Patience by Barbara Hofland (that summer book TXT) đź“•
When the parting was really over, it may be supposed each gave herself up for a time to the intense overwhelming sense of sorrow, such a separation must inevitably inflict. Mrs. Aylmer trembled for the future peace of her beloved charge; she revolted at the idea of those employments her mother seemed to point out for her, and not less at the new associates with whom she might be called to mix; and she justly blamed herself for suffering so handsome and attractive a girl as Dora to depart without adverting to th
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Stancliffe was already heated by his loss, and the current of his
vexation immediately turned against the woman who, not content with
heaping wrongs on the head of his wife, thus sought to defame her, not
seeing (in the blindness of his anger) that the accusations against
Dora, were in fact promulgated to assist his character and protect her
own. He flew in his rage to Mrs. Masterman, accused her of speaking ill
of Dora, and added, “that it was a liberty he never would forgive, and
less from her than any one.”
The lady was justly astonished, and perhaps justly offended also, since
the gratuitous scandal she had spread was intended for his benefit; and
as it had long appeared a tacit agreement between them that their
respective partners were to be sacrificed in any way for their mutual
pleasure, she could see no reason for this troublesome start of
conscience. She apprehended, that it rose in fact from the youthful
charms of the person defended; and her rage arose in consequence, words
begat words, and in the midst of those violent bickerings which
unbridled passion produces between persons who are devoid of esteem for
each other, as much as self-command, Mr. Masterman and a commercial
acquaintance entered the room.
The guilty pair were in a moment silenced; but Stancliffe was fully
aware that words had reached the ear of Mr. Masterman, and what was
worse, of his friend, for which he could not fail to call him to
account, since he would probably draw those inferences which his own
sense of guilt led him to dread.
Accustomed as he had long been to witness the extraordinary finesse of
the lady, he yet feared that her present passion would subdue her
accustomed cunning, and that her desire of inflicting vengeance might
even subdue her fear of future punishment:—in overwhelming confusion he
suddenly retired, and hastened to his own house.
Dora, after many hours of close application, had dispatched her letters,
attended to her child, and was dressing for dinner on his bolting into
her room, evidently in terrible disorder; she let her gown fall from her
hands, and stood trembling before him, in the expectation that she had
failed to obey some of the many injunctions he had poured on her at
breakfast time.
Thus in this world, must the innocent often tremble before the
guilty:—but we forbear comment.
“Dora,” said Stancliffe hastily, “I have been making a sad fool of
myself,—entirely on your account;—I have quarrelled with that infernal
woman,—Mrs. Masterman, I mean.”
Dora half smiled.
“It is no jest, I assure you:—that dolt, poor Masterman, came in, and
another person with him, so that he will be obliged to look into the
affair, for madam is so completely on the high ropes, she will not
condescend to cajole him—heaven defend me from such a fury!—we
quarrelled entirely about you; therefore you must get me out of the
scrape.”
“I will do any thing in my power—surely a man may be pardoned for
speaking too strongly on behalf of his own wife, if that were your
fault.”
“It was, entirely—but, Dora, people do not quarrel as we were
quarrelling, unless—it strikes me that this silly fellow will become
suspicious, that he will probably seek you, and question you—now you
never were jealous of any thing improper, you know.”
Dora was silent.
“You never were jealous, surely?”
“Stancliffe, look at these thin arms, this wasted form, and these pale
cheeks—they are my answer.”
“You do, indeed, look very ill; very different to what you were; but I
did not think it arose from that—I have been a wretch, a fool, a
madman—what will become of me? I see you will not help me, nor can I
ask you.”
He struck his clenched hands on his forehead, burning tears started into
his eyes, the fear of shame, and the consciousness of folly, so wounding
to pride, seemed to rush upon and rend his heart. Dora, in scarcely
inferior distress, threw her arms around him, and sought to soothe the
frenzy of the moment by every suggestion her mind could furnish for that
purpose; and at length proposed going herself, to offer apology on his
behalf to Mrs. Masterman, for his temper.
“No,” cried Stancliffe, “I will die first—I would rather fight him a
thousand times—in fact, if fighting were all that were required, I
should be easy—but it is other things which torture me.”
He threw himself in agony across the bed, hiding his face with his
hands.—“Alas!” thought Dora, “this is not a cause for which a man
should risk his life—surely it is my duty in such a moment as this, to
do any thing, every thing, that can avert these horrors; I must conquer
all pride, all repugnance—I must submit”—
A gentle tap at the moment broke upon her startled ear, as if it were a
summons to meet some terrible disaster; she opened the door, and beheld
Frank.
“Mr. Masterman and another gentleman, have been examining me just as if
they were lawyers; they asked me such strange questions, you can’t
think, sister.”
“What questions?” said Stancliffe, jumping up and gazing on the boy with
terrific eagerness.
“They asked if you were very passionate?”
“Well! and what did you answer?”
“I said, prodigiously.”
“Um—um, that was right; go on.”
