The Story of Miss James by Yessy (top inspirational books txt) 📕

In the background you can hear music. As she stares through the window
everyone seems to be having fun. Dancing, screaming, laughing, without a care in the world. How envious she becomes of those who seem to be carefree and happy.

Meanwhile her best friend is still astonished from what she just said. She tries to calm Ms. James by putting her arms around her, giving her hug and smiling. Ms. James looks at her embarrased, ashamed and heartbroken because of her lawless perfomance.

Ms. James commands her best friend. "It's time for you to go in. I don't want you to miss out, go ahead and have fun. Leave me here in my misery. Soon I'll recover myself and gain the power that has been drained away."

"But you haven't answer my question" she replies. "I will stay here as long as you need, I can't go in and leave you like this. Is there anything I can do to help you and make you feel better?"

Ms. James looks at her, grateful for having such a friend that deeply cares about her.

"No, it is okay, trust me. I will talk to him as soon as I can. The faster I speak my mind, the better. I can't wait to take this burden off my back. I don't want to ruin your night. After all it is a lovely party. Thank you, you have done enough already. You listened to me, exactly what I needed, just someone to listen."

Her best friend leaves worried about the outcome of her dearest friend, Ms. James. But she trust her completely and knows she will never attempt anything foolish. She walks away from Ms. James. As she does, she waves her hand, saying good-bye.

"Well it is time." Ms. James says to herself. She wipes off the tears, fixes her outfit and stands tall, not knowing what she is about to become.
As Ms. James walks dreadfully to open the door that will lead to the her final fate, there he is. Looking as radiant and ravishing as he always did. As they stumble, their bodies reflect a certain insecurity and nervous reaction. They both sigh as they apologize for the inconvenience. She smiles and ask the most infamous mister, the sole owner of her heart:

"I know this is rather unexpected, but may I please talk to you?"

Surprised he answers: "Of course you may, is something wrong?"

"No, not at all, I just wish to express my feelings in a rather important matter"

Ms. James takes a deep breath...

"I love you, I always have and after all this time I always will, years have not been enough for me to erase the beautiful memories you and I built. I am sorry for telling this all of the sudden. But I made a huge mistake by letting you go. My pride got in the way. But time has permitted me to see that I was wrong. I apologize, please forgive me. I just wanted to let you know how I felt..." and Ms. James turns away...

The gentleman is shocked, he breaths heavily and sighs, not knowing what to do or what to say, for this confession has been outstanding in every way. Never, not even when they were together Ms. James had spoken so bluntly about her regards.

He answers: "I forgive you, what do you want to do then?

Ms. James is astonished as she contemplates the civility of his question.

Calmly she replies: "I don't know."

He suggests: "Well what was the purpose of expressing your feelings? Do you want to continue with this relationship, are you giving up or do you want to start over?"

Ms. James thinks. This is not what she expected. She thought he was going to reject her. Now she is perplexed and speechless.

He becomes inpatient: "You always do the same thing. You have not changed, always selfish, self-centered, it's all about your feelings. Why are you so conceited? After all this time why didn't you say anything? I waited Miss James, I patiently waited for you. You better than anybody knew exactly how I felt. I wanted you to be my wife, to spend the rest of our lives together, to built a family, to love each other until there is no more want. All of the sudden you leave me, because of your insecurities and now after all this years you tell that you do love me, that you made a mistake which is great but you do not know what you want to do about it. You treat me like a fool. Whatever it is that you want or feel, I will no longer wait for your decision. I will not play any of your games. This time I will think of myself." After taking a deep breath, with agony replies:" This is over, I am done Ms. James, this is it, I can't do this anymore."

Miss James is shattered. All she needed was a few minutes to digest his reaction. She loved him dearly and after mustering up the courage to express her feelings, he becomes impatient and snaps at her. Filled with dissapointment she utters: "If you waited a few minutes, you could've have what you always wanted, but your lack of patience show the reasons that led me to end this relationship in the first place are still there. You always think the worse of me, expect the worse from me. How can I be with someone who calls me selfish, conceited and self-centered? When all I did throughout all our years together was to give my entire heart to you, live for you? I guess that wasn't enough. Well you are right. This is over, completely over."

