffered such knaves as

these to turn thee into ridicule! A pretty story they will make

of this! It is sure to travel back to Oviedo; and will give our

friends a hopeful prospect of thy success in life. The family

will be quite delighted to think what a blessed harvest all their

pious advice has produced. There was no occasion to preach up

morals to thee; for verily thou hast more of the dupe than the

sharper in thy composition. Ready to tear my eyes out or bite my

fingers off from spite and vexation, I locked myself up in my

chamber and went to bed, but not to sleep; of which I had not got

a wink when the muleteer came to tell me, that he only waited for

me to set out on his journey. I got up as expeditiously as I

could; and while I was dressing Corcuelo put in his appearance,

with a little bill in his hand; — a slight memorandum of the

trout! — But paying through the nose was not the worst of it;

for I had the vexation to perceive, that while I was counting

over the cost, this hangdog was chuckling at the recollection of

the night before. Having been fleeced most shamefully for a

supper, which stuck in my stomach though I had scarcely come in

for a morsel of it, I joined the muleteer with my baggage, giving

to as many devils as there are saints in the calendar, the

parasite, the landlord, and the inn.

CH. III. — The muleteer’s temptation on the road; its

consequences, and the situation of Gil Blas between Scylla and

Charybdis.

I WAS not the only passenger. There were two young gentlemen of

Pegnaflor; a little chorister of Mondognedo, who was travelling

about the country, and a young tradesman of Astorga, returning

home from Verco with his new-married wife. We soon got

acquainted, and exchanged the usual confidence of travellers,

telling one another whence we came and whither we were going. The

bride was young enough; but so dark-complexioned, with so little

of what a man likes to look at in a woman, that I did not think

her worth the trouble. But she had youth and a good crummy person

on her side, and the muleteer, being rather less nice in his

taste, was resolved to try if he could not get into her good

graces. This pretty project occupied his ingenuity during the

whole day; but he deferred the execution till we should get to

Cacabelos, the last place