My Love Taken Over by Carly Jensen (books to read now txt) 📕

It was the beginning of sixth grade, That’s when I saw her standing there. Let me just say I wasn’t looking to date anyone that school year… Or even make friends for that matter. But as I got farther and farther into the school year, I started making friend after friend after friend. That’s when I decided to just let the school year lead me through.

I started to sit with a certain group of people every day at lunch… although she wasn’t in that group. I never had the courage to even look her way let alone talk to her or at least attempt too. I never knew what it was about her or why I couldn’t talk to her. So I just kept to myself and bottled up my feelings for her. Each day she would sit with her own group of friends and I would try not to look over there… It never worked. I would always for some reason not be able to take my eyes off of that table. It drove me insane! I never knew why I couldn’t stop looking over there. But I just let my mind and body do what they pleased its not like I could control what my mind thought about… No one can.

Weeks and weeks pasted by I still hadn’t even tried to talk to her, I was to scared. There was just something about her. Was it her beauty? Was it her hair? The clothes she wore? I had no clue. No one had ever done this to me. My mind didn’t know what to think, and neither did I.

It was around the middle of last year. I and the people I sat with at lunch started to fight… next thing I knew me and them were far from being friends. We were… enemies anymore. That’s when Alexus came into the picture. She saw that I had no one to sit with at lunch and asked me if I wanted to sit with her and her friends. Little did I know… the girl that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of sat with Alexus everyday at lunch.

I didn’t know what to say do or think. I spoke without thinking and said “Yeah sure”

When lunch time came I was completely terrified. I didn’t know what I would say or do. I was so terrified I couldn’t even think straight. Standing in line at lunch seemed to have taken forever. When I got my lunch I looked for the table… when I spotted it I was terrified beyond this world. It took me a little while to get the courage up to go over there. When I got to the table Alexus said “Hey girl” and introduced me to the whole group. First was Mathew, then Armando… then it was her. I was so terrified. I didn’t say anything except hi the whole lunch.

After a couple lunch periods I started to talk more often and start conversations. But for some reason… When ever she was talking I got this feeling inside of me. I didn’t know what it was or how to make it go away. Truth is it wouldn’t go away no matter what I did.

She and I started to talk as the weeks flew by. I found myself stuttering a lot. But for some weird reason I only stuttered when I was talking to her. It was like she had me under a spell. But what spell? I didn’t know. All I knew is I would sweat and stutter when I talked to her. I didn’t get it at all! It was the middle of winter and I was sweating while talking to her! By this time I swore that she had me under some type of spell. But I still didn’t know what type of spell this girl had me under… and the fact that it was only her that made me act this way.

After sitting with them all for about 2 months I was talking much more. But still stuttered and sweated when I was talking to her… Or even just heard her talk. By this time I thought I was completely insane. I didn’t trust myself around her. I couldn’t figure out for the life of me why I acted this way around her… or why I stuttered, sweated. I couldn’t even figure out why my head was in a cluster! My own mind and I couldn’t figure it out!

11:45 rolled around and that means lunch time. I was still very confused and nervous around her and with the whole situation itself. When I got my lunch I slowly walked up to the table nervous and shaky as could be like always. Everyone says hey and I say hey back and the conversations begin. Same as always I started to sweat and stare at her. Some days she would ask what I’m staring at and I just froze. I didn’t know what to say I just sat there stunned, nervous and scared. I asked my self over and over what should you say. I never got an answer. My mind was in such a cluster. I couldn’t answer her… so I just got up and threw my tray away. That went on for weeks and weeks.

That night I went home and lay on my bed and thought about everything she causes me to go through. At first I had no clue what it could be about her that had gotten me this way. I had no clue still… then it hit me right square in the face……… I had fallen in love with her.

The next day I kept trying to understand how I could have fallen in love with a complete stranger to me. It’s possible though I told myself. But then I thought…… why her? I didn’t know. But what ever the reason was didn’t matter. I liked the feeling…… I no longer cared that I basically suffered around her. It was a good type of suffering. I liked it…… I don’t know why but I really liked it.

There was just one problem though I didn’t know if she was straight or bisexual. When I realized that I just felt like crying. I could feel my eyes start to tear up. And this wasn’t a happy cry either. I told myself that I would have to find out that information some how. But how? I realized then that as time went by we would get closer and closer.

Sure enough I was right by almost the end of the year we were best friends. We were like a monkey and a banana. We were like un-spreadable.

Time went by week after week. It was after lunch one say when a sudden urge came over me to go over to Hannah’s desk. I wasn’t about to fight myself this time. When I went over there she was in the middle of talking to someone on yahoo. I asked her who she was talking to and that’s when it happened. She said “I’m talking to my GF.”

I asked her “Your bi?”

She said “Yes but shhhhh I don’t want everyone knowing yet”

So I didn’t say anything. Inside I was jumping up and down with excitement. I found out that she was like me Bi. I was speechless. In a good way of course… but wow was I happy.

Days and days past… I still had no clue how to tell her I liked her way more then a friend. I didn’t even know if I should tell her or if it was better of being a secret. I thought to myself of what could happen if I told her. There were of course good and bad results as there are in most situations… but this situation was a BIG deal for me. I didn’t just want to open my mouth and ruin everything… but at the same time I wanted to tell her so very bad. But she already had a GF and she seemed happy with her at the moment being… so I just kept my mouth shut.

A couple of weeks had gone by sense I found out about Hannah being Bi. My emotions for her kept building up in me, I felt like I was going to explode! But I kept telling myself to calm down and take a