Shakespeare's Lost Years in London by Arthur Acheson (audio ebook reader .txt) 📕

pray you, do not put that sodden water into your bellie.

C. I like it as well as wine, chiefly this hot weather.

T. He that drinks wine drinks blood, he that drinks water drinks
fleame (phlegm).

H. I love to drink wine after the Dutch fashion.

T. How do they drinke it, I pray you?

H. In the morning, pure; at dinner, without water, and at night as it
comes from the vessel.

M. I like this rule; they are wise, and God's blessing light upon
them.

H. A slice of bacon would make us taste this wine well.

S. What, ho! set that gammon of bacon on the board.

* * * * *

M. God be thanked, I am at a truce with my stomach.

T. In faith, I would stay until the bells do ring.

S. You were not fasting then when you came here?

M. I had only drunk a little Malmslie.

T. And I a good draught of Muscatine, and eat a little bread.

S. Bring the meat away, in God's name.

R. The meat is not enough yet.

* * * * *

S. Take away that empty pot, set some bread upon the table and put
some salt in the salt cellar, and make roome for the second messe.

R. Now, comes the roast.

S. Welcome may with his flowers.

T. And good speed may our barke have.

S. The Jews do not look for their Messias with more devotion than I
have looked for the roast meat.

* * * * *

S. Set that capon upon the table, and those chickens, those rabbits,
and that hen, that goose; those woodcock, those snipes, those larks,
those quails, those partridges, those pheasants and that pasty of
venison.

R. Here is everything ready.

N. You have led us to a wedding.

S. I pray you, cut up that hen, I pray God it be tender.

C. Alas, I think she was dam to the cock that crowed to St. Peter.

S. I thought that so soon as I saw her.

N. I beseech you, sir, will you carve some of that pheasant?

M. They be offices that I love to do.

N. I will one day fill my bellie full of them.

S. Master Andrew, will it please you to eat an egg?

A. With all my heart, sir, so be it new laid.

S. As new as may be; laid this morning.

A. I love new-laid eggs well.

S. Sirra, go cause a couple of eggs to be made readie.

R. By and by, will you have them hard or soft?

A. It is no matter, I love them better raire.

T. An egg of an hour, bread of a day, kidd of a month, wine of six,
flesh of a year, fish of ten, a woman of fifteen, and a friend of a
hundred, he must have that will be merrie.

* * * * *

S. What aileth Master T. that he looks so sad?

T. I am not very well at ease.

S. What feel you, where grieves it you?

T. I feel my stomach a little over-cloyde.

N. Shall I teach you a good medicine?

* * * * *

H. My mother, of happy memorie, was wont to tell me that a pill of
wheat, of a hen the days work sweat, and some vine juice that were
neat was best physick I could eat.

M. Your mother was a woman worthy to govern a kingdom.

* * * * *

S. My masters, you see here the period of this poor dinner; the best
dish you have had hath been your welcome.

H. As that hath fed our minds so have the others fed our bodies well.

S. It grieves me that you have been put to such penance, but yet I
hope you will excuse me.

C. If doing such penance a man might win heaven, O sweet penance for
a man to do every day."

Portions of the sixth chapter, with its talk of divers necessary prophetic and proverbial precepts for a traveller, evidently supplied Shakespeare with the hint for Scene iv. Act II. of the _First Part of Henry IV._, between Falstaff and Prince Hal, wherein Falstaff personates the prince's father.

"S. Mister Peeler, whatsoever I shall tell you, according to my
wonted manner, I will speak as plainly unto you as though you were my
son, and therefore pardon me, if I shall seem eyther too familiar, or
too homely with you.

P. Say on boldly, for I shall be very proud if it please you to
account me as your child, and that I may repute you as my father.

S. First, my loving Mister Peeler, if you purpose to come unto the
wished end of your travel, have always your mind and thought on God."

This highly moral preamble is followed by much ungodly, worldly wisdom.

"S. And if you will be a traveller and wander safely through the
world, wheresoever you come have always the eyes of a falcon that you
may see far, the ears of an ass that you may hear well, the face of
an ape that you may be ready to laugh, the mouth of a hog to eat all
things, the shoulder of a camel that you may bear anything with
patience, the legs of a stag that you may flee from dangers, and see
that you never want two bags very full; that is, one of patience, for
with it a man overcomes all things, and another of money, for,

They that have good store of crownes,
Are called lordes, though they be clownes;

and gold hath the very same virtue that charity hath, it covereth a
multitude of faults, and golden hammers break all locks, and golden
meedes do reach all heights, have always your hand on your hat, and
in your purse, for,

A purse or cap used more or less a year
Gain many friends, and do not cost thee dear.

Travelling by the way in winter time, honour your companion, so shall
you avoid falling into dangerous places. In summer go before, so
shall not the dust come into your eyes. Setting at board, if there be
but little bread, hold it fast in your hand, if small store of flesh,
take hold on the bone, if no store of wine, drink often, and unless
you be required, never offer any man either salt, etc."

The ninth chapter, wherein they "plausibly discourse of news of the Court and of courtiers of this day, and of many other matters of delight," is full of Falstaffian paradox, and reminiscent of Justice Shallow's relations with Jane Nightwork.

"C. What is become of your neighbour, I mean the old doating man
grown twice a child?

T. As old as you see him he has of late wedded a young wench of
fifteen years old.

C. Then he and she will make up the whole bible together; I mean the
old and new testament.

T. To an old cat a young mouse.

C. Old flesh makes good broth.

T. What has become of his son that I see him not?

C. He was put in prison for having beaten an enemy of his.

T. Be wrong or right prison is a spite.

C. A man had need look to himself in this world.

T. What is become of his fair daughter whom he married to what you
call him that was sometime our neighbour?

C. She spins crooked spindles for her husband and sends him into
Cornwall without ship or boat.

T. What, does she make him wear the stag's crest then?

C. You have guessed right and have hit the nail on the head.

T. His blood is of great force and virtue then.

C. What virtue can his blood have, tell me in good faith?

T. It is good to break diamonds withal.

C. Why, man's blood cannot break