Patience by Barbara Hofland (that summer book TXT) đź“•
When the parting was really over, it may be supposed each gave herself up for a time to the intense overwhelming sense of sorrow, such a separation must inevitably inflict. Mrs. Aylmer trembled for the future peace of her beloved charge; she revolted at the idea of those employments her mother seemed to point out for her, and not less at the new associates with whom she might be called to mix; and she justly blamed herself for suffering so handsome and attractive a girl as Dora to depart without adverting to th
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Such was the state of their correspondence, when, in the long-protracted
spring of 1814, Mrs. Aylmer was seized by a severe illness, which
reduced her to the brink of the grave, and left her so weak, that a
residence for two or three successive winters in the south of France,
was earnestly recommended to her. It was the more easy for her to follow
this advice, in consequence of one of her neighbours, Mr. Sydenham,
having resolved to remove thither with the greatest part of his young
family, being desirous to procure for them the advantages of education,
without infringing on that narrow income which rendered him a resident
in his present cheap retirement. Such a change was contemplated by Dora
and her companions with that delight natural to the young and curious;
for although all were happy where they were, yet they all were at an age
when mere change has a charm to the buoyant spirit, and enquiring mind.
The illness of Mrs. Aylmer had been the first affliction her beloved
charge had known:—it had fallen like a shower on a thirsty land,
giving temporary gloom, and sorrow, to be repaid by fertilizing the
soil, and calling forth flowers and fruit, from the hidden seeds, and
deeply implanted lessons, of early days. Dora rose, in this season of
trial, from a fond, artless, ingenuous child, to a sensible, reflecting,
affectionate young woman; who united to perfect simplicity and
sensibility, the mild fortitude which rendered her love efficient in its
services, and gave to her attentions that value rarely derived from any
quality but experience.
She became, indeed, not less the darling daughter, than the beloved
friend, of her protectress; and when Mrs. Aylmer first ventured to leave
her own house, which was for the purpose of attending the table of our
Lord, thither Dora (for the first time) accompanied her. Every woman of
feeling who has had the happiness of being led to the communion table in
early life, by a tender parent, or guardian, will ever look back upon
that hour as the most awful, yet most endeared to memory, of any in
their existence. They will retrace the humility and sincerity of their
devotions; and the sense of being exalted by this open profession of
their faith, which, by rendering them members of the Church of Christ,
gave them a sense of being ennobled, and purified, yet bound to
obedience and submission, by new duties, and stronger ties:—the sublime
gratitude, the holy rapture, the spiritual aspirations of their souls in
such moments, may be obscured in future life, but never can be
obliterated.
Dora felt the holy emotions incident to this delightful duty, this
blessed privilege, with all that intensity of interest, natural to one
who was more especially called upon for thankfulness; and she was
affected so much as almost to overcome her friend. When these
high-wrought affections subsided, there was still left a peculiar
suavity of manners, a solicitude to do right, an activity in the
exercise of benevolent affections, and an oblivion to petty injuries,
which proved that if the rose was fled, its odour remained; and as the
shining of the patriarch’s face shewed “with whom he had been,” so did
the conduct of Dora, though assuming no peculiarity, shew that she was
adding to all that had appeared amiable in her character, that which was
virtuous, pious, and solid.
She could not, however, fail to feel even more anxiety on the subject of
the expected letter, than she thought right, in consequence of some
hints which had within the last three months dropped from her mother on
the subject of her absence. Often had Dora earnestly desired to visit
her family, (indeed she desired it now;) but the idea of leaving her
friend at a time when she so evidently required her attention, and of
renouncing the pleasures the journey itself promised her, was a double
sacrifice, from which she very naturally shrunk.
This necessary digression brings us again to the expected letter, which,
contrary to all precedent, really arrived on the evening in question,
and put a decisive negative on the requested permission to travel,
softened, in the writer’s opinion, by an assurance that they had
intended to send for Dora for some time; not only that she might form an
acquaintance with her family, by a residence of a year or two, but that
she might be an assistant to her father, seeing she wrote an excellent
hand, and had doubtless been well instructed in the French language by
dear Mrs. Aylmer, whose knowledge of that tongue they well remembered.
She added, that Mr. Hemingford had very indifferent health; having had a
great loss in his partner, Mr. Stancliffe, whose son was abroad, so
that altogether he was at a loss for a clever, dutiful child, and hoped
Dora would make it up to him for some time at least:—perhaps they might
send her abroad by and by;—there was no saying; particular
circumstances had arisen, but could not be explained. Undoubtedly Mr.
Sydenham’s family would supply the loss of Dorothea, for whom she would
send a proper escort as far as Gloucester. She hoped if her dear, dear
friend had it in her power to send over a little Mecklin lace, &c. she
would not forget it, and was with love to the child, &c. &c.
