The Pleasure of Nobody by Crystal Fox (books to read in your 20s female txt) 📕

his nose then held her hand.

"Go in first sweetheart, I will follow." I told her. Then our hands let go, that ways the very last time our skin will ever touch. I will always remember how soft her skin was. She felt like a rose petal, a rose that was growing in the bushes of a dark winter, she was my winter rose. I watched her walk pass the gate and turn around to motion for me to follow. After my first step, the gates shut. I bent my head down and smelled the burning flowers. The birds flew from the trees as there home caught on fire. I turned around and I saw butterfly's trying to get away but there wings catching on fire, they fell to the ground in ashes that was soon covered in burning flames. Animals of all kind gathered there young and tried to escape. Some where lucky and found there way out. Other families, got caught in flames.

The fire turned blue as it came around me. It was not hot, it was not cold. It was nothing just like me. The blue fire came around me and grew taller until it covered me completely. Then the fire was just like air, it went through my body and then back out. I stumbled forward as it entered me. It was as though I was knocked out of breath when the fire left me. I looked down at my hands, they felt as though they where on fire. My hands had scares and tattoos all over the flesh, my shirt had been burned off and I can see scares and tattoos all over me. The scares where from war. All the times I had been cut or broken. No matter how many times your body is torn, you are broken down, not matter how many wounds heal and now matter how long it has been since the scare was on the skin, they will always be there. When the time comes to show your true self, they will show. My hair no longer touched my shoulders, I felt my head and I had no hair at all, I had more scares on my face. With my hair gone I understand now I am truly defeated. My strength was ripped out of my, and I can barely breath. My tattoos looked like words, until I figured out they where Catholic prayers. Protection prayers, to keep me, the evil away from goodness. The prayers I had once prayed, that I see now never where given to God, because they never left me.

I stand in the middle of gardens of flames, and I can hear the mafia of midnight calling me back to hell. I do not want to go. I turned around and looked at Ivy, she was crying and looked scared. This is what I look like underneath my skin. This is who I am. She looked at me like I am a monster. Like she didn't even know who I was. Before I began to burn along in the flames that where killing the garden, I went up to the gate, with little steps. I kept my head down, and my eyes on the ground. I looked at the way my feet move in union, then I saw the gate come before my feet. I looked up though not at her, I looked at the bars that are keeping me away from her, I wrapped my hand around the bar, and looked right at her tear stained face as she tried to calm Chance down. I wanted to rip the metal away and hold her, though I know that would frighten her.

Tears fell down my face and I saw the fire in her eyes grow behind me.

"I love you," I said to her, in the smallest of whispers. She did not hear me, though that is fine. It is better off for her to be scared of me than to love me, but I truly do love her. I looked at her one more time, then turned around to walk away. Dodging my way around the fire, I walked back down to darkness alone.


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Publication Date: 12-08-2012

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