And she runs away, with her eyes filled with tears, heartbroken.

A few months passed by. "Look at her! Does she look awful or what?"- people replied with a selfish disdain towards the inferiority of Miss James circumstances. -"She let him go, I heard, he actually came towards her and she rejected him, what a proud and conceited girl!"

Little did they know that Miss James felt no regret over her decision. If she looked bitter it had nothing to do with the fact that she said no. Of course she felt pride, her dignity as a human being was far more important than the opinion of others. But she wasn't the proud or conceited girl that had rejected the amiable man before. She had realized that to be the kind of woman she often professed to be, there were some mayor changes that needed to occur in her life, accomplishments of an emotional sort.

Silly peoples, ignorant and ill-mannered neighbors with a simple view of life could only blame Miss James misfortunes to her former love. They couldn't see that perhaps something greater was about to happen and she was about to shut their stupidity once and forever.

Miss James and her former love continued to meet occasionally in gatherings, meetings and parties with mutual friends. There were always cordial and treated each other with decorum. Miss James blood boiled inside everytime she saw him. He only felt regret over his reaction and wished to express his remorse but never did. He had the notion that if Miss James was meant for him sooner or later they would end up together. What an unrealistic idea!

The fact that he didn't say or did anything provided relief for Miss James. He wasn't part of her life and she felt content at his banishment. This will help not only to overcome the affections which she had developed and the love that had prevail but also to take an inner look at herself and realized with great disappointment that her character has mislead her all along. Now she not only admitted her mistakes but went to the very source of them. It was painful for her to look at her past relationships, her former abuse, the lies, the betrayals, and all the complications of her childhood experiences. They were past gone but the scars were quite real and present. She resented not recognizing them before. Probably it would've avoided her a lot of hardships. But now it's all done with and settled. Oh well who would've thought someone's past could affect so adversely their very future?

.................................................


As Miss James continues her deep soul-searching she decides to travel. She travels in and out of the country visiting family members and friends. She decided to stay busy, keep her mind off people who only brought her pain. Among her friends there was a certain young gentleman. His name was Mr. Williams. He had been a long-time family friend. Miss James and Mr. Williams have known each other all their life. They were both the same age, attended the same schools and shared common interest. But now Mr. Williams wasn't the boy she was used to seeing almost everyday. He left his home country to pursue higher education. He had come back as an mature, handsome and succesful young man. Miss James wasn't the annoying little girl who use to pick on him when they were kids. Now she was a beautiful, talented and intelligent young woman. When he came back, he resumed his usual contacts and activities. He was mesmerized by Miss James accomplishments. A year passed by. Miss James was recovering from her blow and Mr. Williams had observed her very carefully.

On a particular day her best friend, Miss Wellington, approached Miss James while she was enjoying a cup of tea. She sits next to her and asks her: "What do you think of Mr. Williams?

Miss James knowing the source of her curiosity replies: "He is a good friend of the family. Handsome and brilliant. I enjoy his company. And no Sofia, I am not interested in him and I really doubt he sees me as anything else but his good old friend."

Miss Wellington smiles and answers: "Well Miss James you are a lot of things, but you are certainly not naive. His attentions to you have been to obvious to be noticed by everyone."

"It's been a year, Sofia, since my final break up with you know who. Perhaps it is more appropiate for me to focus on others events, rather than to be falling in love with someone else."

"A year my friend! I think that is plenty of time. You have done very well. Rejected plenty of offers. Kept to yourself. But you can't allow this man to keep holding you back from what you deserve!"

Miss James looks down on her cup of tea and meditates on her friend's advice. "A year" she thinks. "It took me a lifetime to fall in love with him. I shared my whole life with him for many years. A year is nothing." Miss James kept her thoughts to herself. She was prude and reserved. Her friends notices her reaction and calmly adds:

"This time will be different my lovely friend. You know him very well and he has been your friend this past year. But you have to give yourself a chance. I know you are scared. But would'nt you rather take the risk or always wonder what if?"

Those words sounded very familiar. Not so long ago she had given her best friend similar advice on a matter. In her friend's case it was about a career. In matters of the heart the risk is much greater.

A few moments