Never could a decision so important be made, according to Mrs. Aylmer’s
conception of it, more ungraciously;—she saw that Mrs. Hemingford rent
asunder the habits and bonds of two people who had grown side by side,
during almost the whole life of one party, with as much ease as if she
had torn a piece of muslin in two; and her heart recoiled from trusting
a daughter who felt only too much with a mother who felt sadly too
little. Yet a second and a third reading convinced her that the mandate
must be submitted to; and Dora, though her heart was too full to permit
her to speak, signified that she believed it to be her duty to comply
with the requisition; and she endeavoured to endure it firmly, and even
cheerfully, lest her sorrow should add to the pain of her friend.
When the parting was really over, it may be supposed each gave herself
up for a time to the intense overwhelming sense of sorrow, such a
separation must inevitably inflict. Mrs. Aylmer trembled for the future
peace of her beloved charge; she revolted at the idea of those
employments her mother seemed to point out for her, and not less at the
new associates with whom she might be called to mix; and she justly
blamed herself for suffering so handsome and attractive a girl as Dora
to depart without adverting to those offers which, in a large town,
might probably soon arise to her.
Dora, on her part, felt wretched at the idea that her beloved friend
should have need of her little services and find them not; but she tried
to cheer herself by the remembrance of Eliza Sydenham’s kindness, and
when the first gust of sorrow was past, endeavoured to subdue all
repugnance, to consider cheerful obedience as the test of her faith, the
just submission to her heavenly Father, exacted by her earthly parents,
towards whom she looked with the more affection the nearer she
approached them.
When at last she reached the place of her birth, these emotions became
almost too much for her, and it is scarcely possible to describe her
jarring sensations, when the first words that broke on her ear, was loud
reproof to the servant who attended her, from a tall, thin, but
gentlemanly looking person, whom she justly concluded to be her father,
and whose pleasure, (if he had any,) in receiving her, was not
sufficient to balance the vexation he experienced in finding she had
been detained an hour beyond the time he had expected her.
Turning from the man, he at length addressed her, with—
“Well, Dolly,—you’re sadly tired, I suppose; come along—your mother
and Catharine are gone to the play, but you shall have some tea
presently.”
As he spoke, he took her by the hand, and kissed her cheek: timid as
Dora was, and struck as she had been by his first address, her heart was
moved; she threw her arm round his neck, and said tenderly, “dear, dear
father.”
Scarcely was she seated, when a shrill voice was heard, saying, “I will
go in, I will see my new sister;” and immediately a pale, but very
pretty boy, in a flannel dressing gown, startled Dora by appearing
before her.
It was very evident, from the gentle manners of the father to this his
darling child, as well as from his own style of behaviour, that this
child was the indulged Idol of the family. He looked earnestly, yet
kindly at Dora, asked her various questions, and at length said with an
air of patronage, very inconsistent with the dependance indicated by his
sickly looks,
“I shall love you, I am sure, very much, for you are not proud like
Catharine, nor cross like Louisa, and not tired of me as Mama is,—have
you brought me any thing?”
“I will give you some pretty books, and some sea-shells, in the morning,
my dear.”
“You are a good sister;—they sha’nt call you Welsh woman, nor Dolly
Downe, nor heiress, that they sha’nt.”
Mr. Hemingford interposed now, to persuade him to go to bed, which was a
little resisted, in the usual style of spoiled children; but when Dora
joined in the intreaty, he complied.
“You had better follow his example, child, for there is no saying when
Mrs. Hemingford will be at home,” said the father, very soon, and Dora
obeyed, for she was exhausted less by the fatigue she had undergone,
than the grief she had suffered; the surprise, and pain, she felt in
finding her mother and sister so engaged, was very great, and she wished
to hide it from her father.
Dora was greeted by Frank’s voice on her awaking:—she jumped out of
bed, aware that she had slept late, and expecting to see her mother
enter every moment; but no such interruption took place: at the door,
the little hand of Frank, (who had been long waiting for her,) eagerly
clasped hers, and a sense of the sweetness of fraternal ties, soothed
and consoled her heart; and she descended with an open countenance and
confiding mind.
Mr. and Mrs. Hemingford, their two daughters, and a visitant, were at
breakfast, seated round a table where Catharine presided; and as all the
ladies were in black, Dora, on casting her eyes round, saw so little
distinction in their appearance, that she could not fix on any one, whom
she thought old enough to be her mother:—the mistake was a happy one;
it procured a kind kiss from the lady in question, but the salutes of
the sisters were alike cold and ceremonious.
Mrs. Hemingford, notwithstanding the births and burials which made up
the history of her life for the last twenty years, (which, together with
increased irritability in her husband’s temper, arising from many
misfortunes and great cause for care and depression, might have
subjected her to anxiety and exertion,) yet preserved her pretty face,
and smart little person, wonderfully unimpaired. She was sufficiently
en bon point to preserve her fair, smooth skin, without a wrinkle; and
possessed, in a singular degree, the voice of early life, and a
propensity to a kind of chuckling laugh, which in her school days had
gained her the bye name of “giggling Kitty.” Her dress was precisely the
same with that of her daughters, and was alike elegant and becoming:—in
fact, to adorn herself, her daughters, and her house, had been
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