“They said, did you speak cross to my sister, i. e. were you rude in
your speech, forgetting she were a lady?—I told them, when you were in
a passion, you always expressed yourself in a very violent manner.”
“True enough—go on.”
“They looked at one another, and said, that was very satisfactory; which
I thought very odd.”
“Well, did they go away?”
“No, they asked me if you loved my sister; and I said, to be sure you
did.”
“You are a very good boy, Frank—very good indeed.”
“I thought it a silly question, for every body must love Dora, and
especially her husband; but they said again, it was very satisfactory,
of course you would write a note of apology, and went away, talking
about what fools men made of themselves; so I came up stairs to tell
Dora, because I did not think it was at all handsome of them to ask me
such odd questions.”
Frank retired, and Dora falling on her knees, in the accents of revived
hope and deep gratitude, thanked God for the relief she felt from the
severest sense of sorrow and terror she had ever experienced.
Stancliffe’s own heart was deeply moved by a sense of mercy extended to
him, when he was on the very verge of destruction, and when he felt the
arms of his innocent and injured wife clasped around him, and heard her
in the most gentle manner beseech him “to use the present moment for
effecting a total liberation from his enslaver, and thus proving his
sincerity and thankfulness for the present escape;” his heart was
melted, his tears flowed freely from penitence and love, and he promised
far more than even Dora had requested.
So soon as the agitation of this trying scene subsided, Stancliffe wrote
a note, intreating the pardon of Mrs. Masterman for the violence he had
been guilty of, but added, “that since the cause could not fail to
affect his mind, and render him liable to repeat the offence, he had
determined to deny himself all future opportunities of offending, and
restrict his intercourse with Mr. M. to their unavoidable connections in
business.”
When this letter was dispatched, the writer felt as if a mountain were
removed from his breast, and a film had been plucked from his eyes; but
he had not the courage to look back upon the conduct which had rendered
his home unpleasant, and his wife indifferent to him—he could not
endure the pain of reflecting upon the cruelty of his own inflictions on
the kind and tender heart of her whom he had bound himself to protect;
nor would his pride confess, how worthless had been his compensations
for sacrificing his wife’s happiness, his own ease of conscience, and
chance of disgrace, and the sense of having injured the man who trusted
him, and whom he had placed in actual possession of his property.
Stancliffe, in flying from his seducer, and escaping from the infamy
which was his due, lost the salutary effects of punishment, and in
returning to his happiness, conceived himself to be meritorious; hence a
transaction in its own nature awful, passed over him with little actual
improvement to the heart, even whilst it beneficially affected his
conduct.
Accustomed, herself, to all the subterfuges of cunning, and alarmed
beyond all former fears, Mrs. Masterman saw only in his conduct the same
effects which had agitated herself, and doubted not, when his fears had
subsided, that he would contrive some means of seeing her, and condoling
with her on their mutual sufferings; but when she found that he still
kept aloof, that he had the insolence of remaining at home, or walking
out with his wife, and even paying her the most affectionate attention,
her rage became unbounded, and would have led her to the most fatal
excesses, if it had not been tempered by that self-love which was her
ruling principle, and told her that revenge might be more effectually
secured by time than violence.
Mrs. Masterman, at one period, had despised her paramour for the very
facility with which she had moulded him to her will; but she was now
become fond of him, and would have given the world to recall him.
Judging by her own feelings, she concluded that her empire over him was
the same it had been; but this was far from the case, even before their
rupture, and since then, as the present fascination of the senses had
ceased, all regard for her had vanished, and memory never presented her
in any other view to his mind, than as a woman who had misled him for
the purpose of inveigling him into a convenient partnership with her
husband. Thus doth sin graft sorrow on the vices it has
planted.—Innocence hath no need to seek vengeance for the injuries it
may receive, they rarely fail to be punished even where they escape
detection.
It had been so self-evident that Mr. Masterman’s business could be
carried on in London much better than Liverpool, that he had wished for
some time to remove thither, but was prevented by the remonstrances of a
wife to whom he always yielded, and a partner whose interest gave him a
right to dictate. In order to prove her own power, Mrs. M. now advised
their removal earnestly, in the full persuasion that Stancliffe would
refuse his consent; but to her bitter mortification, she found, through
her husband, that he approved the suggestion, and sought so earnestly to
forward their scheme, as to offer to settle all the private debts of Mr.
Masterman in order to facilitate it.
Caught in her own trap, the lady resolved that Stancliffe should pay
dearly in the accommodation he offered, for the final separation he thus
inflicted; nor was she without the hope of renewing that acquaintance in
London precluded by circumstances in their present situation. She set
out with avidity, yet left behind her debts to an amount so far
exceeding all the calculations of Stancliffe, as seriously to distress
him, and add to that distress, by the natural belief, that when thrown
at so great a distance from his cognizance, she would not fail by her
expences to involve both her husband and himself in one common ruin.
Stancliffe revealed his difficulties and his fears
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